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[King Zultan]

Granted, you get the powers you wanted, but while testing your powers you set your house on fire and lose everything you own.

I wish that everyone had pyrokinesis.

[wierd]

Granted.  However, said powers do not violate conservation of energy laws, and so requires combustible materials.  The flagrant use of these powers has released absurd levels of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere, and has also denuded the biosphere of most biomatter (because, what else are you gonna burn?).  Humans can make flammable things go whoosh at will, but now the planet is a burning hell. In all the ways that really matter.

I wish I did not have to work tomorrow (without conversely also suffering some horrific malady.)

[pikachu17]

Losing you job is not exactly a malady.

I wish I was a real boy.

[MrLurkety]

Granted, but you are ostracized by your peers, and if you stay in one place for more than ten minutes you will be lynched.


I wish for nesting statements.

[Mathel]

Granted. Said statements nest on your head and shout themselves at other people. They are also all false.

I wish for all humans to be unable to lie.

[King Zultan]

Granted, lives are ruined because of the lack of lies, and nations crumble as state secrets are revealed.

I wish for all humans to be unable to tell the truth.

[KittyTac]

Granted. Now nobody can trust anyone, and society collapses.

I wish for kittens.

[MrLurkety]

Granted. Now nobody can trust anyone, and society collapses.

I wish for kittens.

Granted. You get 10^99 kittens, which promptly collapse into a black hole.


I wish that my eye would stop itching.

[Mathel]

Granted. Your eye has been removed.

I wish for sandwitches.

[wierd]

Granted.  Foul, cackling women with bony features and an insatiable hunger for children now erupt from any patch of sand whenever you are near.

I wish for a single night where the residents I care for do not act batshit crazy.

[King Zultan]

Granted, they all die during the night and people seem to think you're responsible.

I wish for everything on Earth to be replaced with zebras.

[KittyTac]

Granted. Not only every atom, every quark and electron in every atom is replaced with a full-grown zebra. Needless to say, the ridiculous mass of the resulting ball of zebras causes it to collapse into an immense black hole that destroys our solar system and some neighboring ones.

I wish for a single kitten.

[Ultimuh]

Granted, you didn't say it had to be alive though.


I wish to get my hands on the Kittenomicon.

[KitRougard]

Made of the skin of a thousand screaming kittens, the Kittenomicon is a terrible sight, maddening to behold, and CORRUPTING to command.

Soon enough, you're just another cultist sacrificing random people to the Gods of Meow.

Welcome to Jail.


I wish.

[Dunamisdeos]

You Wish you were in jail, because the pocket dimension that the Kittenomicon has sucked you and others into is far worse.

I wish to curry favor with the unholy yet fuzzy denizens of the Kitten Dimension.