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[Techhead]

Granted. Trepanning your skull and pouring bleach in the hole is a really bad idea. You die.

I wish for a Planetside 2 beta key.

[jaxy15]

Granted. It's wrong.

I wish for more Legend of Korra episodes.

[Blizzlord]

Granted. The animators and storyboard writers had a heart attack and a team of incompetent hobos transform it into something not worth watching.

I wish for a wider monitor.

[Techhead]

Granted. Your monitor is now 3 times as wide, but also 3 times as tall. Enjoy your new aspect ratio of 1:12 (assuming 4:3 original resolution).

I wish I had better teeth.

[sayaks]

Edit: silly ninja
Granted Your teeth are now better because all your bad teeth are gone.

I wish for my pc to be better than any other pc in this world.

[Evilsx]

Granted, that new pc blown up at the first moment you start it up and you think real life a game(Or is it...)

I wish that Nyan cat was never created.

[Lagslayer]

Granted. Fiesta Dog now reigns supreme.

I wish for the end of the universe.

[X-03]

Granted, however, it is merely a boundary marked "END" that loops you back to Earth when you go past it. Into the core, no less.

I wish that I was the owner of Soul Edge (from the Soul Calibur series, to those who live under a Mars) and could reap souls!

[Blizzlord]

Granted. Too bad nobody is alive on the planet you inhabit.

I wish I got motivated to make art and create music.

[Devling]

With an iron will, you set about making the worst art ever.

I wish for everybody to have cancer.

[Lagslayer]

Granted, but now you also have cancer. In the d***. You have d*** cancer. It is surgically removed, but your insurance won't cover it, so you can't afford anesthesia.

I wish I wish this wish.

[adasdad]

granted.


I wish that "granted" was a better response.

[Blizzlord]

Agreed. Nobody uses it anymore.

I wish my mind was like that of the Pyro.

[X-03]

Granted. However, said weekend, a virus is released, destroying all computers connected to the internet in the world, Armageddon decides to happen, and you are kept in for janitorial duty at the Asylum, regardless of what your job is. Right after you finally finish, an assassin stabs you in the back for no real reason and everybody spits on your dead body.

I wish that I was able to turn people insane and create chaos just by saying the phrase, "You know what would really be good? If you listened to me."

[Lagslayer]

Granted, but you also make yourself go insane and create chaos. You use your new found chaotic identity to streak naked through the streets, marking your territory, and pretending to be Justin Bieber.

I wish for a weapon to fight the oncoming robot overlords.