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[Sl4cker]

Granted, but

I wish I wold dream of a vision of me meditating on an out-of-body-experience that I experienced through clairvoyant telepathy.

[Sosoku234]

Granted. You can see yourself. You consciousness is slowly drifting from your body, despite your attempts to wake up. You drift further and further and further. And further still until you reach oblivion.

I wish to see the rain coming down on a sunny day.

[Lenglon]

((You've never seen a rainbow before? That sucks.))
First it rains, and you get to see your rainbow. then it pours and you have to take shelter, then it's a titanic, endless deluge, and your shelter becomes overrun from the flash flooding on a cloudless day. Emergency services, just like everyone else, were not prepared.
You drown.

I wish I knew the origin of the phrase couldn't swing a cat without hitting something.

[UnicodingUnicorn]

Granted, you are given first hand experience to its origins with kittens. You are horribly scarred for life.

I wish to have a Panzer 2.

[Sosoku234]

Granted. You have one. It's missing the transmission, the turret ring is jammed, the firing mechanism is FUBAR, the lower glacis plate is riddled with many, many, many holes, the engine is only running at 10%, and you are sitting on almost exposed ammunition. Good luck and don't get ammo racked.

In counter of that last wish, I wish for a BT5. (Soviet racecar tank)

[NJW2000]

Granted, there is an angry soviet tank crew inside who wish to dispute ownership.

I wish for the secrets of life and death.

[Coolrune206]

You already know the secrets of life, so a bullet helps you discover the secrets of death.

I wish to enjoy my life.

[MoonyTheHuman]

you are suddenly brutally murdered as a baby

I wish for Urist to come kill me

[Sosoku234]

Granted. You are savagely beaten by Urist. However, you recover and are instead killed in some gang related violence.

I wish every wish was doubled.

[TheBiggerFish]

Granted, but only for your wish.  You get crushed under the resulting recursive doubling pile..

I wish for love.

[Sl4cker]

You get LOVE, the League Of Villainous Evil. You become a supervillian hated by all and thus are very lacking in the relationship department.

I wish I could type at 100 wpm.

[DAPARROT]

Granted, but you can't stop typing

I wish for my faith in humanity to be restored

[Sosoku234]

Granted. You look back at bay12 one last time, disgusted. You have lost faith in humanity.

I wish I had a better voice that could say some better words.

[Stirk]

Granted, however the woman you stole it from will get it back if she kisses her true love in three days. Your attempts to prevent this will likely get you stabbed.

I wish to have the planet Mars renamed after me.

[Insanegame27]

Granted, you put the official renaming of Mars to Stirk on your blog, and you lose all your followers who call you 'an utter nutcase'


I wish I had a gun just like the Fairchild Republic A-10 Thunderbolt II