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Author Topic: Coolest Artifact?  (Read 3838 times)

Illogical_Blox

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Coolest Artifact?
« on: September 08, 2014, 02:43:50 pm »

So far, I've only had one artifact - an extremely macabre camel bone coffin.

Oddly, the farmer who produced it had no prior experience and was not allowed to do bone carving... du du du DU!
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Me: "Just imagine a load of dwarves sitting round a table, and one of them says, 'I like stranglers for... for their... their...'"
Brother: "SOFT HANDS!"

StagnantSoul

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #1 on: September 08, 2014, 02:51:49 pm »

He was either possessed or in a macabre mood.
My best artifact(s) were a steel long sword, with an image of a steel shield in platinum, and a steel shield, with an image of a steel long sword in platinum. Matching sword and shield!
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dwarf_reform

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #2 on: September 08, 2014, 05:18:22 pm »

I just got this a couple minutes ago, and this seems like a good thread to put it in :D When I saw it was a hood I knew it'd be spiky and uncomfortable to wear, but I didn't expect the ominous image:

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klefenz

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #3 on: September 08, 2014, 11:17:26 pm »

My best artifact:

Shovedfences, the Viper of Flames

This is a steel battle axe. It menaces with spikes of steel.


that was the whole description, simple and awesome

§k

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #4 on: September 09, 2014, 02:17:51 am »

A lignite floodgate
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Illogical_Blox

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #5 on: September 09, 2014, 01:42:22 pm »

I just got this a couple minutes ago, and this seems like a good thread to put it in :D When I saw it was a hood I knew it'd be spiky and uncomfortable to wear, but I didn't expect the ominous image:


All hail the Parasite King, Lord of Blood-Suckers.

He was either possessed or in a macabre mood.
My best artifact(s) were a steel long sword, with an image of a steel shield in platinum, and a steel shield, with an image of a steel long sword in platinum. Matching sword and shield!
Must have been possessed, as she wasn't unhappy.
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Me: "Just imagine a load of dwarves sitting round a table, and one of them says, 'I like stranglers for... for their... their...'"
Brother: "SOFT HANDS!"

pisskop

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #6 on: September 09, 2014, 01:44:09 pm »

The coolest artifact I have ever had would be a sheep(?)bone floodgate that depicted the drowning of a dwarf.
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Illogical_Blox

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #7 on: September 09, 2014, 02:07:09 pm »

So, something to prevent drowning, depicts drowning? Ironic!
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Brother: "SOFT HANDS!"

TheDarkStar

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #8 on: September 09, 2014, 09:11:43 pm »

The coolest artifact I have ever had would be a sheep(?)bone floodgate that depicted the drowning of a dwarf.

Obviously, it has a safety warning on it: "Don't drown yourself".
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PDF urist master

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #9 on: September 10, 2014, 09:02:14 am »

I've got an addy short sword and a platinum warhammer before.
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mnjiman

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #10 on: September 10, 2014, 09:25:34 am »

Adamantine War Hammer. There were about 4 Adamantine Wafers used to make it. It was worth well over a few million Urist bucks. I had my Hammerer wield it.
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I was thinking more along the lines of this legendary champion, all clad in dented and dinged up steel plate, his blood-drenched axe slung over his back, a notch in the handle for every enemy that saw the swing of that blade as the last sight they ever saw, a battered shield strapped over his arm... and a fluffy, pink stuffed hippo hidden discretely in his breastplate.

Sizik

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #11 on: September 10, 2014, 10:24:20 am »

The coolest artifact I have ever had would be a sheep(?)bone floodgate that depicted the drowning of a dwarf.

Obviously, it has a safety warning on it: "Don't drown yourself".

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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tonnot98

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #12 on: September 10, 2014, 11:29:39 am »

I had my Hammerer wield it.
By that you mean your executioner, right? Otherwise that'd be a pretty bad idea.
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Bralbaard

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #13 on: September 10, 2014, 02:12:58 pm »

Adamantine is a horrible material for hammers, hammers as blunt weapons need to be heavy to do dammage and adamantine is light as a feather.
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mnjiman

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Re: Coolest Artifact?
« Reply #14 on: September 10, 2014, 03:50:22 pm »

Exactly. The point of having a Adamantine Hammer for your Hammerer is so that your Nobles are satisfied punishments are handed out. The dwarves being punished are not injured or being forced to spend a lot of time in jail being chained up. Win win.
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I was thinking more along the lines of this legendary champion, all clad in dented and dinged up steel plate, his blood-drenched axe slung over his back, a notch in the handle for every enemy that saw the swing of that blade as the last sight they ever saw, a battered shield strapped over his arm... and a fluffy, pink stuffed hippo hidden discretely in his breastplate.
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