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[Worldmaster27]

Granted. The devs think 'awesome' means adding more pointless loot and not Z levels.

I wish for Cataclysm 2.

[Lyeos]

Granted, it has better graphics, fewer enemies, and still no more Z levels.

I wish for more actual construction to be doable in Cataclysm.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. Unfortunately, it requires the implementation of Z levels to be complete.

I wish I was a faster reader.

[Lyeos]

Granted, you can read one more letter per minute, but lose the ability to run.

I wish I would say something sig-worthy.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. It gets thrown into a sigtext wall.

I wish to be the God-Emporer-of-Mankind.

[Comrade Shamrock]

Granted, but the chaos gods took over everything except the throne room now you are the God-Emperor-of-yourself and the only other person in the room at the time.

I wish for three billion euro which not stolen, not counterfeit, not going to be destroyed, not poisonous, not for monopoly or another board game, not lost/hidden, not drugged, not teleporting or only obtainable in the past/future but I get it today nor will it be stolen, lost, hidden, forgotten, in small notes, be cut up in small pieces, be humongous or a really any peculiar size, be implicated in a fraud scam, suffocate or otherwise kill me and I have no debts to pay off.

[Lyeos]

Granted, someone shoots you because they want it. However, they are immediately arrested, and your cash is buried with you so you will always have it. Hoho.

I wish for more ridiculously specific wishes.

[nomoetoe]

Granted, I make a ridiculously specific FABULOUS rainbow magic wish that is so unbelievably ridiculous that toady pukes rainbows everywhere destroying the entire freaking multiverse.

I wish for transmogrification central.

[Comrade Shamrock]

Granted and it spontaneously explodes

I wish Lyeos fell down a well into a pool of really deep water in the middle of a forest no one but he can find wearing strong unbreakable, uncorrodable chains strapped to him, causing him to sink and secured via a unbreakable, uncorrodable padlock that cannot be picked for he has no experience and no tools and will not open through luck or any other event and Lyeos does not grow taller to escape drowning, does not develop water breathing and does not find an air pocket or breathing apparatus nor is he saved by any magical, mundane or extraterrestrial life and drowns and is not resurrected into any form of life and is not brought back as any kind of unlife like a zombie, vampire, ghost etc and is not brought back as any kind of robot or cyborg and he drowns.

(Vengeance is sweet, but soon to be spoiled)

[Lyeos]

Granted. He drowns, is rescued by a robot(Let's face it, robots are pretty darn cool and unusual) made on this planet, then is resuscitated by that same robot, as it happens to be a trained medical professional. All of this assuming you ignore the fact that Lyeos is a Lich, and was likely just pretending to be dead. He's after you, now.

I wish people wouldn't take things so personally.

[Comrade Shamrock]

Granted, people lose all drive and ambition and die in their beds because they weren't committed to getting up and living

I wish I had the power to conquer the world.

[nomoetoe]

Granted, you have the power to take over the world but to rule it you must destroy the Canadians with a drum stick named larry.

I wish to play a game, its rules are simple, the first rule is no. the second rule is the game is over and I win. :3

[Comrade Shamrock]

Granted, you press play and wait one hundred years until you win.

I wish Dwarf Fortress had a easy to use UI

[Lyeos]

Granted, it already does. Keheheheh.

I wish I could stop listening to a song I'm currently listening to for the fifth time today.

[Roc CURIOUSBEAST_EATER]

(removed)