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[UDIL SODKIB]

I am making this thread because of a joke I had heard about DF. The joke being, If you give a dwarf a fire he'll be warm for a day, If you light a dwarf on fire he'll be warm for the rest of his life. I was in a ranty mood and I happened to utter this joke, upon doing so I got to wondering, couldn't you apply this joke to elves. When I applied that joke to elves I found it would be a kind way to go for elves. so really this is about what is the meanest way to murder elves. What ever the case may be please tell me what you think.

[Dorsidwarf]

The meanest way to kill off the elves?


Geld the entire species.

[Max™]

Pile other dead elves on hatches and floor grates, trap other elves in a tunnel below them, drop the body parts onto them from high enough that they suffer serious injuries which will kill if left untreated, but not immediately fatal ones.

Place spires in a magma cistern, each 1x1 and at least 3 squares from another spire, have them extend three or four z  above the magma itself, and pit elves onto the spires. Assuming elves will starve to death if left uncaged, pit food onto adjacent spires, force them to try to make the jump to eat. If they don't need to eat, set up a path to freedom which requires hopping from spire to spire, make other elves watch before they get a chance to play.

[UDIL SODKIB]

I think the meanest way to kill elves is to freeze them then melt the corpses with magma mist.
I say this because they live in temperate forests so when you kill them like this you are killing them with temperatures that are extreme for them.
 
if I'm not making any sense its because I'm not.

[pisskop]

It is immoral to do so, yes.  But as overseers we take responsibility for the actions of the fort, and since the hammerer can never find us we cant be punished.

[UDIL SODKIB]

I don't quite find it immoral to kill elves with lava (or at all), I just find it a kind way to murder elven scum. what Im looking for is to find the most traumatizing way to murder elves. also as a added bonus try to figure out how to kill them and keep the loot from them. I believe the word that is synonymous with the word Im looking for is goblinite

[Aslandus]

Trap the elves in a room made entirely out of wood, and drop elf corpses and wooden cups down into the room until they die of starvation...

[UDIL SODKIB]

Trap the elves in a room made entirely out of wood, and drop elf corpses and wooden cups down into the room until they die of starvation...

now that is awesome. i will dedicate a fortress to this idea.

[pisskop]

Trap the elves in a room made entirely out of wood, and drop elf corpses and wooden cups down into the room until they die of starvation...

now that is awesome. i will dedicate a fortress to this idea.

Elves dont strave in fortress mode?

[UDIL SODKIB]

I wonder do elves starve or do you need to danger room the elves.
actually can you danger room elven caravans I wonder

I'm off to do science

[Aslandus]

Then use a danger room full of wooden spears (maybe one or two glass spikes to make sure it's lethal)

[Col_Jessep]

Lock them in a room with a full wood stockpile and set the stockpile on fire?

[utunnels]

Maybe.
But hacking their limbs off and leaving them to bleed out doesn't sound more right than vaporizing them with magma.

Unless, you are planning to capture them or wait for them to leave.

[Edward Evjen]

The meanest way to deal with elves is to let them live.
They have horrible existences, they don't appreciate the master craftdwarfship of wooden objects.
In times past their ignorance has led to fortresses dying from lack of barrels by their restrictive wood cutting ordinances.
They do not do their job as garbage disposal well. When they come to pick up your garbage, they don't bring wagons.
All of this is probably due to the fact that they have their heads in the clouds.

Therefore, it is morally right too kill off elves. I mostly throw them off bridges unto spike traps.

Though very post here has great advice. I'd get creative. The wooden room one is fantastic. I would like to see have elves fair in caverns though.

[The Bard]

I engage is a dastardly war of attrition wherein I trade them useless rock crafts for all their dangerous and delicious animals and/or fruit.

Eventually, I will have all the war animals and protein and they will die, choking on rocks shaped like cheese! Muah-Muah-Muahahahahaha!