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Author Topic: Vampiric Tourist  (Read 1031 times)

Nail

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Vampiric Tourist
« on: September 26, 2014, 05:00:11 pm »

Here I was, happy as can be about finally solving a minecart problem, when one of my citizens(thankfully just a fisherdwarf) was found drained of blood. I immediately started searching for the vampire, but he didn't even show up when I tried revealing him in dwarf therapist. I used DFhack to check for cursed creatures and there he was, a certain En Sinokenom. Now that name didn't ring any bells, but that was to be expected, so I looked through my dwarve's art. While I was searching I noticed that the human diplomat was visiting and a faint memory of him being a vampire law-giver surfaced. I checked, and yes, he was En Sinokenom.
I had never heard of this happening before, but looking at the justice screen there was indeed a witness who accused him of the murder. I promptly convicted him but while he now appears in the list of criminals, he also seems to have diplomatic immunity as there is no sentence pending.

So now I have the option of either killing him and inciting a war with the humans or leaving him be to come snack on my citizens once every year.

EDIT: Coincidentally the fisherdwarf was apparently out on bail having done all but 4 days of his 101 day sentence for failing to construct toy axes for the baron(one of my dwarves inherited the position for a different site). I suspect a collaboration between the nobles.
« Last Edit: September 26, 2014, 05:06:02 pm by Nail »
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StagnantSoul

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #1 on: September 26, 2014, 05:37:27 pm »

Wait a couple more years, then, one day, send a few soldiers to rend him in two. Send your strongest squad, or this human diplomat will pull out a knife and stab each to death. I had a similar situation, and sent a squad of normal troops to kill him, only to find that he killed them with an iron carving knife.
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Quote from: Cptn Kaladin Anrizlokum
I threw night creature blood into a night creature's heart and she pulled it out and bled to death.
Quote from: Eric Blank
Places to jibber madly at each other, got it
Quote from: NJW2000
If any of them are made of fire, throw stuff, run, and think non-flammable thoughts.

Nail

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #2 on: September 26, 2014, 06:01:42 pm »

Oh I have a perfectly capable military and am aware of the danger vampires pose in combat, but the humans are a valuable training partner at the moment and killing the law giver is usually a cause for war.
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StagnantSoul

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #3 on: September 26, 2014, 06:04:33 pm »

They'll get a new one, and after a few humiliations versus the dwarves, they'll send a diplomat.
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Quote from: Cptn Kaladin Anrizlokum
I threw night creature blood into a night creature's heart and she pulled it out and bled to death.
Quote from: Eric Blank
Places to jibber madly at each other, got it
Quote from: NJW2000
If any of them are made of fire, throw stuff, run, and think non-flammable thoughts.

Aristion

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #4 on: September 26, 2014, 06:31:35 pm »

Or lock him in a room never to see the light of day again and go from there.
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I kept imagining this guy go "By Armok, not the dead roaches! Oh gods the hamsters oh the dwarfmanity!"
Devotes several hours a day making vampires an endangered species.

khearn

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #5 on: September 26, 2014, 07:05:46 pm »

If you just lock him in a room, he won't ever die, so I don't think the humans will ever actually get upset. Ok, so you won't have any more human diplomatic visits. It's not like they're anything other than an annoying interruption to tell you the latest gossip about which human settlement was abandoned or invaded, and who is now mayor of what insignificant human settlement. It's not like it's something you actually care about.

Human Trader: Say, you haven't by any chance seen our diplomat? He hasn't been heard from in a while.
Baron: No. I haven't seen him in almost a year. He didn't travel home with you last year? <shrug> You guys need to keep better track of your people.

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Have them killed. Nothing solves a problem quite as effectively as simply having it killed.

Aristion

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #6 on: September 26, 2014, 07:32:52 pm »

Human Trader: Say, you haven't by any chance seen our diplomat? He hasn't been heard from in a while.
Baron: No. I haven't seen him in almost a year. He didn't travel home with you last year? <shrug> You guys need to keep better track of your people.

