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[Tawa]

Granted. You trade your lungs for them. Enjoy being the focus of a horror film.

I wish I had ardently thuggish gifts.

[Erils]

Granted. Your gifts beat you up and take your money before you can open them.

I wish I knew how to save a life.

[WillowLuman]

Granted. Thank you for completing med school, please repay your student loans in the next 6 weeks.

I wish I got this paper done last night.

[Erils]

Granted. Too bad is was due yesterday.

I wish I didn't have the urge to leapfrog-post.

[Tawa]

Granted. You now have the urge to piggyback-post.

I wish that there was a factory in the Feywild that made elves.

[My Name is Immaterial]

Granted. It makes statues of elves.

I wish that this class was over.

[WillowLuman]

Granted. Sudden terrorist attack on campus. Get out of there!

I wish for you to read all subsequent posts in this thread in the voice of Morgan Freeman.

[My Name is Immaterial]

Justin Bieber was named Morgan Freeman, and Morgan Freeman was named Justin Bieber. So now you must all sing these posts to the tune of "Baby".

I wish that Bieber would be deported.

[WillowLuman]

Granted. Canada strips his citizenship and formally deports him to this country.

I wish for Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 to be found with all passengers and crew OK.

[smurfingtonthethird]

Granted, but they die shortly afterward because the plane explodes.

I wish for lode's a money

[Tawa]

Granted. You make a lucrative business out of selling lodestones. However, a nethack developer arrives and renames them loadstones just as you pick one up. They are all cursed.

I wish for a vorpal sword and to not be a jabberwock. If the second part cannot be processed then the first part is cancelled, thank you very much.

[WillowLuman]

Granted, but you must learn how to galumph to get it.

I wish I didn't have to write about 24.

[Tawa]

Granted. You must now write about the year 2015.

I wish for a metric ton of whatever

Spoiler: this guy (click to show/hide)

my zeh ultimate dream. c;

I was at home in my attic with some humanoids I know and we were talking, at some point a shadow woman came over and searched deep within my mind, I warned her that she really shouldn't do that but she kept searching farther within eventually she found out that I was some dark ancient being that was nearly invulnerable and even if my physical body was destroyed I could easily recover.

I was now in a library and I was talking to someone I knew in a weird language sounded like growling while gurgling shards of glass, I dont remember much of that part. ;'c

I was now in a church, me and some humanoids did some stuff and I used my abilities to entertain them, but some soldiers attacked, I quickly killed them. We didn't seem bothered by the soldiers being evaporated and watched some TV, we started watching the news and they were talking about me, they apparently discovered my existence and were were arming themselves to kill me.

Later on I went outside I was outside and hundreds of jets came after me, they were using some kind of rare purple substance that could hurt me. My body was nearly destroyed at one point but I got mad and started teleporting onto the jets and threw them so hard that the g forces caused them to explode.

I was then with a bunch of adolescent humanoids and I was changing how I looked so that I could hide from the people after me, I took on the form of a human female so the peoples would have a harder time finding me. (I was very adorable C:)

I went to a restaurant with an acquaintance and the jets shot at me a few times but then flew off, I went inside and one of the employes asked if they had seen me, I told them I hadn't and ordered my food. I woke up and quickly fell back asleep.

I was male again and I found out someone was planning to capture someone I was fond of, so I flewported far away (to another dimension?) and I was now in a city full of sentient ponies, I went to a motel and found something at the end of a every darkening hallway. I heard a beast further within and decided to leave.

I went back to my home dimension and with some humanoids and the one im fond of and some soldier woman in armour grabbed the one i'm fond of and took her away. I was enraged at this point and decided to take on my female disguise again. I was then for some reason in walmart trying on a dress in the bathroom which was stuffed full of other woman also trying on clothes, I woke up the end.

is smoking.

[Erils]

Granted. You now have the urge to piggyback-post.

I'm pretty sure I used that corruption already somewhere in this thread. Is this supposed to be poetic justice?

[Tawa]

Yes.