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[Paphi]

Listen to the fundamental laws of the universe, with intense focus.

[SaberToothTiger]

Dropkick Obama with the speed and super power Chuck Norris gave me.

[LordSlowpoke]

GO COLLEGIFY

MAJOR IN GRASS CHEWING

MINOR IN PROJECTILE METHANE DISTRIBUTION

[KingofstarrySkies]

Steal a jet and nuke. Drop nuke on the Dyson Cow's stomach.

[Coolrune206]

Fly around healing the cow that ate us. Because I'm a bloody pacifist cow.

[masked_krusader]

Fly around healing the cow that ate us. Because I'm a bloody pacifist cow.

HINDER THIS
(DYSON COW MUST DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE)

[Alev]

Peer at the planet through my backside.

[Nidilap]

Shawshank redemption escape

[Lightningfalcon]

Start anarchist cow group, centered around crashing vehicles into shit

[Worldmaster27]

Change how evolution works

[Nidilap]

Start anarchist cow group, centered around crashing vehicles into shit

Like, literally?

[Elephant Parade]

get all the worlds railguns to fire on dyson cow

(2)UNFORTUNATELY, NOBODY LISTENS TO YOU

THEY DON'T LIKE YOUR TYPING STYLE

Use status as the great cow guru to convince the entire world to mass produce pop rocks and pepsi, and launch them into space AKA The Dyson Cow's stomach

(6)THE DYSON COW ABSORBS THEM AND GROWS STRONGER

RESPAWN BY USING SOME OF THE NEW SUNS POWER THUS COOLING IT DOWN AND SAVING EVERYONE.

(5)SUCCESS

ALSO, YOU'RE A FIRE COW NOW

Freak people out even more!

(5)THE ENTIRE WORLD IS IN A STATE OF TOTAL PANIC

CIVILIZATION IS BREAKING DOWN

ALL BECAUSE ONE COW WAS 2SPOOKY4HUMANITY

Set all the added methane on fire

(1)UNFORTUNATELY, YOUR FLAMETHROWER EXPLODES

(YOU PROBABLY COULD'VE PICKED A BETTER TOOL FOR THE JOB, NOW THAT YOU THINK ABOUT IT)

YOU BURN TO DEATH

Listen to the fundamental laws of the universe, with intense focus.

(1)IT TURNS OUT THAT THEY'RE INCREDIBLY LOUD; THEY'RE JUST AT A WEIRD FREQUENCY

YOU GO DEAF

Dropkick Obama with the speed and super power Chuck Norris gave me.

(2)THE ONLY POWER CHUCK NORRIS GAVE YOU WAS THE TEMPORARY POWER TO SOAR THROUGH THE AIR

IT WORE OFF AFTER YOU HIT THE GROUND

GO COLLEGIFY

MAJOR IN GRASS CHEWING

MINOR IN PROJECTILE METHANE DISTRIBUTION

(2)COW COLLEGE IS CLOSED DUE TO MASS HYSTERIA

Steal a jet and nuke. Drop nuke on the Dyson Cow's stomach.

(5)THE DYSON COW SUFFERS MASSIVE DAMAGE

UNFORTUNATELY, THE RADIATION WILL REACH THE EARTH IN FOUR TURNS

Fly around healing the cow that ate us. Because I'm a bloody pacifist cow.

HINDER THIS
(DYSON COW MUST DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE)

(3-1)YOU ATTEMPT TO TAKE OFF IN A PLANE, BUT YOU ARE DRAGGED DOWN BY AN INCREDIBLY HEAVY COW SHOUTING "DYSON COW MUST DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE".

Peer at the planet through my backside.

(5)THE PLANET SEEMS TO BE IN A STATE OF PANIC

YOU FEEL BAD

Shawshank redemption escape

WHAT?

Start anarchist cow group, centered around crashing vehicles into shit

(4)YOUR GROUP IS UNEXPECTEDLY POPULAR

PROBABLY BECAUSE OF THE MASS HYSTERIA

Change how evolution works

(4)EVOLUTION NOW HAPPENS OVER THE COURSE OF AN INDIVIDUAL'S LIFETIME, AS THE DNA ADAPTS TO THE INDIVIDUAL'S NEEDS

Spoiler: EARTH (click to show/hide)

HEAT-O-METER
|H|----:-----|C|

RADIATION DISTANCE: 4

Spoiler: DYSON COW (click to show/hide)

HEALTH: 40%

[Coolrune206]

Agree with heavy cow, fire all weapons at dyson cow!

[Furtuka]

PLAN WITH GOVERMENTS TO EXPOSE ALL OF EARTH TO SMALL AMOUNTS OF RADIATION IN INCREASING INCREMENTS, THEREBY CAUSING THE NEW EVOLUTION TO MAKE ALL LIFE CAPABLE OF SURVIVING THE RADIATION WAVE

[Lightningfalcon]

HAVE COW ANARCHIST FREE DYSON COW FROM THE GOVERNMENT OPPRESSION