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[Amperzand]

Granted. You are now very REASONABLE. The Inquisition has declared your chapter treasonous for refusing to commit EXTERMINATUS unnecessarily, and you have now been REASONABLY all executed.

I wish for a Battleship of the Imperium.

[TheBiggerFish]

Granted.   It's there to Exterminatus.

I wish that the Inquisition didn't execute Reasonable Marines.

[UnicodingUnicorn]

Granted, but they still execute Reasonable Space Marines.

I wish for a main battle tank.

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

Granted.  It's main weapon aimed at you.

I wish for Warhammer 40000 to enter the 42nd Millennium.

[Maegil]

Granted. The Necrons won.

I wish people were nicer to each other.

[UnicodingUnicorn]

Granted. but the net niceness increase is negligible.

I wish that I had all the baked beans I could ask for.

[Maegil]

Granted. They overfill you, jetting out of your every hole, and you suffocate with your lungs filled with baked beans.

I wish people had at least the average of buddhist monks' reasonableness.

[UnicodingUnicorn]

Granted, unfortunately the model buddhist monks in question were 969.

I wish for colour pencils.

[TheBiggerFish]

You get colored pencils, but they're all filled with normal pencil lead.


I wish that people wouldn't edit their wishes.  Maegil.

[Maegil]

See my edited sig 

I wish I weren't such a serial editor.

[TheBiggerFish]

Granted.  You lose all ability to edit.


I wish that I have wished a perfect wish with this wish.

[Amperzand]

Granted, the wish is utterly perfect. The sheer perfection of it summons the Chaos God of Order, all the way from the 42nd Millennium, who immediately proceeds to make this a very unpleasant place to live.

I wish for a free lunch.

[Sl4cker]

Granted. Cannibalism is very free.

I wish I could always see what will happen 10 seconds into the future.

[Stirk]

Granted. You can what will happen 10 seconds into the future-but only in a certain office building. All you can see ever see is what will happen 10 seconds in the future in this office building, effectively blinding you.

I wish to invent something that can regrow teeth teeth and restore lost hair with no side effects.

[Ultimuh]

Granted, you manage to invent a miracle cure for teeth and hair loss.
However someone else already patented it before you.


I wish to be the owner of said patent.