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Founders should have a fixed number of useable tiles to own!

5 (29.4%)

Founders should be awarded more tiles to build on by popular consensus!

6 (35.3%)

No hard limits, just be reasonable!

6 (35.3%)

Total Members Voted: 10

[Broseph Stalin]

http://imgur.com/a/fCHeG

Okay let's take another crack at it.

[evictedSaint]

Bim Eshtanilun, the Smith.  3 to Blacksmithing, 3 to Weaponsmithing, 2 to Metalcrafting,  2 to Armorsmithing.  Please enable Furnace Operation after embark, too.

[pisskop]

Stakud Ancientboulder the doctor. 

1 Diagnose
1 appraiser
 doctor skills

[Broseph Stalin]

Stakud Ancientboulder the doctor.  By that I also mean bone carver.

Specific skills?

[WillowLuman]

Dibs on Stakud Ancientboulder, 2 to woodcutting, 4 to carpentry, 4 to axeman. DAMNIT

I can just see that line spoken sadly as he looks over some huge disaster. "It's so great when everybody just gets along..."

Ast Scaledpage, then. Same skills.

[Broseph Stalin]

I know pencil_art hasn't picked his dwarf yet but he hasn't been on all day and I'm very concerned I'll get a sudden crash while lingering precariously on the unsaveable embark screen so I'm going to assign skills to the last three dwarves and he can pick one when he shows up.

[evictedSaint]

I know pencil_art hasn't picked his dwarf yet but he hasn't been on all day and I'm very concerned I'll get a sudden crash while lingering precariously on the unsaveable embark screen so I'm going to assign skills to the last three dwarves and he can pick one when he shows up.

Sounds like a plan, just pick skills that are useful for a starting embark.  And please hurry, I'm getting dangerously attached to this new dwarf and if your computer crashes I don't know if my little heart can take it. ;_;

[Broseph Stalin]

Sounds like a plan, just pick skills that are useful for a starting embark.  And please hurry, I'm getting dangerously attached to this new dwarf and if your computer crashes I don't know if my little heart can take it. ;_;

Embarked and saved. You have no idea the twinge of panic I felt every time I had to hit escape on the embark screen and was convinced it would kick me back to the start screen.

[wierd]

Screw it, i'll play. 

I'll take Dastot. I like his conflicted personal morale.  Independence is foolish, but cooperation has little value. Also finds friendship and merrymaking to be of value. Sounds like a lazy ass to me.

I'd like to go last if possible.

[Broseph Stalin]

Overseer Succession
Turn CompletedTurn SkippedTurn In ProgressAwaiting Turn

1. Broseph Stalin

2. Pisskop

3. Pencil_Art
4. evictedSaint

5. HugoLuman

6. FREE
7. Wierd

The Succession as it currently exists.

[wierd]

I know pencil_art hasn't picked his dwarf yet but he hasn't been on all day and I'm very concerned I'll get a sudden crash while lingering precariously on the unsaveable embark screen so I'm going to assign skills to the last three dwarves and he can pick one when he shows up.

Sounds like a plan, just pick skills that are useful for a starting embark.  And please hurry, I'm getting dangerously attached to this new dwarf and if your computer crashes I don't know if my little heart can take it. ;_;

Since you are getting attached already, I have started doing some MSPaint crazy for you. Sadly, I dont know what Bim is wearing, but I will improvise. So far she looks a bit like a white haired whoopie goldberg with a comb-over.  Umber eyes and copper skin with a sunken look seems to be doing that somehow.



Ok. Sorry for the long wait-- I see Broseph is already underway with the fun.

Here you go EvictedSaint, One MSPaint rendition of Bim SmithHalls in a red pigtail dress.


Doing all that in MSPaint is tireing without a proper mouse, so I got lazy toward the end. Feel free to do whatever with it.

[Broseph Stalin]

The following is a transcript of a parchment found neatly rolled and sealed with dark brown wax and a copper coin pressed into the seal.

To whatever bureaucrat, administrator, notary or other such stooge may find this letter:

You are an idiot and I hate you. Please enjoy the affixed as my generous and voluntary contribution to His Majesty's Tax Service. May you and everyone you love fall into a burning coal seam and may the molten contents of your coin purse fuse with your seared flesh.


-Sincerely yours Koreg Hawkblockades



I am assuming that you are not by chance the specific ingrate who spent several months wasting my time and drew up the terms of taxation for my proposed expedition and as such may benefit from a more complete explanation

I am Koreg, the first Hawkblockades and it is my destiny to build the greatest dwarven settlement of our age. My dream of our people realizing their glory has been sabotgaed by your incompetence and insistence on following every fragment of bureaucratic minutia. I paid your idiot fees and underwent your idiot inspections and waited for your idiot institutions to pass around writs, contracts, commissions, and all other manner of idiot documents until you returned to me with the disgusting rate at which my new fortress would be taxed.

I decline to be robbed of my dream or my fortune and I shall now explain to you precisely why your and an idiot and I am not. I'm sure you know that everything east of the Balanced Lake and north of the mighty river Distantpearl is ,as a matter of our tenuous peace, the domain of the elves of Mithithiu ,that is the forest retreat of Ringsnarled if you are too stupid to have learned the language of our enemy.  You may also know that that the frozen wastes of the Cyclopean Tundra are treated by the elves of Mithuthithu as an impassable barrier. What I suspect you do not know is that further north, beyond the Cyclopean Tundra, a freak weather phenomanae (the details of which I will not deign to explain to you) results in a small temperate region that is thoroughly untouched by dirty elven hands.

