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[IamanElfCollaborator]

Granted, but it still falls on your head and kills you.

I wish dwarves were even more stupid.

[Blizzlord]

Granted. It does not change the outcome of the previous wish. Getting crushed by candle production must be satisfying.
Granted. The total lack of intelligence makes them forget how to hold a pickaxe.

I wish I knew how it feels to have a chandlery crush you without having it happen to me.

[pisskop]

Granted.  A stand-in double falls on you instead.

I wish all the females in my department were more attractive...  Two are decent, but the rest are kinda squishy.

[tomio175]

They are now more attractive. In physics, not in real life. They just became FAT.

I wish for a moon.

[kaijyuu]

Granted. You may view it most clear nights by just looking up at the sky.


I wish for a hug.

[IamanElfCollaborator]

Granted, you are hugged by Slenderman. You vanish into the mist as another unreported death.

I wish for more lemons that are explosive, burn my house down, acidic, etc.

[Wrex]

Granted, you now have a glass of Cave Johnson's Flaming Lemonade.

I wish to not look almost exactly like Hanslanda D:

[tomio175]

Granted, you now look more like an Oxygen atom.

I wish for a waffle that is NOT blue. Or any other, abnormal (for me) color.

[Blizzlord]

Granted. The thing granting the wish misinterpreted your intention, so here is a silicon wafer.

I wish for an adamantine wafer.

[Ultimuh]

Granted.
The waffle will be found somewhere in the next test chamber.
Go on in, I insist.


I wish I had infinite tests and test subjects at my disposal.

[xelada]

You make a zombie... and it bites you.

I wish whomever grants this wish wishes for something easily doable.

[GreatWyrmGold]

Granted. You can't figure it out and are laughed out of the genie profession.

I wish that I understood my brother.

[xelada]

Due to you not being neuro-typical you lack the naturally occurring brotherly solidarity, and he can't align his mind with yours.

I wish I had mid rate disabled student allowance instead of the low rate.

[GreatWyrmGold]

I think that my brother being non-neuro-typical is more likely...

Granted. You invest the spare money and become rich enough that your significant other or other loved one is kidnapped and held for ransom.

I wish my brother was sane.

[tomio175]

Your brother already is. It's been you that is insane, and you are quickly sent to an asylum for the rest of your days. Which will end painfully, because of a failed lobotomy, WITHOUT anesthesia....

I wish GWG was a waffle.