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[deathpunch578]

Granted. however the stapler has stapled your hand to your desk

I wish I had tickets to a GWAR concert.

[Puppyguard]

Granted, you shove a person at a GWAR Concert stealing the tickets, unfortunately you stumble into the vampiric maximum spin. Maximum spin pushes you over and takes the tickets for themself.

I wish for a sixteen pieces of raw bacon to materialize five feet in front of me.

[Cadeyrn Heffernan]

Granted, and they are massive pieces, but Maximum Spin sets his dogs loose and they steal your bacon. The unnecessarily large pieces feed his dogs for a week, saving his food costs.

I wish the last actions for Spacestory would get posted so we can continue.

[Puppyguard]

Granted, but no update comes because maximum spin is trying to get his dogs who are still loose.

I wish for my bacon back.

[Ultimuh]

Granted. You have them back and.. oh hey, Maximum Spin's dogs are approaching fast!



I wish for.. uuh.. I dunno.. Oktoberfest 2? *shrugs*

[Gentlefish]

Oktoberfest 2: Electric Boogaloo take place inside heavily electrified bungalows. The workers are safe inside faraday cages. You, however, cannot resist jerking around like a madman due to the current running through your body and thus spill all your drinks.

I wish industrial techno and avant garde musics became the mainstream.

[Cyne-Wulf]

Granted, but the quality goes down drastically and Maximum Spin gets all the royalties instead of the bands, so they quickly go bankrupt, while Maximum Spin gets more wishes.

I wish I didn't know the story of Obok Meatgod and wasn't the curious sort so I didn't understand Ultimah's reference to him, and never would. Shudders

[Mathel]

Granted. However in order to delete such ingrained information, all your memory containing any reference to Dwarf Fortress is deleted.

I wish my phone to function properly.

[Cyne-Wulf]

((I am torn- It is both not worth it and worth it....))

[Paxiecrunchle]

Granted your phone now properly functions as a miniaturized toaster.

I wish my mathematical skills were of astounding quality for a human being and if possible I also wish for a colorful umbrella.

[Puppyguard]

Granted, Your mathematical skills are of astounding quality but only when you hold your colorful umbrella. For it is enchanted with a deep eldritch magic that causes it to give you your powers. Unfortunately, each time you use your astounding abilities, Maximum spin siphons a small portion of your soul away.

I wish to teleport to safety with my bacon while staying alive.

[Maximum Spin]

You teleport to safety with your bacon, and also all the other bacon in existence, past, present, and future. Since you specified that you will stay alive, you will have to live out the rest of your life buried under a smothering pile of fried meat. Before you ask, no, you're facing the wrong way to eat your way out. Now, how do I benefit from this, you ask? Well, the smell of bacon makes me nauseous, and now I don't have to smell it because it's all been teleported onto you.

I wish to craft something neat out of these chunks of Paxiechruncle's soul. Like maybe a demonic artefact or something.

[Gigabytebob]

you craft a neat soul doe its like play doe but it has blood curdling screams every time you touch it

I wish for a paper hat

[GigaGiant]

Granted. Enjoy.


I wish that I, GigaGiant, could live up to my name.

[Puppyguard]

Granted, you become a giga giant bacteria(as big as the average comma)

I wish for an AWESOME paper hat.