From a perspective of somebody not involved, this discussion seems a little bit heated up.
Why does one expectation exclude the other?
I see DF as a RTS within a (one day) fully simulated world.
I see that the changes made in the current version are HUGE but I also feel a little disappointed because there aren't that many changes to fortress mode that seem worth the wait of 2 long years.
But I know that this update is the groundwork for much bigger things still to come and I cant wait for the next "big update", the inclusion of taverns, my own armies and all the cool stuff.
Someday, I hope, DF will be a the most complex world simulation which will ever be made (yes I know that this is greatly exaggerated) and within this complex world there will by my character which starts as a mere peasant to become king of a great kingdom which started as a hut in the woods, grew to a small village and became a flourishing city!
The problem now is, we have fortress mode, adv. mode and legends mode. Not one great game but 3 separate games which are loved by some and ignored by others, if one mode gets some changes and the others don't there will be people who feel a bit "left out".
But as Putnam said, in the great picture, someday we all will play the same game with endless possibilities so that everyone will be happy
And in the meantime, we should work together to get the most out of what we have. For everyone