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[NJW2000]

Granted already, the world isn't.

I wish that there were fewer blisters on my feet.

[Stirk]

Granted! One of the blisters moves to the inside of your nose. This is like the worst place to get blisters.

I wish to own a fleet of tanks!

[vkiNm]

Granted, your fleet of tanks sank into the pacific.

I wish Ported Console games weren't so bad on PC.

[crazyabe]

Granted, Console games aren't Ported to PC.


I wish for twelve Gallons of Lighter Fluid.

[Maegil]

>WISH PARSER CAN NOT COMPUTE GALLON
>IMPERIAL GALLON US WET GALLON US DRY GALLON CORN GALLON WINE GALLON ALE GALLON COAL GALLON ONE OF MANY EXCHEQUER GALLONS TREASURY GALLON BUCKET ALL NONE SCREW THAT
>SI UNITS ONLY PLEASE!_

I wish the bloody yanks dropped those weird roller-coaster units and joined the civilized world.

[crazyabe]

Gratnted, Anyone who has ever yanked anything Decides to never use The American System, however Some french Idot decides to make an unintelligible System that Runs on base 17¹/₂. this new system becomes the new American system.

I wish for Ten Tons of Roc.

[Maegil]

>WISH PARSER CAN NOT COMPUTE TON
>TON IMPERIAL TON LONG TON SHORT TON METRIC TON VOLUME TON CONTAINS BETWEEN 35 AND 100 CUBIC FEET
>WISH PARSER CAN NOT COMPUTE FEET
>WARNING WARNING POSSIBLE FEET DEFINITIONS OVERLOAD PARSER
>EMERGENCY PROCESS ABEND
>SI UNITS ONLY PLEASE!_

I wish those bloody yanks would follow UK's example and changed to SI units already, even if grudgingly and half-heartedly.

[Stirk]

Granted. The massive confusion in the public, which has no idea how SI units work, leads to massive panic that ends in nuclear strikes hitting every SI-unit using country in the planet and America going back to using cubits.

I wish Maegil would actually answer the wishes instead of looking down on the glorious Imperial units.

[Maegil]

Granted, Maegil will look down on normal Imperial units and customary US units, never on "glorious Imperial units" (since there's no such thing).

I wish that using Imperial or customary US units on the internet got the perpetrators banned for a day per infraction.

[Eric Blank]

Granted, but any use of SI units is also a ban able offense. All discussion or complaints of these rules is grounds for permanent banishment from all the internet.

I wish wankers would quit wankin about systems of measurement

[Maegil]

Granted, wankers won't wank about Imperial or customary US units systems; instead, wankers actually praise them. On the other hand, anyone even moderately intelligent will knowledgeably call out of Imperial or customary US units as being silly, senseless, illogical, inane, asinine, unreasonable, nonsensical, etc..

I wish to change the subject.

[crazyabe]

Granted, The old Subject of an Alien's Anal Probing is Dropped out of the Sky and You are Picked up to be their new Subject.


I Wish I was an Alien.

[Stirk]

Granted. However, as you are obsessed with Imperial measurements, the only way to insure it doesn't get brought up again was to ban you permanently. After all, you started this discussion.

Granted! You are kicked out of America and sent back to your home country, as you are an illegal alien. That country may or may not use SI units.

I wish for an AKM!

[crazyabe]

Granted, you get an ACME AKM, it immediately Explodes.


I Wish I owned a Uranium mine.

[UnicodingUnicorn]

Granted, however it has been depleted. Would make a nice bunker though.

I wish for an orca plushie.