I have a bad long term and short term memory, and I am getting worried.
When it comes to short term memory, I am just lost. Examples: I have to go around the apartment (if I am the last person leaving) four times to make sure that the gas is turned off, the windows are closed, there's no water running or a light on, etc. because everytime I check up on everything, I forget about some things and have to check on them again, etc. And when I finally leave the apartment, I have to turn back twice to maek sure I locked the locks. It's really frustrating. But it doesn't end there. Basically in many conversations I forget the things that had been said not thirty seconds after. If playing "silent message" (dunno what it's called in English), the one giving me the silent message has to repeat it thrice for me to remember it somewhat. I really don't remember much unless I make thewilling effort to do so or unless I am entertained/really interested while commiting something to memory, and even then...
Long term memory betrays me. Even when I make the hardest effort I can, I never seem to be able to remember names, dates, and faces. I made it a routine to tell anyone new I meet and know I'll meet again that I have a bad memory and won't remember them/recognize them, and that they shouldn't be offended because it's entirely my fault. Hell, I can't even remember when anyone in my family has a birthday. I barely know the names of those I meet daily, be it school or past acquintences. But that wouldn't really bother me so much. The problem is I can't remember anything. From the past seventeen years of my life, I only remember fragments. Whenever some asks me/tells me "Hey, do you remember when you and me-" or "Remember what happened there and then" etc. – yeah, no. I don't remember. Hell, I can't seem to remember the names of main characters in the books I read after I finished them, no matter how much I loved them. A month later I'll barely remember what they were about. I have problem learning stuff long term, because I just forget them most of the time, though something sticks, but not even a tenth of what other people remember.
I remember events, but not what transpired them, what was done during them. Short term I can remember details, like a week, max two, but they fade into obscurity quickly.
I feel like my life is slipping by, and I am looking at it from behind a screen. Of course there's a great deal of things I do remember. But that's great deals in my terms. For others, it would probably be only a small portion of their memories. I feel like I lost years of my life, and yet I am barely 18.
Should I be worried? Should I seek out help? I feel like no one will listen. My child doctor (still 17), from how much I know her, would just dismiss it as normal. Others are so used to it that they just consider it normal.
Sorry for the small necro, just needed to vent I guess.