I feel like that's what they would say for sure also.
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I kept imagining this guy go "By Armok, not the dead roaches! Oh gods the hamsters oh the dwarfmanity!"
Devotes several hours a day making vampires an endangered species.

Saiko Kila

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #7 on: September 27, 2014, 06:20:20 am »

I have prepared an isolation chamber for a vampire diplomat in case he causes troubles, but he doesn't kill my dwarves, so I let him be. He brings news, and thus has some value. But if he killed someone important I would retaliate by confining him to the chamber. And maybe throwing one of the three minotaurs in, just to give him some company.
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Pirate Bob

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #8 on: September 27, 2014, 06:31:21 am »

I had the humans send what I think may have been a necromancer as their diplomat (he was a Ñ, and I don't think vampires are revealed as such) in 34.11.  I decided to help them out by killing him, and the next year they sent a siege, which I slaughtered, but the following year they sent another caravan.  Long story short - just kill him.  He murdered a dwarf, so he deserves to die...

Staalo

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #9 on: September 27, 2014, 07:41:39 am »

I simply sent a squad to greet the human vampire law-giver diplomat who had snacked on a militia captain the year before. There were absolutely no repercussions from killing the vampire; year after that the humans just sent another diplomat.

"A year ago Thep Channelarmors became law-giver of the North Confederacy, replacing Opte Southferns", the new diplomat reported to my mayor. I think he was just pleased about his promotion.
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Kasmko Taldequihu, Human Criminal corrupted zombie is visiting.
Mong Todsporro, Human Criminal death zombie is visiting.

Uhhh... welcome?

Findulidas

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #10 on: September 27, 2014, 09:03:14 am »

Unless you really need the caravans for stuff like food, clothes or wood you really shouldnt be afraid to destroy them I think. The dwarves might bring precious metals and good armors/weapons and the elves might bring rare plants/useful animals but thats about it. I would say that 1/10 brings you the rare stuff anyway.
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...wonderful memories of the creeping sense of dread...

wuphonsreach

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #11 on: September 27, 2014, 09:55:29 am »

Human caravans arrive with wagons and carry lots of metal items in my current fort, so they are worth trading with.  They were also my only source of rope weed seeds in the first round of caravans.

Still - kill or isolate the vampire, it will be likely to result in !FUN!.
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Sirbug

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #12 on: September 27, 2014, 10:19:22 am »

I had the humans send what I think may have been a necromancer as their diplomat (he was a Ñ, and I don't think vampires are revealed as such) in 34.11.  I decided to help them out by killing him, and the next year they sent a siege, which I slaughtered, but the following year they sent another caravan.  Long story short - just kill him.  He murdered a dwarf, so he deserves to die...

I think that's a vampire. They are revealed if they are diplomats, and I'm pretty sure I've got vampire diplomat listed who showed up as big red N.
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Cool, but wouldn't this likely lead to tongues having a '[SPEACH]' tag, and thus via necromancy we would have nearly unkillable reanimated tongues following necromancers spamming 'it is sad but not unexpected'?

thegoatgod_pan

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Re: Vampiric Tourist
« Reply #13 on: September 27, 2014, 11:10:17 am »

I had the humans send what I think may have been a necromancer as their diplomat (he was a Ñ, and I don't think vampires are revealed as such) in 34.11.  I decided to help them out by killing him, and the next year they sent a siege, which I slaughtered, but the following year they sent another caravan.  Long story short - just kill him.  He murdered a dwarf, so he deserves to die...

I think that's a vampire. They are revealed if they are diplomats, and I'm pretty sure I've got vampire diplomat listed who showed up as big red N.

Yeah, I think it is red for vampire and purple for necromancer.
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More ridiculous than reindeer?  Where you think you supercool and is you things the girls where I honestly like I is then why are humans on their as my people or what would you?