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[fillipk]

Granted, your sandwich is made out of: whole bread, your liver, your spleen, your left lung, lettuces, mustard, and mayo, Also the heavy wants your Sandvich.


I wish for my own privet universe, That only objects and creatures with invites could enter.

Granted, you get your own universe, and it is a privet, a type of bush, you can let anyone you want in but no one wants in.

I wish that I had a non-jackass genie

[heydude6]

Granted, emphasis on had...

[Megggas]

Granted.  You get nothing.  But also cancer.

I wish that my name had 4 G's instead of 3.

[crazyabe]

Granted, but Gratefully You have been cursed so you can only use Three G's for Each Gigameter you walk, and only that you walk, not bike, not drive, You must walk.

I wish for a new black suit.

[Megggas]

Granted.  Enjoy your new "black suit".  Hope it fits.


I wish that I was spiderman.

[thedrelle]

Granted. but You look just like this guy:


I wish I was invincible

[Magnumcannon]

Granted, but you have to use this suit to be invincible.


I wish for a cake.

[TheBiggerFish]

The cake is a lie.

I wish that the portal gun existed.

[crazyabe]

Granted, It is being tested in and "aperture Science Enrichment Center".


I wish I was In the "aperture Science Enrichment Center" and using the portal gun.

[Twinwolf]

Granted. You get to use it to fight an army of mantis men. Too bad that teleporting them only prolongs the inevitable.

I wish that Aperture Science didn't do stupid, pointless tests.

[Magnumcannon]

Granted, it turns into a military facility and helps the WWIII to happen. You're assigned to be a meatshield during the war.

I wish there was a language called "J". It only requires you to know the "J" letter.

[TheBiggerFish]

Granted, but you only KNOW the letter 'J' now.
And it's really obtuse.

I wish I had a decent wish to make.

[thedrelle]

Granted, But it takes you the rest of your life to make the wish, covering every contingency and possible loophole. Ultimately, you die with the very last word on your lips. the wish you wish for goes unwished.

I refuse to wish.

[heydude6]

Granted. You re-fuse your bisected corpse in order to make a wish. You regret it dearly.

I wish I had no regrets!

[Eric Blank]

Granted. At least you won't regret dying alone, unloved, probably a hated criminal, with everything to lose.

I wish my bed came pre-warmed.