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[IronTomato]

Granted. You sure have fixed up the little thing... It now works as a fully functional ballpoint pen, and without the unsafe, sharp shape that it used to have!

I wish I knew CQC like Solid Snake.

[JackOSpades]

granted, you are now brain damaged and you believe you can hide in a cardboard box, everyone humors you and pretends to die while you "sneak" around pretending to be on a super secret mission.

I wish to join a super team with my new superpowers.

[IronTomato]

Granted. You are now brain damaged from the molten metal penetrating your skull and believe that you have superhero, and all the villains humor you and pretend to be defeated while you "fight crime" with your super friends.

 

I wish for a toad.

[JackOSpades]

granted, you get one of the mushroom people from the Super Mario games, he's not much to look at but he sure is a Fun Guy.
Nintendo sues you...

I wish for less frivolous litigation.

[wer6]

Granted, but its the hypno-ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNO TOOOADDD
ninjad
Granted but the hypnotoad steals it- ALLL GLORY TO THE HYPNO TOAD.


I wish for ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNO TOAD.

[WillowLuman]

ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNO TOAD

I wish the HYPNO TOAD wouldn't make me kill myself.

[JackOSpades]

Granted, It makes you kill others who try to stop it's glorious rise to world domination.

I wish bngfbgnfgbnfgnbgnfghjtyjhmsfdl.

[IronTomato]

Granted. Instead it is grtgergergrgeregergergergerg.

I wish for a pick axe.

[JackOSpades]

granted, your captain tells you to pick an axe already the hoard is almost upon you.

I wish for some Aspirin.

[Erils]

Granted but you don't have a headache.

I wish that I (the cat) had a stuffed animal or toy to play with.

[JackOSpades]

granted, it's a Chucky Doll and he wants to "play" with you.

I wish for something completely random.

[Erils]

Granted. You get a larch tree.

I wish that I (the cat) could defeat chucky.

[JackOSpades]

granted, you can defeat Chucky but not Freddie Kruger who stalks you in your dreams.

I wish for a particle accelerator.

[WillowLuman]

Granted, but you don't get access to the powerplant required to run it.

I, too wish for a fully-powered particle accelerator, that doesn't make black holes or anything stupid like that because particle accelerators can't actually do that.

[IronTomato]

Granted. You get a machine that dramatically increases the acceleration of your own particles, you fly through the air a few miles, and hit the ground at high velocity.

I wish for wings.