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[Tawa]

Granted. You are forced into taking a drug that puts you in a coma, conserving 38.9164816491756136590175... seconds' worth of energy.

I wish for Spock.

[RAM]

Well you can't have it. *sulks*

[Lyeos]

Granted. You are forced into taking a drug that puts you in a coma, conserving 38.9164816491756136590175... seconds' worth of energy.

I wish for Spock.

Granted. You get a dead Spock.

I wish the above guy had made a wish for me to corrupt.

[WillowLuman]

Granted. RAM wished for you to have a happy life.

I wish my framerate was better.

[Tawa]

Granted. You now move at quintuple framerate and everyone is freaked out by your over-animation, you Peter Jackson film you.

I wish for random numbers.

[JackOSpades]

 granted you get random numbers and as a bonus letters as well because you are now a bingo machine at your local senior center.

I wish for all the wishes wished by people with no wish listed.

[IronTomato]

Granted. They're from people who had no wishes, therefore you get nothing. You lose.

I wish .

[Tawa]

Granted.

I wish for sorcery.

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Granted. You are unable to control it, and it lashes out at random people.

I wish I had a magical cat.

[Shoruke]

Granted. Unfortunately you are now Sailor Moon and thus very stupid, but all of the villains have guns.

I wish my existing cats could speak English.

[Worldmaster27]

Granted. All of your cats can speak a bit of English. Curses, mostly.

I wish for Internets.

[Playergamer]

Granted. Thanks to you stealing the internet, it is permanently down. Hundreds die in the first few days. Greedy jerk.

I wish I was better at CSGO.

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Granted. None of them actually do anything.

I wish I had a cool hat.

[nomoetoe]

Granted, however any location you go to will be devoid of life, and all life within 20 miles of you will cease to exist, Anyone you try to contact whether it be by phone, computer, walkie talkie, or any other device to contact any and all life will instantly die. so you will be forever alone.

I wish toady one the great would grow a big sexy mustache.

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Granted. It is sentient, and kills him, before taking his body over. It knows nothing of programming.

I wish I was a Dorf.