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Should other religions be added to this thread?

No
Only Judeism
Only Islam
Yes to both Judeism and Islam

Pages: 1 ... 69 70 [71] 72 73 ... 185

Author Topic: Christian beliefs and discussion  (Read 194417 times)

smjjames

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1050 on: October 08, 2014, 05:55:48 pm »

No, he basically just yelled at it and it withered and died.

....

lol

He probably poured plant poison in the soil at it's roots when nobody was looking.
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Frumple

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1051 on: October 08, 2014, 05:59:06 pm »

Jesus confirmed for swamp drake?
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Ask not!
What your country can hump for you.
Ask!
What you can hump for your country.

Bouchart

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1052 on: October 08, 2014, 07:56:42 pm »

No, he basically just yelled at it and it withered and died.

Depending on one's interpretation, he did it twice.
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Frumple

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1053 on: October 08, 2014, 08:11:30 pm »

... wait, wait. As in, he yelled at it and withered and died, and then he yelled at it again and it withered and died for a second time?

Because that would actually be a somewhat impressive parlor trick. It is hard to kill what is already killed. Well, more kill.
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Ask not!
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Ask!
What you can hump for your country.

freeformschooler

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1054 on: October 08, 2014, 08:12:57 pm »

What kind of God shows off by killing a fig tree?

I mean, it's rather obnoxious and....silly.

God has a thing for plant torture. See also: burning bush.
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Orange Wizard

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1055 on: October 08, 2014, 08:19:46 pm »

I always assumed the author was doing the repetition for emphasis thing, but killing it twice is way more awesome.
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Please don't shitpost, it lowers the quality of discourse
Hard science is like a sword, and soft science is like fear. You can use both to equally powerful results, but even if your opponent disbelieve your stabs, they will still die.

Bouchart

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1056 on: October 08, 2014, 08:23:22 pm »

What kind of God shows off by killing a fig tree?

I mean, it's rather obnoxious and....silly.

God has a thing for plant torture. See also: burning bush.

And that part in the Book of Job where Job is resting under a plant and it dies.
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Cheeetar

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1057 on: October 08, 2014, 08:33:57 pm »

Doesn't Cain get cursed to kill all the plants near him or something? More proof of an evil anti-plant agenda on the part of our divine creator.
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I've played some mafia.

Most of the time when someone is described as politically correct they are simply correct.

Bouchart

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1058 on: October 08, 2014, 08:42:08 pm »

No, Cain was unable to grow anything.
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Gnorm

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1059 on: October 08, 2014, 08:47:00 pm »

So if I run around naked, I can make people my slaves?

...Why does this not get mentioned more often?
This isn't really an Old Testament law, it's just an instance of a pissed-off prophet; they were fairly prevalent in the early days.

What kind of God shows off by killing a fig tree?

I mean, it's rather obnoxious and....silly.

God has a thing for plant torture. See also: burning bush.

And that part in the Book of Job where Job is resting under a plant and it dies.
I believe you're looking for the Book of Jonah.
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And we were this close to yet another victim of Gnorm, the Overseer Killer.

penguinofhonor

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1060 on: October 08, 2014, 08:47:25 pm »

Doesn't Cain get cursed to kill all the plants near him or something? More proof of an evil anti-plant agenda on the part of our divine creator.

I'm pretty sure you're thinking of SCP Cain.
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Bouchart

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1061 on: October 08, 2014, 08:58:30 pm »

So if I run around naked, I can make people my slaves?

...Why does this not get mentioned more often?
This isn't really an Old Testament law, it's just an instance of a pissed-off prophet; they were fairly prevalent in the early days.

What kind of God shows off by killing a fig tree?

I mean, it's rather obnoxious and....silly.

God has a thing for plant torture. See also: burning bush.

And that part in the Book of Job where Job is resting under a plant and it dies.
I believe you're looking for the Book of Jonah.

Yes that's right.  Don't know why I got the two confused.
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Orange Wizard

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1062 on: October 08, 2014, 09:18:19 pm »

Because they look very similar?

...

I think it's pretty clear, guys. God hates plants.

Heck, one of the very first stories in the Bible is about an evil tree that corrupts mankind!
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Please don't shitpost, it lowers the quality of discourse
Hard science is like a sword, and soft science is like fear. You can use both to equally powerful results, but even if your opponent disbelieve your stabs, they will still die.

Cheeetar

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1063 on: October 08, 2014, 09:24:12 pm »

Doesn't Cain get cursed to kill all the plants near him or something? More proof of an evil anti-plant agenda on the part of our divine creator.

I'm pretty sure you're thinking of SCP Cain.

...I might have been.
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I've played some mafia.

Most of the time when someone is described as politically correct they are simply correct.

penguinofhonor

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Re: Christian beliefs and discussion
« Reply #1064 on: October 08, 2014, 09:28:28 pm »

I think it's pretty clear, guys. God hates plants.

Heck, one of the very first stories in the Bible is about an evil tree that corrupts mankind!

I get it now. God put us here because we're the only species capable of destroying all plant life on earth. Global warming is His way of helping us out.
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