Use my timey-wimey skills to sneeze my way out of the asylum. Eat anyone who tries to stop me.
(3) Your stomach quickly gets sore and you start sucking on a guard's finger.
Convince the sane that they are mad and the mad that they are sane. Then, stroll out of the asylum leaving the new patients and doctors to fend for themselves.
(3) You convince some random doctors that they are insane, they get tossed in your cell.
Find alien fleet.
Become commander. Prefferably by beating up old commander.
(6) You find the alien fleet hidden in the forest, and although you punched the alien commander in what appears to be his unmentionables, the aliens aren't too keen on taking orders from a 7 year old.
Breakdance!
(3) You wobble around and collapse onto the floor.
Ascend into godhood while laughing maniacally!
(2) Zeus hits you in the head for impersonating a god, you are now half embedded in the wall.
Chew his face.
Chew it most vigorously.
(6) You swallow it whole and you can't breathe from the obstruction in your throat.
Create an army of loyal Cyborgs to give everyone hugs
(2) You put a tissue on your face in an effort to become a cloth cyborg, no one really cares.
Convert other patients into cultists who worship me!
(3) You convince some of the more insane patients that you are in fact, the god of hamburgers.
Discover the lost art of technomancy.
(1) Anyone with a cellphone can control you, the GM also hits you for making him Google technomancy.
Enter box and go to the future.
(1) The box is now everywhere in time, a large amount of monsters are trying to get inside.
USE THIS OPPORTUNITY TO QUICKLY PREACH ABOUT THE COMMUNIST GOD!!!!
(4) You preach about the god a Communism, the insane patients stop worshiping the god of hamburgers and worship him instead.
Use my super awesome ninja goat skills to get into the vents
(5) No one is really sure why a goat is here or how it got in the vents but that's what happened, you level up into the goat ninja master.
There's a new forum member and his first post is here! Everyone gets party hats for 1 turn.
(6) The world starts slowly pulsing, with every pulse you see a bayonet charge which quickly disappears.