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[TheBiggerFish]

...
Note to self:Make plans for moving to Canada.

[Baffler]

Thank you for reminding me of option 4: Actively bring about the oncoming apocalypse.

It's really tempting, I must admit. Maybe I'll register Republican so I can show my support...

[RedKing]

*sigh* Fine, I'll start saving up the blood of virgins and the hands of glory.

[Baffler]

It's gonna be the yugest, classiest apocalypse anyone's seen since Atlantis sank into the ocean.

[RedKing]

And with Republican stances on climate change and fracking, it might be remarkably similar.

"And so came the Doom to America, that the land did shake and burst asunder, and the waves rose and covered the great places of the land, so that all was swallowed up, save for the great mountains of the Rocky Islands, which were spared because of their dank kush."

[wierd]

While we have many thieves and other criminals on hand in the US (Largest incarceration rate in the world!), we dont typically hang them anymore. (Though with the refusal of drug makers to sell phenobarbital for execution use, I understand firing squads and hanging are becoming "things" again in some states.) I am curious where you are getting the raw materials for your Hands of Glory.

Or is that part of the fun, Hanging people and chopping off their hands?

And yes-- the "Roof is on fire" outcome is inevitable with a Trump VS Clinton ticket, which is why I loathe it so. (Others will disagree on my opinion of Clinton, and I will concede that she is 'less' terrible than Trump, but that's like comparing constipated shit to diarrhea shit. One is slightly less disgusting than the other. Both the fast lane and the scenic route to oblivion both lead to the same place.)

[Shadowlord]

... I'm still voting for Dangers. Dangers. Dangers. Sanders. That's better. #postedfrommyphone

[RedKing]

Phone confirmed for Hillary shill.

[mainiac]

Got tired of denying good policy and good polling so now you are denying good spelling?

[PTTG??]

Let's not forget that Hillary is trying to steal Ban Ki Moon's DNA and spying on allies. Maybe the breach of trust will kill the TPP, but still I would rather have a civil rights and corporate responsibility president than the Bond Villain president.

[wierd]

"No Mr Sanders, I expect you to lose."

Austin Powers:
"She stole my Mojo!"

[smjjames]

Why do some of 538's staff think Kasich is possibly running for VP in todays snapchat? Kasich has said several times that he isn't running for second fiddle and would not want to be VP.

[Karlito]

The idea is that since Kasich isn't running a national campaign, he's not clearly in the race to win the nomination, so why is he still running?

[wierd]

The political version of Dunning Kruger.

[lemon10]

While we have many thieves and other criminals on hand in the US (Largest incarceration rate in the world!), we dont typically hang them anymore. (Though with the refusal of drug makers to sell phenobarbital for execution use, I understand firing squads and hanging are becoming "things" again in some states.) I am curious where you are getting the raw materials for your Hands of Glory.

There are a suprisingly large amount of countries that still have hanging as a method of execution, including the United States (although only in the states of Washington and New Hampshire).

Only two states having hangings means that there would be nearly impossible to get a decent stockpile if you are just using american hands over any reasonable time frame, but you should be able to get some outside of the US without a huge amount of trouble. Iran uses hanging for the typical execution, and with ~300 people being executed per year getting some would be quite easy with a few well placed bribes.