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[Sir Elventide]

You got Exterminatus'ed before you could even taste one bean.

I wish for relaxation

[Puppyguard]

Granted, Your eyes are removed and your head is placed into a jar. You are constantly pumped nutrients and unfathomable drugs to keep you asleep and alive.

I wish for a tree.

[Ultimuh]

Granted, its a manchineel tree!


I wish for Rickrolls.

[Puppyguard]

Granted, a man named 'rick' rolls into you and you both tumble off a cliff. In your last moments before slamming into the ground he hums rickroll.

I wish for the ability to control minds.

[Sir Elventide]

Your mind control ability has the unintended side effect of peering into the target's mind. Not knowing this, you then tried to mind control an old woman with deplorable sexual fantasies concerning you...

I wish for (more) elven beauty!

[Stirk]

Granted. You turn into a tree. What could be more elvenly beautiful than a tree?
Dwarves then cut you down for a beer barrel.

I wish for the next wish to rhyme with its corruption!

[Sir Elventide]

A corrupted wish that rhymes, don't you see! You're sent back to ancient times, hee hee hee!

I wish for a better joke.

[Mathel]

Granted the joke is a yoke.
It is on your neck,
till you bring me snack.

I wish for corruptions to not rhyme anymore.

[Sir Elventide]

Congratulations, now corruptions can't rhyme anymore, even when you want them to.

I wish that I can bitch slap the Hulk

[Madman198237]

You get in a slapping contest with the Hulk.

On the bright side, you make a lovely shade of crimson paint.

I wish for telekinesis.

[Puppyguard]

Granted, you gain telekinesis. The downside is you don't know how to properly utilize your powers and accidentally snap your head off.

I wish for the ability to speak and understand any language.

[Sir Elventide]

Unfortunately, that includes the language of the Old Ones. Your puny brain melts from the realization of it all.

I wish to be the mayor of R'lyeh

[Ultimuh]

Granted. You are now a sea sponge. A dapper one at that. Top hat and everything!
Too bad you don't actually do much, if fact, you lack basic human mental capacity. But hey! At least people keep voting for you!



I wish for more Deep Ones.

[Mathel]

Granted. They are inside the spoiler.

Spoiler: Deep ones (click to show/hide)

I wish for more floaters (disarmed).

[Khan Boyzitbig]

Granted, however someone had the idea to merge a Muton Berserker with a floater. The result is an unholy abomination that flies and needs no weapons.

I wish for a (Brotherhood) Banshee.