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[Lyeos]

Granted. Every day, you are told that DF2014 will be released tomorrow. Toady even does a really good job at convincing you that it's true - but always, from now until the day you die  the next version of Dwarf Fortress will be released "tomorrow".

I wish for the next wish to involve flying elephants.

[Lord_lemonpie]

Granted. There are now flying elephants in your country. However, they are undead, and violently eat you and your family

I wish i wasnt bored to death

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Granted. You are stabbed to death instead.

I wish Minecraft and Dwarf Fortress combined into one game.

[Tawa]

Granted. As pathogens are single-celled organisms and were likely our ancestors at one point or another, you were never around to make the wish and the wish was never made.

I wish for a toy car that you start by pulling a string.

[Eric Blank]

Granted. Overjoyed, because it's a really awesome toy car, you pull the string too hard and get a blister. It becomes infected and you die.

I wish there were gold in the hills.

[nomoetoe]

Granted, there is now gold in every hill on earth, many wars are caused when people start fighting over the large amounts of gold, hundreds of millions of people, eventually its all mined and its value drops to that of granite.

I wish HugoLumans eye sockets would recover faster.

[blazing glory]

Granted,but Descans start flooding out of his nose starting the whole process all over again.

I wish these Descanites would disappear faster.

[Shoruke]

A black hole spontaneously appears, engulfing and destroying them instantly, along with the rest of Earth.

I don't know what Descans and Descanites and HugoLumanses are, so I wish people would stop making wishes about them 

[blazing glory]

Granted,Descan never existed,everyone's happy.

I wish games didn't get worse as technolegy advances.

[Shoruke]

Granted. Unfortunately, technology no longer advances, and so the video games stays in its current state with lots of mediocrity and lots of overpriced crap and the occasional gem, in perpetuity.

I wish to have a Prinny servant.

[WillowLuman]

Granted, (google) but you cannot have one as your avatar at the same time.

I wish I could be a bird for a day.

[blazing glory]

This is a Descan,it is a avatar used by User Descan.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Horrible creature.

These are Descanites

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

They are avatars used by users with their previous avatar's head pasted on.

This is a Hugoluman.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Over the previous days he has been modifying his picture starting with Descans flooding out of his eyes and ending with a eye cover,he seems to have changed it back to normal though.

[Tawa]

Granted, (google) but you cannot have one as your avatar at the same time.

I wish I could be a bird for a day.

Granted. You are a penguin who never learned to swim. It also lives on a planet almost, but not quite, entirely unlike Uranus; this planet is much like Earth except for its yearlong days.

I wish I didn't have to do the dishes.

[jaxy15]

Granted. You now have to do everything else around the house. And only you.

I wish for a pet bear that won't injure or eat me.

[Tawa]

Granted. It is also your mother. _^Lolmomjokes

I wish for a can of Coke. No drug jokes guys.