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[Sirus]

Granted. You die from the insane amount of toxic substances present in the cake.

I wish my throat would stop hurting.

[Skyrunner]

Granted. Now you are a terminator and don't hurt. Instead, you help Skynet meret GlaDOS and take over the world.

I wish my avatar WAS SEEN AS A GIRL, DAMMIT! D:

[Sirus]

Your avatar now says "A GIRL, DAMMIT D:"...in 1/2pt font.

I wish to escape with the Companion Cube.

[Skyrunner]

You do, but now you dehydrate to death on a huge wheatfield, a mile away from a stream.
That's how you live the rest of your short, sad life ):


I wish I could sleep for 6hours/day and not fall asleep in first period.

[Trapezohedron]

Granted, but somehow, you also picked up a manual on how to lucid dream. Upon sleeping, you discover that you're stuck in what seems to be limbo for an unknown amount of time. You eventually forgot that you simply wanted to sleep for six hours per day and not feel sleepy at all.

I wish for a BLT sandwich.

[Flying Dice]

I wish my avatar WAS SEEN AS A GIRL, DAMMIT! D:

People have trouble noticing that? 
__________________________________________


Granted. You now have a blue lemming and tartar sauce sandwich.



I wish I could figure out where these goddamn fruit flies keep coming from.

[Sirus]

You discover that the fruit flies are hatching out of your skin.

I wish I were immune to harmful radiation.

[Trapezohedron]

Granted. You are immune to harmful radiation. However, you have mutated to the point where oxygen can kill you if you expose yourself to it in 3 minutes. Naturally, living above ground where there's a ton of oxygen whizzing past you and whatever, you die.

I wish I could somehow manage to allow both Equivalent Exchange and Flan's mod to work together.

[jaxy15]

Granted. The two mods become attracted to each other after working together and start going out, leaving you with vanilla minecraft.

I wish for more pringles.

[kaijyuu]

You get a bag of Fringles.



I wish for a large cheese pizza.

[Flying Dice]

Granted. It's from Dominos.


I wish for a good cheese pizza, with no added social conservatism.

[Trapezohedron]

Granted. Here's a good, unspoiled cheese pizza.

However, I don't eat cheese, and I can't recall where I bought it... Probably from the grocery.

I wish for a Li-ion battery.

[Sirus]

You are battered by a lion.

I wish I were a musical prodigy.

[kaijyuu]

Granted. You were a musical prodigy, but gave up on it early in life and forgot how to make ze musicks.


I wish for candy.

Granted. It's from Dominos.

Joke's on you, I like Dominos pizzas. I loathed working there, as I saw multiple people get crushed into a fine paste in body and spirit by how horribly they treat employees, but the pizza tastes good.

[Trapezohedron]

Granted. Pedobear approaches you with candy, enticing you, but a large Microcline battering ram slams into you and the poor guy, reducing him into piles of gore and viscera. As for you, you're no better. You got impaled on a branch, intestines wrapped around it and painting it red.

I wish I'll be a majestic musician-lawyer.