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Author Topic: Wizard Chat  (Read 12185 times)

Rolepgeek

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #120 on: January 15, 2015, 12:56:49 am »

What about the mundanes who happen to have a breakdown?

I mean really people, teleportation was invented for a reason. We don't have to live right in the midst of society, where our work can be interrupted and our peace and quiet ruined.

I only just managed to finish erasing all public memory and record of Keuper-Rheaux Castle, and it was annoying, but on the bright side: no tourists!

Hunters can be a bother though. Best to keep a low profile, so I prefer to send them on their way with a wipe, a deer carcass, and a few empty beer cans to explain the amnesia.
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Shadestyle

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #121 on: January 15, 2015, 01:03:00 am »

I live a step to the left on reality, that's why I need to get my mail on the leyway. Magically created pocket dimentions are very easy to move, and can have exits and entrances anywhere, Kid of like that Dr. Who movie.
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flabort

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #122 on: January 15, 2015, 01:10:07 am »

My alarms aren't set to trigger on mortals without knowledge of the arcane sort.

The spell could detect a mortal with a dabbling knowledge of spellcasting, but it also provides me with a threat assessment.

I mean, he had anti-undead bullets! That's a high threat if I ever felt one!

And as far as mortals bothering me in the midst of society, it's a freeway in the middle of no-where. My lair is the only landmark visible from there anyways. Sure, it attracts mortals to wander up to the lair out of curiosity, and sometimes Lich Hunters, but my alarms detect the latter and the former get taken out by the traps closer to my lair and deposited into a big pile for me to pick and choose which to Resurrect at my leisure. Or Zombify, Skeletify, or Frankenstein. It's not my only lair, but it's my turf. I staked it out, the mortals built the freeway, and I added to my alarm spells so that wizards just passing through and NOT stopping would be able to do just that.
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Shadestyle

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #123 on: January 15, 2015, 01:19:58 am »

What is your policy on being baited, Like if someone dumped a disposable wizard out there to poke your defenses for fault or something like that.
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Harbingerjm

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #124 on: January 15, 2015, 02:44:25 am »

Who would ever do something like that?
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LordSlowpoke

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #125 on: January 15, 2015, 06:13:22 am »

alright you scrubs

focal orb cut: ring, twin turtle, ahnenerbe or altra
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sjm9876

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #126 on: January 15, 2015, 06:25:32 am »

Raw.

A focal orb found on the fey planes will, in its natural state, have a shape optimised to channeling magic. Cutting it will actually impede that ability.

Of course, artificial orbs are best cut, the actual type of cutting depending on the type of magic. But artificial orbs are almost always inferior.
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Cryxis, Prince of Doom

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #127 on: January 15, 2015, 08:08:39 am »

The communicator works, guys. I spared no expense getting a good one; made sure it was from a reliable dealer.

Heph isn't a threat. I'm relieved. He possesses more autonomous will than most of my minions, but he IS completely under my control, he can't harm me or work against me. He's some sort of forge spirit anyways, crafting things is what he did on his native plane. But, being a being of pure fire, his only job was to heat the metal. He's appreciative that I gave him form and am allowing him to work out his creativity. I think I have a new favorite pet.

I'm still not sure what mistake I made that lead to his binding to this plane, and he doesn't know either. He didn't think his kind could be bound to our plane, or even to objects. I'm going to experiment some more with binding spirits to armor tonight, see if it can be repeated. Probably around dawn, but if it was something to do with the moon, or maybe a simultaneous spell nearby in the planar cosmology got it's weave interrupted by mine.

Cryxis, your zombies uprising against you is a problem. I have a properly enchanted Black Onyx of Complete Servitude that I can loan you, just hold onto the golden bit and touch the gemstone part to the zombies in question to completely fix the issue. They'll forget about unions, and being zombies they'll not be affected by the negative side effects. Er... don't use it on mortals, they fall completely in love with you and won't leave you alone for a second. They'll move heaven and earth to be with you and serve you, usually being more of a harm than a help; the bit where they're more harmful than helpful and won't leave you alone are the side effects that affect mortals.

