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[crazyabe]

Granted, It's Called The bomb of USA, and it Eliminates Everything within Three Light years of earth.


I wish to be somewhere not Communist.

[NJW2000]

Granted, you're somewhere very very vey capitalist. And you're one of the proletariat.

I wish that I lived in a Scandinavian country.

[Eric Blank]

Granted. It's Finland. You're also out in the middle of the wilderness.


I wish for hugs.

[crazyabe]

Granted, You get hugs from Large Rabid Polar bears.


I wish I was in Russia.

[vkiNm]

Granted, you're in Soviet Russia 1943 and is conscripted to fight the Third Reich.

I wish for good things.

[crazyabe]

Granted, You Get Several "Good" Flash drives of Pedophilia, a "Good" Ton of Uranium, and rather "Good" Subscription to Terrorist's Porn Monthly. The Feds are Currently Detaining you however.


I Wish I had a Time machine.

[Tomasque]

 Suddenly, you-from-an-alternate-dimension arrives in a time machine. He says "You - by which I mean I - have a time machine, but because of extremely contrived reasons I have to kill you - meaning actual you - right now."

     He kills you.

 I wish for more wishes

[TalonisWolf]

Granted, you are given other people wishes, including the suicidal ones.

I wish I could rule all the nice things.

[Stirk]

Granted! You rule over Nice, France, and everything in it with an iron fist. NATO is quickly mobilizing to liberate the city, and will probably have it freed by the time I am done posting this.

I wish you a merry Christmas!

[HugeNerdAndProudOfIt]

granted, i have such a wonderful time that i drink too much fermented eggnog and go on a killing spree and kill you.

i wish that a 10CP rattata spawns in pokemon go.

[DAPARROT]

granted, but nobody can catch it

i wish that 0=1

[Pearofclubs]

Granted. Advanced alien life forms descend to earth, and their leader demonstrates to our greatest scientific minds how, in fact, 0 = 1. Immediately afterwards they declare war and eradicate all of humanity. You are the last one to die, and when you ask why they did it, they simply say that "We take no joy in it, but any who learn our secret must die." You manage to get out half your next question wondering why they told us in the first place before you are disintegrated.

I wish all beer bottles were twist tops.

[Maegil]

Granted. A disgruntled cap opener industrialist puts a price on your head.

I wish this thread was a rope.

[Gwolfski]

Granted. Sadly, it snaps.

I wish for white strawberries

[NJW2000]

Granted, you lose all colour vision.

I wish for a film about me starring Johnny Depp.