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[WillowLuman]

Granted, he isn't depressed though, so you wasted your wish! He's already explained that he's just stating facts!

Granted, but he's only the Designated Villain. He isn't really that scary.

Spoiler: What ought to be the poster (click to show/hide)

Granted. It's because THEY consider your mental state a funny game. THEY are out to get you...

I wish for a something to do.

[Lyeos]

Granted, you get to be a homicide victim. That's what you get to do!

I wish everyone would get enough sleep!

[~Neri]

Granted, I'm actually about to go to sleep right now. Like literally right now.

I wish for no more rapid fingernail growth tonight.

[hops]

Granted. They continue growing rapidly the next night, resulting in [INCIDENT 65-A "ACKBAR": DATA EXPUNGED]

I wish that the SCP foundation was real.

[blazing glory]

Granted,that means that the SCP's are real as well,there's a keter class one in your area right now.

I wish some dinner.

[Lyeos]

Granted. Not only did you murder HugoLuman, you're now eating his legs. You monster!

I wish for more continuity.

[Eric Blank]

Granted. Life continues as normal. It makes no fucking sense.

I wish for all to be safe and happy

[hops]

Granted. Robots take over humanity to protect us from ourselves.

I wish for an orange.

[smurfingtonthethird]

Granted, it's really fucking annoying.

I wish for everything in my life to be perfect for me.

[blazing glory]

Granted,everything is made out of potatoes with cheese inside.

I wish I understood smurfingtonthethird's obsession with potatoes and cheese.

[hops]

Granted. You commit suicide later because nothing is every cheese and potato enough for you any more.

I wish to be able to afford everything.

[Arx]

Granted. Inflation happens! You can no longer afford anything.

I wish for a working heater.

[JackOSpades]

 Granted, your heater works perfectly as a paper weight or possibly a fan but it's use in regards to providing Heat is questionable at best. (what you said you wanted a working heater you never specified what work you wanted that heater to do.)

I wish I could turn down the thermostat for the outdoors it's more like an oven setting over here.

[hops]

Granted. You accidentally breaks the thermostat and it gets stuck at absolute zero.

I wish I was a more interesting person.

[JackOSpades]

 Granted, you receive the title of most interesting person in the world, but your official duties soon cause your Liver to give out as you were never up to the challenge and you die from Alcohol poisoning.

I wish that obvious grammar mistake didn't pain me as much as it does.