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[Remuthra]

See? That's not a corruption of his wish. That's more or less fulfilling it as intended. A better one would have been "No one dies, since all of humanity is mad or non innocent."

The original wish was for demons to kill everyone except the madmen, so they could roam free. Satirizing the typos, everything is destroyed except Rome, and the madmen and demons too are off messing about somewhere. It's more subtle than the Nobody Dies answer.

[RAM]

You should have done something about the toos too...

You have a giant pulsating ultrabrain, it likes to sit on your lap and fetch non-euclidian representations of real objects. Sadly it was hit by a car and now just sits in its bucket drooling.

I wish that all pets were immune to accidental injury.

[WillowLuman]

Granted. This allows them to still be alive when the endangered mutant eagles need prey, that they kill on purpose. Thank you for sacrificing for the environment!

I wish for a rare mutant eagle.

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Granted! You get a super-rare mutant eagle! Looks kinda like a dog though...

I wish for the players to be removed from MMOs massive multiplayer online games.

[RAM]

Massive Multi-online games are so massively online in so many ways that the internet grinds to a halt. The spammers, with their new-found proclivities and no outlet assault all other media mediums until all contact with the outside world consists purely of unsolicited advertisements.

I wish that people would only be willing to kill and/or die for concepts that they could clearly and objectively define.

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Granted. Epistemological thinking renders the world a place of cowards & maimings. Oh, and delusional schizophrenics rule us with a murder-capable iron fist.

I wish for a special someone.

[Playergamer]

Granted. The person is "special" in their head. Also, they have a gun. You do not survive.

I wish for my name to not be so stupid anymore

[Komra]

Granted. Your name gains supernomenic intelligence and takes over the world's nuclear powers with its vast intellectual abilities.

I wish that I had a faster internet connection.

[Atomicdremora]

Your router runs away.

I wish I wasn't blue.

[RAM]

You are no longer cleaned as you are flushed.

I wish for a career as an inter-galactic transport engineer.

[WillowLuman]

Granted. It's pretty dull, and your sedentary job at a comms/control console in zero gravity makes you depressingly overweight.

I wish for the Nile.

[RAM]

Here is a funnel, you will be taking it orally, we will start with the crocodiles...

I wish that geography didn't exist.

[WillowLuman]

Granted. The earth's crust melts.

I wish for the best corruption Ever.

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Granted. But first you have to make the best wish ever.

I wish for some crazy awesome contact lenses.

[Komra]

Granted. Said contacts are so cool that they are required to wear sunglasses. Have fun seeing anything at night!

I wish for an FTL drive.