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[Zako]

Wish granted, sticky notes spray out of your hands! They keep spraying out uncontrollably and you drown in a ocean of sticky notes. Not nice.

I wish for anything I imagine can come true at what ever time I want it to!

[Makrond]

That's odd, I could have sworn I made a wish last time... it said, "I wish, I wish, I hadn't killed that fish."

Anyway,

Granted. During a long session of Dwarf Fortress, you try to imagine what tentacle monsters would look like, and then one appears beside you. Your head is smashed into your body, an unrecognisable mass!

I wish I had a computer so awesomely powerful it could play top-end games at the highest quality settings that come out for the rest of my lifetime. Also, an internet connection so fast, every server I join starts measuring its latency against me. Hehehe...

[muwahahaha]

Dammit Makrond, you beat me by like 4 seconds, I had just hit post as you posted and it came up with 'a new reply ahs been posted'.

Moving on,

Granted, you get murdered by an insane nerd who went beserk after learning that your set up was more 1337 than his. He steals your PC and uses it for himself, then 4 days later the Pentium #652220482 10core is released and some net company invents the T50000000 connection, rendering your stuff obsolete.

I wish for a third world war that reduces the population of the world drastically (e.g by BOMBING the poor African countries rather than sending them money. You can't have poor living conditions if you don't live) However, the entirety of Australia, and therefore myself and all my loved ones are safe, since we never leave the country.

[Pitchblack]

Granted. The united nations votes to release a bomb on africa that is dangerously experimental and thus not tested. The bomb destroys 99% of the population with no fallout and thus the population problem is dealt with. Sadly the 1% left are infected with a highly communicable form of a disease that reanimates the dead, and so without knowledge of this they spread it to the far reaches of the world. Australia closes its borders, but the zombies spread to the animal population and infect your people. (thus ending the human race)

I wish that the post button for whomever replys to this releases a virus into his/her computer, causing a overheating/meltdown of your hardware.

[qwertyuiopas]

Granted, but the virus gets the IP wrong and infects bill gates' computer.

I wish that all macs would die a horrible painful virusy death...
Except for the ones that have recently run DF.

[LeoLeonardoIII]

Granted. But they re-animate as zombie computers and start biting wallabies and kangaroos in Australia, eventually spreading the virus to the humans there. Australia closes its borders and shuts down its shipyards and airports. The virus eventually dies out there after killing everyone inside.

I wish my wisdom teeth would just disappear out of my jaw so I wouldn't have to pay someone $3000 to pull them out.

[Zako]

Wish granted, your wisdom teeth disappear from your jaw completely, as if by magic! But due to bad mouth hygene, the dentist needs to remove the rest of your teeth, and he just ran out of anasthetic...

I wish for a million dollars to be donated to the poor by Bill Gates.

[Peewee]

Granted. But he donates one dollar to a million people. AND YOU'RE NOT ONE OF THEM!

I wish I owned Google's domain name.

[Zako]

Wish granted, your domain name is now called Google, but you are sent hate mail for why you aren't working properly. You are eventually sent multiple viruses and they transfer all your money in your bank account to another persons.

I wish for the ultimate experience in wheeled transport!

[Nilocy]

Granted, you are on a roller coaster and it has a mechanical fault, your stuck upside down on the top of a loop de loop. Your face explodes from the blood preassure in your face.

I wish everything in theme parks were free.

[Zako]

Wish granted, everything in theme parks are free! But only in your mind.

I wish that I could control people's minds!

[LeoLeonardoIII]

Granted. But the only way you can control their minds is in making them dislike you. You cannot make them like you, or think different things, or make them do things. Your one and only power is to make them like you less. Enjoy.

I wish this thread would hit 101 pages!!

[Floirt]

Granted. A thread hanging out of your T-Shirt hits 101 pages of the book you are reading.

I wish for pirinjas (pirates + ninjas!).

[Nilocy]

Granted, but there was a mix up in the wishing office, you get some Zombots. (Zombies + Robots).

I wish MAD would happen.

[PTTG??]

Granted, but there was a mix up in the wishing office, you get some Zombots. (Zombies + Robots).

I wish MAD would happen.

You are killed by feuding black and white spies.

I wish I could make CAT5 cables with my mind.