Grab an officer's gun. Hide in the crawlspace under some guy's house.
((Shouldn't I be level 2 (1/3)? *grub grub grub*))
(2)You panic and run away. The police chase after you.
Rent the friggin' room, then!
(6)You do so. In your haste, you accidentally pay double the cost of the room.
While unconscious, have a prophetic dream.
(6)You have a mysterious dream. Unfortunately, in true prophetic dream fashion, you forget the dream upon waking up.
((What does the ^ by my level mean? Is it a typo? Also, yay for Badass ++.))
Ride motorcycle around to find somewhere to stay for the night. Preferably somewhere fit for a badass.
(4)You arrive at the same hotel Lyeos found.
((What's the aura orb do?))
Punch a wall.
It's a weak weapon that powers up after being used 9,001 times.
(3)You fail to damage the wall. You also hurt your hand slightly.
Complain to the fourth wall that the level up screen says I'm level 2 even though I am level 1 and my [Clothes] not being inventory screen.
How much money do I have?
Look for an hotel
[2]You have $10.
(3)You find a run-down motel. It doesn't look like a nice place to stay.
Look for a shopping mall in the area
(5)You find one!
Make the owner an awesome RtD game in exchange for being unbanned from his cafe.
(6)You succeed, since I cannot think of any way to make this overshoot.
Buy enough hair gel to turn my head into a shiny rock. Then look for friends to stay with for the night.
(1)The hair gel turns out to be acidic. Your hair is burned off.
(4)You go to the hotel, since you don't know anyone.
ACQUIRE EMPTY HOUSE, SQUAT
(6)Rumour of your squatting gets out. The police will probably investigate tomorrow.
((Does my +1 not apply on ones?))
Use my sacrificial knife (which was on my person) to carve a new ritual of return in the soft metal.
(5)Success! Also, both rituals are still intact, so you're free to enter or leave the dimension.
Try punching the goblin in the face this time.
(6v3)You knock the goblin's head off. You have vanquished the goblin! Obtained [6]
[Scroll of Fireball]!
out-kungfu the dude
(5v6)He might be better at kung-fu than you. He punches you in the face.
Grab my severed arm and use it to knock the sword out of his hand, then whack him in the face with my severed arm
(4-1-1v5)You miss. The goblin stabs you.
---
[4]Mafia Santa breaks out of jail!
[5v5-1-1]The goblin swordmaster stabs Salsacookies, who is now nearly dead, again.
Night will fall in three turns.---
The Froggy Ninja has reached Level 3! [2]Gained one-use skill
[Ritual Boost: Life]!
Nunzillor has reached Level 2! [6]Gained
[Alcoholic+]!
Salsacookies has reached Level 1! [4]Learned [Pierces through head armour.][Piercing Face Punch][/abbr]!
Got
[Spiked Glove]!
Got
[Ham]!
---
Class: Vehicular Mage
Level: 3 [1/3]
Inventory: Empty
Equipment: [Clothes][Enchanted Tire Iron][Arcane Fuel Canister][Magic Wheels]
Money: $400
Possessions: [Magicycle]
Traits: None
Location: Outside Parking Lot
Class: Badass
Level: 3 [1/3]
Inventory: [Grenade]
Equipment: [Clothes][Cool Shades]
Money: $575
Possessions: [Motorcycle]
Traits: [Stubble][Badass+]
Location: City Streets
[/abbr]
Class: Santa Summoner
Level: 0 [2/3]
Inventory: Empty
Equipment: [Clothes]
Money: $0
Possessions: Sled
Traits: None
Location: Outside Parking Lot
Class: Ritual Master
Level: 3^ [0/3]
Inventory: [Boxes of Chalk][Book of Arcane Rituals]
Equipment: [Clothes][Sacrificial Knife]
Possessions: [Empty Warehouse]
Traits: [Ritual Master+]
Skills: [Insta-Ritual (1)][Ritual Boost: Life]
Location: Empty Warehouse
Class: Burrito Mage
Level: 2 [2/3]
Inventory: [Bag of Burrito Ingredients][Big Book of Burritos][Sandwich]
Equipment: [Clothes]
Money: $100
Traits: [Burrito Specialist]
Skills: [Burrito Blast]
Location: City Streets
Class: Generic Fighter
Level: 0 [1/3]
Inventory: [Half-eaten potato chips][Awesome Food]
Equipment: [Clothes]
Money:
Possessions: [Couch]
Traits: [Potatochipaphobia]
Location: Parking Lot Ruins
Status: [Arm Wound]
Class: Practical Pragmatist
Level: 1 [2/3]
Inventory: Empty
Equipment: [Clothes][Shard of glass][Knife][Vest]
Money:
Traits: None
Location: City Streets
Status:
Class: Alcoholic
Level: 2^ [0/3]
Inventory: [Stolen liquor][Beer][Wine]
Equipment: [Clothes]
Money:
Traits: [Alcoholic+]
Skills: [Drunken Punch]
Location: City Streets
Status: [Drunk (2)][Wounded]
Class: Seal Clubber
Level: 1 [1/3]
Inventory: [Club][Seal Hat][50 litres of seal blood]
Equipment: [Clothes]
Money:
Traits: None
Location: City Streets
Class: Explosiveist
Level: 2 [1/3]
Inventory: ["Mineralite"][Rock][Grenade][Time Bomb]
Equipment: [Clothes]
Money:
Traits: [Explosiveist+]
Skills: [Throw Explosive]
Location: City Streets
Class: GM
Level: 2 [1/3]
Inventory: [Old Netbook][Notepad]
Equipment: [Clothes]
Money:
+ $10
Traits: None
Location: Net Cafe
Class: Magical Chef
Level: 1 [2/3]
Inventory: [Mystery Meat]
Equipment: [Clothes][Chef's Knife]
Money:
Traits: [Magical Chef+]
Location: Outside Parking Lot
Class: Magical Healer
Level: 1 [1/3]
Inventory: Empty
Equipment: [Clothes]
Money:
Traits: None
Location: Outside Parking Lot
Class: Muscle Wizard
Level: 1 [2/3]
Inventory: [Scroll of Fireball]
Equipment: [Clothes][Body Armour][Power Glove][Muscle Hat]
Money:
Traits: None
Location: Outside Parking Lot
Class: Super Saiyan
Level: 1 [2/3]
Inventory: [Dragon Ball]
Equipment: [Clothes][Aura Orb][Headband]
Money:
Traits: None
Location: Ruined Parking Lot
Class: Balanced Magic-User
Level: 1 [1/3]
Inventory: [Fireball Wand]
Equipment: [Arcane Cloak][Staff of Balance]
Money:
Traits: None
Location: Outside Parking Lot
Class: ip-man
Level: 1 [2/3]
Inventory: Empty
Equipment: [Clothes]
Money:
Traits: None
Location: City Streets
Class: Ham-Fisted Face-Puncher
Level: 1^ [0/3]
Inventory: Empty
Equipment: [Clothes][Spiked Glove]
Money:
Traits: None
Skills: [Piercing Face Punch
Location: City Streets
Status: [Missing Right Arm][Severe Pain][Stabbed][Stabbed Again]
Mafia Santa: A santa with underworld connections. [Jail] {Permanent]
Class: Ballroom Dancer
Level: 0 [2/3]
Inventory: Empty
Equipment: [Clothes]
Money: $500
Traits: None
Location: Hotel
Edit: Found misplaced ham.