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[rabidgam3r]

Granted. However, Dota shuts down the following day.

[Jellycat12]

Granted. You implode.

I wish for an acrobat monkey.

[rabidgam3r]

Granted. It eats some poisoned dates and dies.

I wish for a fatal heart attack.

[Jellycat12]

Granted. You die and go to hell. It is tailor made to be as horrible as possible to you.

I wish to be an Immortal.

[rabidgam3r]

Granted. You are immortal, but you watch as family and friends wither away, creating a perpetual And i Must Scream moment.

[misko27]

Ohhhhhhhh, I wish I was in Dixie, hooray! Hooray!

[Jellycat12]

Granted. Dixie explodes soon after.

I wish for the words 'splork' and 'wish' to be interchangeable.

[rabidgam3r]

Granted. However, saying either Splork or Wish would result in you imploding.

I wish to be in total control of my wishes, invulnerable, and shoot LAZARZ FROM MAH EYEZ

[Jellycat12]

Granted. However, you just have the free trial. Hope you like your one week of power! (Only $9.99999999 for the permanent pack!)

I request the ability to come back from the dead.

[misko27]

Your request has been processed, and you will reccieve a answer in 6-8 weeks. (12 weeks later: "Granted. You come back as a kobold. I hope you enjoy being a utter weakling and being dissected."
 
I wish for a 20 dollar bill.

[javierpwn]

Your 20 dollar bill is counterfeit

I wish for GMs to update regularly(instead of random times)

[Jellycat12]

Granted. They all update every five seconds.

I wish for wings.

[javierpwn]

Your wings are made of lead

I wish I could make decent wishes

[rabidgam3r]

Granted, but they are corrupted.


I wish to be reincarnated endlessly in the world of DF

[Jellycat12]

Granted. Each time you come back, you die before you can do much.

I wish for the ability to transform.