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[bloop_bleep]

Granted. You overwrite one instance of Roblox with Dwarf Fortress. Some 400-pound brony living in a small flat in Philadelphia experiences a moment's confusion as to why all these weird characters just popped up on his screen, but otherwise nothing changes.

I wish that the Roblox servers are destroyed by a +dolomite statue+ of a dwarf raising a pickaxe dropped from the heavens.

[Eschar]

I wish that the Roblox servers are destroyed by a +dolomite statue+ of a dwarf raising a pickaxe dropped from the heavens.

((Can you not use adamantine for statues? And why not use a masterwork statue for it? Or artifact?))

[Rockeater]

Granted, The falling statue cause a stractural collaps of the bulding in which the servers where hosted and destroy the entire farm and kill evrybodey in there.

I wish I would live on a man made moon colony without man eating animals.

[pikachu17]

(Why does everyone want Roblox destroyed?)

[Maximum Spin]

Granted; you get man-eating vegetables and minerals instead!

I wish to own Crimea.

[Ultimuh]

Granted. But it is forcibly re-annexed by Russia.
You on the other hand, vanish from official records under mysterious circumstances.

I wish to rule Britannia!

[Mathel]

Granted. The French do not like you annexing their penninsula and as you have no army, they just arrest you.

I wish to see it without being involved.

[Rockeater]

Granted.You see it from the plane to the US after the faild attempt of you and Maximum spin to annex Crimea, You are jailed in the US now

I wish to not get involved in any annexing.

[Puppyguard]

Granted, by flying away as the world is destroyed by meteors, you do not get involved in any annexing.

I wish for a delicious cookie recipe.

[Mathel]

Granted. Here you have a cookie recipe, written with honey on butter.

I wish to have suits of armor fitted for my family.

[wierd]

Granted.  This was a bit difficult to grant, as I had to reach backward in time to snatch already fitted suits of armor, tailored for your dead ancestors, but it perfectly meets the criteria you specified.  (Due to flagrant infidelities in the dark ages, most people of European descent are related to some noble or other, so this is a pretty straightforward wish to grant.)

I cant' speak on how well it fit your LIVING relatives, but rest assured, they were tailor made for your ancestors!

I wish the madness at work would stop.

[Puppyguard]

Granted, but it starts up on the road instead.

I wish for the letter "I" to be purged from the alphabet.

[pikachu17]

Wsh granted.
 wsh that  could fly.

[Ultimuh]

Granted.
You can only fly for seven seconds at a taeme. And you need an hour of rest each taeme you want to fly.

Ae Waesh the letter "ae" returned to the alphabet.

[pikachu17]

Those two letters have not left the alphabet.
 wsh  had a magical sword.