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[Tawa]

"Really? Vell, een zat caze, I believe zat our bounzer, Xinon, vill show you zee door... TO THE AFTERLIFE! XINON! FRESH MEAT!"

Suddenly, this big, beefy guy with the coolest, yet most impractical sword you've ever seen (and inexplicably blue hair) comes charging out of the back room. He wordlessly approaches you, menacingly, kicking over the hat guy's table on the way.

You're Fighting Xinon

This man, known as the Positive Warrior to some, wields the legendary two-handed sword Randolph (which is made of gold. Why gold? Nobody knows) in one hand. The only "positive" thing he's ever really done, though, is helped a little old lady take her groceries inside, and even then, those groceries were mainly composed of sugar derivatives (a class ☃ banned substance.) The rest of the time, he beats random people to death for money and entertainment.

You get the jump on him. Somehow.

Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Inventory
Iron Katana: The only sword the shogun's agents didn't take when Waizu died.
Basic Clothes: The exotic "fashion" of Vareholmians. Provides little protection.
Maneuvers
Rising Sun [1 KP]: Attack with an unusually powerful upward cut.

[Stirk]

Off him money and "Entertainment" to join me. He is obviously to important to die here, he has a name and everything!

[Audioworm333]

Fuck that. Use Rising Sun!

[Tawa]

Off him money and "Entertainment" to join me. He is obviously to important to die here, he has a name and everything!

You don't have any money!

Fuck that. Use Rising Sun!

The power of your ancestors brings a bright blue glow to your body as your blade burns like the Rising Sun. You bring your weapon up, slashing through Xinon's face.



Xinon jumps back and lands on one knee. He leans on his sword and glares at you.



Suddenly, his own blade begins glowing! He charges you, his weapon glowing radiantly.



IT BURNS! -8 HP!

Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Inventory
Iron Katana: The only sword the shogun's agents didn't take when Waizu died.
Basic Clothes: The exotic "fashion" of Vareholmians. Provides little protection.
Maneuvers
Rising Sun [1 KP]: Attack with an unusually powerful upward cut.

You abruptly hear the voice of your mother. Or your sword? You're not sure. Your sword-mother, I bet.
Master, your hit points are low. I recommend replenishing your life at the earliest opportunity.

[Stirk]

You don't have any money!

I didn't say to give him any! Just lie about it. he looks stupid, did you see that expression on his face?

[Ultimuh]

Even though you once were a noble samurai, use underhanded tactics to win this!
Fingers to the eyes! Crotch kick! One thousand years of death!

[Prophet]

EVen though you once were a noble samurai, use underhanded tactics to win this!
Fingers to the eyes! Crotch kick! One thousand years of death!

+1

[Tawa]

he looks stupid, did you see that expression on his face?

EVen though you once were a noble samurai, use underhanded tactics to win this!
Fingers to the eyes! Crotch kick! One thousand years of death!

Nyuk nyuk nyuk! Your life on the line, you drop all notions of fairness. You must avenge Waizu, and none shall stand in your way.



You give a devastating blow to Xinon's head.


"You'll pay for this, rōnin..."

V I C T O R Y

Spoils:
⚔50
+5 HP
+1 KP
Randolph the Blessed Zweihander

You take this opportunity to examine the weapon held by your defeated adversary, and it is cool. It even seems to not be made of gold, but actually just weirdly-colored steel! Sweet! It even looks like you could fit it in your inventory!

As you lightly touch it, you feel radiant power course through your veins. You learned the Radiant Stab!

Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Inventory
Iron Katana: The only sword the shogun's agents didn't take when Waizu died.
Basic Clothes: The exotic "fashion" of Vareholmians. Provides little protection.
Maneuvers
Rising Sun [1 KP]: Attack with an unusually powerful upward cut. Creates fire.
Radiant Stab [2 KP]: Attack with a divine blast of energy. Creates light. Can be used at range (minor penalty).

[Tawa]

Bump.

[Parsely]

Take that hat guy's hat, and the other guy's bandana thing.

[Tawa]

[~Neri]

Loot the corpses/unconscious people.

Search the building.

[Parsely]

Put the zwei in our inventory along with the hat, tie the green bandana to our left bicep. Grab the artist formerly known as Hatguy by the collar and shake him. What's in the buckets? Talk! Is it babby koalas? Are you trafficking stolen marsupials you scum?! Slap him.

[~Neri]

Also lick the hat guy seductively before punching him in the face.

[Haspen]

PTW.

Also lick the hat guy seductively before punching him in the face.

No.