This land is completely outside dwarven influence meaning it cannot be subject to dwarven law. 'But wait', I'm sure the words are forming inside your cramped skull and your thick tongue is already coating them drool and stupidity in preparation to dash my valorious ambitions once again, 'Dwarven fortresses are codified in our laws as being dwarven land! Should you build a fortress in this region you would still be forced to pay into the fund which allows me to purchase the goats I use for companionship and further still it would violate our agreement with the elves who I am too fearful to wage righteous war against.'


Don't worry your tiny head, you see Dwarven law has a specific definition of “Fortress” and I have determined that I have no interest in building one. Instead, I plan to found a village.

   This brings me to my next point of order:

 I hereby renounce my citizenship to the Tame Gears.

Clearly there is no possible way you to steal the wealth of a village (not fortress) created by a non citizen in land you have no claim to. This will technically be an encroachment onto elvish land but it is so thoroughly unutilized by them that I can't imagine they'll raise a fuss and may not even be aware it's technically theirs. Your draconian extractive institutions of taxation and coercion have exhausted my patience with you and in time you will learn to recognize your mistakes when other enterprising and dynamic personalities leave your ridiculous laws and traditions behind. As of this moment over one hundred and fifty of my dwarven kinsmen join me in this endeavor. But fear not, as Overseer and Supreme Leader of this new society I extend you my warmest wishes and open my arms to welcome any of your civilization who wish to live among true dwarves and free from financial tyranny. Further, should the king come to the new seat of my power himself and request residence I shall consider affirming my citizenship once again to grace your pathetic civilization with my brilliance.

Good Day.

Granite 15, The First Journal Entry of Koreg Hawkblockades

I have eaten crow. This is not to say my brilliant plan has somehow failed but that seeing it realized has meant that I have consumed the flesh of a carrion bird. Let it be understood I have chosen not to eat metaphorical crow by remaining warm in my bed or paying the absurd tax rate our kingdom imposes upon entrepreneurs and as a result I have been forced to eat literal crow in order to remain in anything resembling acceptable physical condition during our nasty little groups trek through the Cyclopean Tundra. Crow and ratweed were all I could afford after accommodating other expenses, chiefly paying the Unbridled Thunders of Mithuthithu to both leave us the hell alone up here and to give us fair warning should a dwarven war party come passing through.

   I have a few seeds to bring in a crop of grapes, they should make excellent wine but would also be a passable dessert, potatoes hearty eating but I understand they can be brewed for wine. There will also be rye which produces good flour and a good earthy beer that goes nicely with fish or chicken. To give us some semblance of an agricultural economic base I've brought along rope reed, which can be brewed into intoxicating elvish “River Spirits” but is predominantly a source of very soft fibers which can be spun into fairly luxurious cloth and dyed with the red pigment of the hide root.

   I have also purchased a breeding pair of dogs, cats, chickens, pigs, sheep, and a pair of horses to draw the wagon bringing the whole lot to my chosen site. Until we're established we will be enjoying Dwarven Ale, Rum, Wine, and Beer. With the addition of the necessary picks axes stone blocks and anvil that is ,I believe, a faithful assessment of our supplies. Well technically there's also the silver figurine I liberated from the pawn shop where I was previously forced to sell it. It's an heirloom and it simply wouldn't do to leave it behind. There's also [a few drops of ink collect here where the writers quill apparently rested indecisively for a few moments] a single barrel of ceremonial significance.

   I can't say I'm particularly fond of this place. It's very eerie. The timber is truly ancient here. The trees are nine stories tall in some places and as pleasant as the babbling brook seems now I suspect that it will soon drive me mad without properly insulated walls. I am quite pleased that the giant dingoes and wolverine men of rumor are largely imagined. I have seen a skunk and an owl thusfar., and though I'm certain these blasted woods teem with life it seems reluctant to molest our operations as of yet.

   I have a rough plan of how to proceed but I suspect it will be difficult. I take moral objection to the idea of traditional bureaucracy and even if I did not remaining a “Village” and not a “Fortress” for tax purposes means that certain avenues of administration are closed to me. Keeping things in order will require one person whose basic competence has been established in order to preside over the operations of the different aspects of the fortr [this is furiously scratched out] village. I sincerely wish that my boast about our numbers was true. Sadly there are only seven of us and that means ,I predict, slow going.

   There is Wierd who is detestable and lazy ass whose dour nature on this spectacular day has earned my eternal emnity. He has a passing understanding of pottery and herbalism which suggests to me that he has never pursued a true calling. While I desperately need all the help I can get I would not mind terribly if he had frozen to death.

   There is evictedSaint who is a decent enough smith. I find her lack of competitive drive troublesome but I have not yet formed a greater opinion. Her competence with metalwork will be of the utmost importance to our survival and I will endeavor to furnish her with the resources necessary to practice her trade before she begins losing her edge.

   There is also PK whose talents with the medical and administrative arts are both negligible . I also find it very disturbing that his talent with bonecarving so exceeds his talent with any actual medicine. It's nice to see that at least one member of this motley crew can appreciate good decorum.

   HugoLuman is a reasonable enough sort. I am not happy with her views on emotional honesty but she's capable of woodcutting, figthing with an axe, and carpentry. Her skills will be indispensible particularly in the early stages of our development.

   There are two others, a farmer and a miner but neither have graduated to my notice yet. “Strike the Earth” I suppose is how these things normally go.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Pencil_Art]

Hello?

[Pencil_Art]

I seem to be being missed. I will just pick whatever dwarf there is left, I suppose.

[Broseph Stalin]

Take your pick

Spoiler:  Id Earthencrevice Miner/Potter (click to show/hide)

Spoiler:  Vutok Workclosed Brewer/Thresher (click to show/hide)

(Thank god, I've never tried this challenge with the "Dwarfed Player" requirement for notability and it turns out starting with just five industries is pretty awful)