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[Hanslanda]

You get a pie with pie flavour. it tastes like pastry and nothing else.

it also has some polonium in it, so you die.

I wish my computer had more 6 GB of RAM rather than 2 GB

Granted, but its physical frame cannot handle this magical power, and it instantly overclocks and is set aflame. Your fire extinguisher is old and does not work.

I wish that this wish could not be corrupted.
>.>
<.<

[Ultimuh]

You get a pie with pie flavour. it tastes like pastry and nothing else.

it also has some polonium in it, so you die.

I wish my computer had more 6 GB of RAM rather than 2 GB

Granted, but its physical frame cannot handle this magical power, and it instantly overclocks and is set aflame. Your fire extinguisher is old and does not work.

I wish that this wish could not be corrupted.
>.>
<.<

Granted, it's ignored.

I wish people would stop being so uncreative with their wishes.

[Spinal_Taper]

Granted, now they're so creative and out there they're completely incomprehensible.

I wish I kicked ass at writing.

[Hanslanda]

Granted, now every time you write, you must be kicking ass at the same time.

I wish that physics were reversed once every ten seconds, ad infinitum.

[Techhead]

Granted. Since the laws of physics (barring the weak force) are time reversible, the universe simply plays and rewinds the same 10 seconds. However, the weak force causes radioactive decay to slowly introduce errors into the wind/rewind, and the entire system falls apart into chaos.

(Disclamer: I am not a physicist. The science above is at best grossly inaccurate.)

I wish I was a physicist.

[crazysheep]

Granted. However since the Higgs Boson has been discovered, most of the physicists are now out of jobs, and you are one of these newly unemployed physicists.

I wish for cold fusion to be a reality.

[Lagslayer]

Granted. It requires so little input, in fact, that any temperature above 1ēK causes any particle in the universe to undergo fusion. Also, you got a subpoena to appear in physics court.

I wish I could see thought bubbles in real life.

[Blizzlord]

Granted. They only show an abstract and completely uninterpretative diagram over neural activity in the brain.

I wish for people to completely understand the motives of the person they are communicating with.

[Techhead]

Granted. Now every day is TMI Tuesday.

I wish my N key worked properly.

[Sprin]

mr gene has granted this but ever time you hit N it comes out NNNNNNN.

I wish to have a fortress last 1000 years on my baddassery!!

[xelada]

You get locked out after the first day.

I wish that I could spend as long as I like online with no negative repercussions.

[Devling]

Okay. You can but why would you? There is a whole world out there man!

I wish for a nice cool soda.

[Trapezohedron]

You get a can of Cool Soda(tm).

Unfortunately, it does not contain anything. May you find something to drink in this forsaken desert.

I wish for a wish of peace.

[Devling]

Death is VERY peaceful!
(It feels like a desert, I swear Oregon's supposed to be rainy)

I wish for a robot.

[Blizzlord]

Granted. It fires its death ray at you, transforming you into a amorphous glob.

I wish I won the grand prize in the superpower lottery.