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[Stirk]

Eat the book, and absorb its knowledge.

+1. It worked before!

Eat the book, and absorb its knowledge.

NO! Just open it or even touch it.
Don't listen to the silly voices.

But...then how will the plot advance? Look, it is in a dungeon guarded by a SINGLE zombie. How much of a threat could it be?

[Ultimuh]

Eat the book, and absorb its knowledge.

+1. It worked before!

Eat the book, and absorb its knowledge.

NO! Just open it or even touch it.
Don't listen to the silly voices.

But...then how will the plot advance? Look, it is in a dungeon guarded by a SINGLE zombie. How much of a threat could it be?

* Ultimuh repeatedly beats the silly people here with a red brick.

[Stirk]

Eat the book, and absorb its knowledge.

+1. It worked before!

Eat the book, and absorb its knowledge.

NO! Just open it or even touch it.
Don't listen to the silly voices.

But...then how will the plot advance? Look, it is in a dungeon guarded by a SINGLE zombie. How much of a threat could it be?

* Ultimuh repeatedly beats the silly people here with a red brick.

Can you give me one reason NOT to eat it? I mean, it has a smiley face on it. And is literally asking us to eat it. Well, touch it, but eating was implied.

[ZalkozDestbro]

Eat the book, and absorb its knowledge.

+1. It worked before!

Eat the book, and absorb its knowledge.

NO! Just open it or even touch it.
Don't listen to the silly voices.

But...then how will the plot advance? Look, it is in a dungeon guarded by a SINGLE zombie. How much of a threat could it be?

* Ultimuh repeatedly beats the silly people here with a red brick.

Can you give me one reason NOT to eat it? I mean, it has a smiley face on it. And is literally asking us to eat it. Well, touch it, but eating was implied.

Eating it is basically just touching it......with our mouth....

[Ultimuh]

We need more sane people posting suggestions. :v

[~Neri]

Technically it's not physically possible to touch anything. You'll always be a nanometer away. Actual physical contact would result in a nuclear explosion from the atoms fusing.

[Stirk]

We need more sane people posting suggestions. :v

I don't see you making any  . Besides, it is purple! Like barney! And barney isn't evil, so this book can't be.

Technically it's not physically possible to touch anything. You'll always be a nanometer away. Actual physical contact would result in a nuclear explosion from the atoms fusing.

That is only true if you define "Touching" as "Atoms colliding together.", and as a chemistry student I can say you are very wrong about the nuclear explosion things. If you mean what I think you mean. Everyone knows nukes are caused by orange juice and gasoline.

[Ultimuh]

We need more sane people posting suggestions. :v

I don't see you making any  . Besides, it is purple! Like barney! And barney isn't evil, so this book can't be.

Just open it or even touch it.

[Stirk]

We need more sane people posting suggestions. :v

I don't see you making any  . Besides, it is purple! Like barney! And barney isn't evil, so this book can't be.

Just open it or even touch it.

What? Your sane plan is to touch the obviously evil book? That is disappointing.

[Ultimuh]

We need more sane people posting suggestions. :v

I don't see you making any  . Besides, it is purple! Like barney! And barney isn't evil, so this book can't be.

Just open it or even touch it.

What? Your sane plan is to touch the obviously evil book? That is disappointing.

Ok.. let me put it in a different way..
Reading the book.. Is like eating it.. With your eyes.
Have you ever eating something with your eyes? Maybe you should try it.

Read the book's contents.

[Tawa]

You just touch the book and it disintegrates...

INTO YOUR MIND.

YOU REALIZE YOUR MISSION: YOU MUST FIND THE LEGENDARY SWORD KNOWN ONLY AS JOHN, TAKE IT FROM ITS RESTING PLACE, AND USE IT TO KILL JAKUNA BY UNDERMINING HIS MAGICAL KNOWLEDGE OF THE FUTURE

BUT FIRST

YOU MUST

BECOME

THE KING OF HAM, WHOSE HAMMINESS SHALL HAM OVER ALL HAM FOR ALL HAM AND PUT TO SHAME ALL HAM BEFORE IT

YES

YOU'RE ALSO NOT IN THAT STUPID DUNGEON ANYMORE BECAUSE IT BLEW UP

[Parsely]

Pierce the heavens?

[ZalkozDestbro]

Pierce the heavens?

Believe in the Shopro that believes in us?

[mastahcheese]

Use Cutscene Powers to instantly arrive at the next plot location.

I swear, you people don't understand how this game works.

[Tawa]

Use Cutscene Powers to instantly arrive at the next plot location.

I swear, you people don't understand how this game works.

You see this guy? This guy gets it. He gets it dangerously well.



THERE IT IS

JOHN