It's a serious question though. Whips seem close but I'm hesitant to include them because of their absurd brokenness. Testing shows that wooden whips are ineffective vs. steel, though, and it'll take a while to get anything better. The new wood types, as I'm making them, should be about a tier below equivalent metal effectiveness for edged weapons. Blunt weapons are going to generally be ineffective since they're going to be pretty light no matter what you do, though when I get to it you should be able to make them out of wood infused with gold and stuff.
EDIT: The reaction method worked. Weapons are getting the same treatment, then the next version is going up on dffd.
EDIT2: God fucking damnit. Apparently you can substitute wheelbarrows for hearts for no good reason. Also, colors are borked on the new custom workshops.
I'll work more on this tomorrow. Here are the relevant raws if you would like to help.
heart
[ITEM_TOOL:HEARTWOOD]
[NAME:heart:hearts]
[TOOL_USE:HOLD_MEAT_FOR_CARVING]
[WOOD_MAT]
[VALUE:50]
[TILE:72]
[SIZE:400000]
custom shops
[BUILDING_WORKSHOP:HEARTWOOD]
[NAME:Heartwood Shrine]
[NAME_COLOR:5:0:1]
[DIM:5:5]
[BUILD_LABOR:CUTWOOD]
[WORK_LOCATION:5:3]
[BLOCK:1:0:0:0:0:0]
[BLOCK:2:0:1:1:1:0]
[BLOCK:3:0:1:1:1:0]
[BLOCK:4:0:1:1:1:0]
[BLOCK:5:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:0:1:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:0:2:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:0:3:0:0:157:0:0]
[TILE:0:4:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:0:5:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:0:1:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:0:2:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:0:3:0:0:0:0:0:0:MAT:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:0:4:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:0:5:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:1:1:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:1:2:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:1:3:0:0:157:0:0]
[TILE:1:4:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:1:5:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:1:1:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:1:2:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:1:3:0:0:0:0:0:0:MAT:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:1:4:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:1:5:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:2:1:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:2:2:0:126:126:126:0]
[TILE:2:3:0:126:5:126:0]
[TILE:2:4:0:126:126:126:0]
[TILE:2:5:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:2:1:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:2:2:0:0:0:6:0:0:6:0:0:6:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:2:3:0:0:0:6:0:0:MAT:6:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:2:4:0:0:0:6:0:0:6:0:0:6:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:2:5:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:3:1:247:247:247:247:247]
[TILE:3:2:247:240:20:240:247]
[TILE:3:3:247:240:199:240:247]
[TILE:3:4:247:240:182:240:247]
[TILE:3:5:247:247:247:247:247]
[COLOR:3:1:6:0:0:6:0:0:6:0:0:6:0:0:6:0:0]
[COLOR:3:2:6:0:0:1:0:0:MAT:1:0:0:6:0:0]
[COLOR:3:3:6:0:0:1:0:0:MAT:1:0:0:6:0:0]
[COLOR:3:4:6:0:0:1:0:0:MAT:1:0:0:6:0:0]
[COLOR:3:5:6:0:0:6:0:0:6:0:0:6:0:0:6:0:0]
[BUILD_ITEM:1:TOOL:NONE:NONE:NONE][CAN_USE_ARTIFACT][HAS_TOOL_USE:HOLD_MEAT_FOR_CARVING]
[BUILD_ITEM:3:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][BUILDMAT][WORTHLESS_STONE_ONLY][CAN_USE_ARTIFACT]
[BUILDING_WORKSHOP:GUARDSHAPER]
[NAME:Guardshaper's Shrine]
[NAME_COLOR:2:0:1]
[DIM:3:3]
[BUILD_LABOR:FORGE_ARMOR]
[WORK_LOCATION:2:2]
[BLOCK:1:1:1:0]
[BLOCK:2:1:0:1]
[BLOCK:3:1:1:0]
[TILE:0:1:92:93:' ']
[TILE:0:2:91:' ':72]
[TILE:0:3:93:91:' ']
[COLOR:0:MAT:MAT:0:0:0]
[COLOR:0:MAT:0:0:0:5:0:0]
[COLOR:0:MAT:MAT:0:0:0]
[TILE:1:1:92:93:' ']
[TILE:1:2:91:' ':72]
[TILE:1:3:93:91:' ']
[COLOR:1:MAT:MAT:0:0:0]
[COLOR:1:MAT:0:0:0:5:0:0]
[COLOR:1:MAT:MAT:0:0:0]
[TILE:2:1:92:93:' ']
[TILE:2:2:91:' ':72]
[TILE:2:3:93:91:' ']
[COLOR:2:MAT:MAT:0:0:0]
[COLOR:2:MAT:0:0:0:5:0:0]
[COLOR:2:MAT:MAT:0:0:0]
[TILE:3:1:199:194:' ']
[TILE:3:2:199:' ':72]
[TILE:3:3:199:193:' ']
[COLOR:3:MAT:MAT:0:0:0]
[COLOR:3:MAT:0:0:0:5:0:1]
[COLOR:3:MAT:MAT:0:0:0]
[BUILD_ITEM:1:TOOL:NONE:NONE:NONE][CAN_USE_ARTIFACT][HAS_TOOL_USE:HOLD_MEAT_FOR_CARVING]
[BUILD_ITEM:1:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][BUILDMAT][WORTHLESS_STONE_ONLY][CAN_USE_ARTIFACT]
[BUILDING_WORKSHOP:WARSHAPER]
[NAME:Warshaper's Shrine]
[NAME_COLOR:3:0:1]
[DIM:3:3]
[BUILD_LABOR:FORGE_WEAPON]
[WORK_LOCATION:3:3]
[BLOCK:1:0:1:0]
[BLOCK:2:1:1:1]
[BLOCK:3:0:1:0]
[TILE:0:1:' ':' ':' ']
[TILE:0:2:' ':72:' ']
[TILE:0:3:' ':' ':' ']
[COLOR:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:0:0:0:0:5:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:1:1:' ':' ':' ']
[TILE:1:2:' ':72:' ']
[TILE:1:3:' ':' ':' ']
[COLOR:1:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:1:0:0:0:5:0:0:0:0:0]
[COLOR:1:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0:0]
[TILE:2:1:' ':194:' ']
[TILE:2:2:196:197:196]
[TILE:2:3:' ':193:' ']
[COLOR:2:0:0:0:MAT:0:0:0]
[COLOR:2:MAT:5:0:0:MAT]
[COLOR:2:0:0:0:MAT:0:0:0]
[TILE:3:1:' ':210:' ']
[TILE:3:2:204:72:182]
[TILE:3:3:' ':208:' ']
[COLOR:3:0:0:0:MAT:0:0:0]
[COLOR:3:MAT:5:0:1:MAT]
[COLOR:3:0:0:0:MAT:0:0:0]
[BUILD_ITEM:1:TOOL:NONE:NONE:NONE][CAN_USE_ARTIFACT][HAS_TOOL_USE:HOLD_MEAT_FOR_CARVING]
[BUILD_ITEM:1:NONE:NONE:NONE:NONE][BUILDMAT][WORTHLESS_STONE_ONLY][CAN_USE_ARTIFACT]
in other news the reactions function properly, though the profession name "metalsmith" is getting a quick edit