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[TD1]

Granted. They nest in your skull.

I wish HugoLuman was a Targaryen.

[Trapezohedron]

Granted. He dies almost immediately after a complicated political plot was discovered.

I wish I was not immortal.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. You die the instant your immortality is removed.

I wish I was the number 9.

[Lyeos]

Granted, as you already aren't, this means you must want to die! A horde of angry foxes eats you.

Granted. You're a giant stone 9! Pigeons poop on you all day and you can never move.

I. Wish. For. Foxes.

[Tawa]

Granted. You become re-immortal soon afterwards, and decide to call everyone a kneebiter.

Granted. You become 81 soon afterwards.

Granted. You also become Kevak.

I wish to be Gandalf.

[~Neri]

Granted.

I wish for foxes!

((Yay fox buddies!))

[Trapezohedron]

You get the corpse of Louisa Rose Allen.

I wish I stopped killing people for wishes.

[jaxy15]

Granted. You beat them to near death instead.

I wish for an army of clowns.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. Since you killed everyone, you have no more people to kill. Thus, this stops you from killing people with your wishes.

Granted. They kill all your dwarves.

I wish New Guy was actually new.

[WillowLuman]

Granted. He's a fetus.

I wish for Cards Against Humanity, with special Bay12 cards.

[Tawa]

Granted. They are demons who send you to Fell, the Fox Underworld.

Granted. You kidnap them and torture them instead.

Granted. He changes his name to Old Guy.

Granted. The cards are condoms.

I wish for a reclining chair.

[Lyeos]

Granted. It reclines over a cliff when you sit on it.

I wish more people in the upper boards feared me.

[TD1]

Granted. You die to stop.
Granted. Em. Corruption obvious? Clowns devour world. Logic is satisfied.
Granted. He's so green he's a vegetable.
Granted. You get them, and they come alive, killing you and your family in your sleep.
Should I be prepared to score this one through too...? Time to press post!
DAMMIT
Granted. They fear you so much a world-wide search is launched. When found, you are destroyed.

I wish I was Gandalf! With a good staff! And beard! And for some reason, Matrim Cauthon is my best friend!

[Tawa]

Granted. You become a god among the upperboarders and move there forever.

Granted. You're now me. I am you.

I wish for Lie Egg Ohs.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. The Bay12 cards have the same effect as Cthulhu's presence.
Granted. It only reclines forwards, and crushes you.
Granted. They fear you and set up a resistance against you. They then assassinate you in your sleep.
Granted. This all happens at the end of the books, and you don't get to have that stuff for very long.
Granted. Oh, you want Eggs to Lie? Okay. The eggs say they like you.

I wish Cthulhu was real.
I wish for friendly ninjas.