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[BlitzDungeoneer]

Granted. They expect very unspecific things, but in large amounts instead.

I wish for more opinions on my SG.

[Arx]

Granted. Everyone thinks it sucks.

I wish for more fruit.

[Lyeos]

Granted, you get crushed by watermelons.

I wish for the Sun to go out.

[Tawa]

Granted. None of the presumable bad things  happen, though.

I wish my computer said "leopard" instead of "keyboard".

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Granted. Your keyboard transforms into a leopard. have fun with that.

I wish for even more wish corruptions.

[Lyeos]

Granted. As I gouge your eyes out with a spoon, I want you to remember that this is what you wished for. Oh, I know I removed your legs with a rusty cleaver, and drove spikes through your arms, but you just haven't gotten the point yet, so I'm going to continue. Next on the list is coating your abdomen with gasoline and setting it on fire a few times. Hope you're ready.

I wish for a watch.

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Granted. As I gouge your eyes out with a spoon, I want you to remember that this is what you wished for. Oh, I know I removed your legs with a rusty cleaver, and drove spikes through your arms, but you just haven't gotten the point yet, so I'm going to continue. Next on the list is coating your abdomen with gasoline and setting it on fire a few times. Hope you're ready.

I wish for a watch.

((...God, I need some brain bleach.))
Granted. It is made of magma, and eats brains. And it's on your hand.

I wish I had some brain bleach.

[Tawa]

Granted. You dump the entire bottle into  your eyes.

Who are you again, and why  are you blind?

I wish for Gizoogle.

[Shoruke]

Found it!

I wish for a cheezburger.

[WillowLuman]

I wish fo' a cold-ass lil cheezburger.

Granted, but yo can't handle dis much cheeseburger, biotch

I wish our phat asses didn't gotta gizoogle stuff

[Lyeos]

Granted, yo phat azzez ain't gotta Gizoogle shiznit, but yo hands do.

I wish fo' nuclea' warfare!

[Shoruke]

Granted, but the nuclear fallout gives you cancer instead of superpowers.

I wish fore people two no they're homonyms.

[WillowLuman]

Spoiler: Today's devlog, Gizoogled (click to show/hide)

06/24/2014 Toady One Truck truck truck. Havin some exposizzle issues... gots back from a assignment ta find mah leader had been beheaded, only I wasn't able ta figure dat up by rappin' ta playas (had ta git all up in legendz afterward). Was surprised ta find koboldz occupyin a set of dwarven hillocks... thought dat shiznit was a funky-ass bug yo, but dat shiznit was straight-up a legit bandit takeover from 20 muthafuckin years prior dat no muthafucka holla'd at mah crazy ass about. Walked tha fuck into another hill dwarf joint n' dem hoes was hustlin outta tha civic mound yellin bout a insurrection. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I strutted up in there n' tha mayor was by his dirty ass. I thought I'd help dem out, so I jabbed his ass up in tha head. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! One of tha fleein dwarves turned round n' beat me ta dirtnap. That'll teach me ta meddle up in internal affairs. In another game, I strutted up tha fuck into a market n' all tha humans n' goblins there was up in a giant brawl. I be thinkin dat flare-up was caused by suttin' up in they cultural pasts but I didn't figure it out. Sometimes you just wanna grab some muthafucka n' scream "what be happenin?!" but you can only ask bout certain thangs... a list which need ta be expanded even as they continue ta volunteer mo' shiznit.

Granted, itz 2 micronesian nations. Not tha collapse of society or a pimped out spectacle yo, but tha oceans is ruined
Granted, it be 4maskwolf an' his "bud."

I wish fo' a gmod epic

[Eric Blank]

Granted. After seeing only the first ten minutes of it, you want to vomit.

I wish for fewer ticks trying to suck my blood.

[jaxy15]

Granted. You get more mosquitoes trying to suck your blood. Many more mosquitoes.

I wish I didn't have eyes.