Thanks
I'll handle it with the utmost care
*Cryxis snaps his fingers and butler skeleton appears, with what he asked for earlier
"My friend here has a solution for us, he say you hold this by the golden bit and tap the gem on the afflicted zed and they will return to being under our power. Just don't, the love of all that is holy, don't use it on mortals"
The butler nodds his head and disappears and his cloud of black and red
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IcyTea31

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #128 on: January 15, 2015, 01:04:19 pm »

How convenient, this seems like a suitable thread to write about this. Maybe one of you can help explain a few things.

I inherited a box from my late grandfather. It contained two books, titled The Warper's Handbook and Timewalking: the Future, Past and Present of Transportation, a pair of spectacles, a circlet made out of silver and an ebony cane.

The first book is weird and difficult to read. Some pages have three sides, some only one. A few times, even though I kept browsing forward, I kept seeing the same pages. One page seemed empty, but actually projected itself on my wall. What I can read, however, is very interesting. It describes many "spells" to translocate and otherwise warp things around. I haven't tried any of them yet, but something tells me they're going to work. When I put the book down and looked away for a moment, it disappeared, and I found it a while later in my bookshelf. Handy, though annoying.

The second book was much easier. The text was easy, interesting and fun, and it seemed like time flew as I read. This one describes "spells" to control time in various forms (mostly ones for "the road"), though many of them require obscure...ingredients? What is a clockroach anyway and where do I get its mandibles? I might try one in a while, though the risks explained in a chapter are rather dire. Apparently, becoming my own grandpa would be a best-case scenario for a "miscast".

The spectacles show strange angles on everything I look through them, probably an extra spatial dimension or something. Wouldn't be weird with what the books tell me. The circlet, I have no idea. It looks nice, though The cane, apparently, is a sort of focus for magic and required for many of the "spells."

...Now that I think about it, maybe they weren't kidding when they said grandpa went to a better place... We never had a funeral, after all.

The question is, should I try any of this stuff? It doesn't make much sense and seems dangerous, but lucrative.
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Shadestyle

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #129 on: January 15, 2015, 01:35:33 pm »

Remember, There is a fine line between "Closed Time loop" and "Unfixable time paradox." "Plan for 10 years of time travel before you do one day of it" is what my great grandson used to say.
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Fniff

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #130 on: January 15, 2015, 02:10:29 pm »

My cousin and I (Apparently) tried killing Saklolev, the infamous dictator who killed billions.
Never heard of him? That's because it worked. I think. Memory gets screwy with time travel. Only she remembers all the little details.
I say go for it, just try backing your memories up before hand.

Cryxis, Prince of Doom

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #131 on: January 15, 2015, 02:36:59 pm »

Anybody ever dealt with some insane wizard one his last leg (almost dead) trying to sell you his soul put into his staff?
Some old, falling apart crazy and crotchety wizard trying to sell me a staff that supposedly contains his soul that is also supposedly super powerful.
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IcyTea31

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #132 on: January 15, 2015, 02:46:33 pm »

I say go for it, just try backing your memories up before hand.
Er, how am I supposed to do that? The book has nothing on it and I don't exactly have anyone around to show me the ropes.
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Harbingerjm

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #133 on: January 15, 2015, 04:53:39 pm »

Anybody ever dealt with some insane wizard one his last leg (almost dead) trying to sell you his soul put into his staff?
I would not call them insane, but yes, there have been many wizards that have sold all kinds of things to us. Why do you ask?
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15:35   HugoLuman reads Harb his secret spaghetti recipe

Cryxis, Prince of Doom

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Re: Wizard Chat
« Reply #134 on: January 15, 2015, 05:05:14 pm »

Should I accept it?
It's at a very cheap price and the guy is very sketchy, even by wizardy standards.
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