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Author Topic: Things that made you laugh today: some people notice when 1 change the title  (Read 1566005 times)

SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8076 guffaws and counting
« Reply #8340 on: January 26, 2018, 08:31:23 pm »

So my 13 year old kid has a friend over, and my 9 year old has been getting upset that they don't want to play with him...

Mom:  "So Hiro's friend tells me that you were trying to blackmail them?  That you were going to get them in trouble with me if they didn't include you?"

Grim: "What?... uhh... no?"

Me:  "Grim, do you know what blackmail means?"

Grim:  "I was only telling them what I didn't want to have to do, so they would listen to me!"

Me (laughing):  "Did you just tell us that it's not blackmail, because you were only threatening to blackmail them if you didn't get what you want?"

Mom (laughing):  "He doesn't know what blackmail means."
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In the land of twilight, under the moon
We dance for the idiots
As the end will come so soon
In the land of twilight

Maybe people should love for the sake of loving, and not with all of these optimization conditions.

Bumber

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8076 guffaws and counting
« Reply #8341 on: January 27, 2018, 12:37:22 am »

EA Sports will have to add vuvuzela droning into future games to be "more realistic" of course.

And shutting off the sound will require dlc
I can already imagine The Sims loading screens: "Distributing Vuvuzelas" along with "Reticulating Splines"
The more you play the game the more the second word gets replaced by "Vuvuzelas" until every single message is" ______ Vuvuzelas."  Then it starts replacing random letters with "z."  Till finally all the loading messages are just zzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.   Then the vuvuzela sound starts playing during loading screens, menus, and the pause screen.  Until it becomes a constant drone that plays equally loudly at all times while the game window is open.  At that point all in-game text starts getting random characters swapped out for the letter "z".

The gameplay begins to be interspersed at ever increasing intervals with stock footage of audience members playing the vuvazela at real life games.  The more you play, the more the colors on the screen start to become grey and indistinct.  If you for some reason keep playing at this point, the entire game is eventually replaced with nothing but TV static and the drone.

Even if you turn off the game its too late.  Your computer has already been infected with a ransomware virus from EA.  You begin to hear the drone even when the game isn't open.  All audio on all processes begins to be replaced with vuvazelas.  All characters begin to be randomly swapped out for the letter "z".  Each window and process is renamed to "All is the Drone.  The Drone is All."  The only way to stop it is to send money to EA.
Only it doesn't stop. You shut down your computer but it won't stop. You tear out the power cables but it won't stop. You run away but you can still hear it. That's when you realize it's too late for you.
Logged
Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

Doomblade187

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8076 guffaws and counting
« Reply #8342 on: January 27, 2018, 03:12:30 am »

EA Sports will have to add vuvuzela droning into future games to be "more realistic" of course.

And shutting off the sound will require dlc
I can already imagine The Sims loading screens: "Distributing Vuvuzelas" along with "Reticulating Splines"
The more you play the game the more the second word gets replaced by "Vuvuzelas" until every single message is" ______ Vuvuzelas."  Then it starts replacing random letters with "z."  Till finally all the loading messages are just zzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.   Then the vuvuzela sound starts playing during loading screens, menus, and the pause screen.  Until it becomes a constant drone that plays equally loudly at all times while the game window is open.  At that point all in-game text starts getting random characters swapped out for the letter "z".

The gameplay begins to be interspersed at ever increasing intervals with stock footage of audience members playing the vuvazela at real life games.  The more you play, the more the colors on the screen start to become grey and indistinct.  If you for some reason keep playing at this point, the entire game is eventually replaced with nothing but TV static and the drone.

Even if you turn off the game its too late.  Your computer has already been infected with a ransomware virus from EA.  You begin to hear the drone even when the game isn't open.  All audio on all processes begins to be replaced with vuvazelas.  All characters begin to be randomly swapped out for the letter "z".  Each window and process is renamed to "All is the Drone.  The Drone is All."  The only way to stop it is to send money to EA.
Only it doesn't stop. You shut down your computer but it won't stop. You tear out the power cables but it won't stop. You run away but you can still hear it. That's when you realize it's too late for you.
It comes.
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In any case it would be a battle of critical thinking and I refuse to fight an unarmed individual.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8076 guffaws and counting
« Reply #8343 on: January 27, 2018, 06:38:21 pm »

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Eric Blank

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8076 guffaws and counting
« Reply #8344 on: January 27, 2018, 07:47:36 pm »

Wait, there actually are braking thrusters on that thing.
He should have used the brakes
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

IronTomato

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8076 guffaws and counting
« Reply #8345 on: January 27, 2018, 11:06:42 pm »

The space train never has had, does not have, and most likely never will have brakes.
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Eric Blank

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8076 guffaws and counting
« Reply #8346 on: January 28, 2018, 01:03:43 am »

That must be the almost-space train then
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8076 guffaws and counting
« Reply #8347 on: January 28, 2018, 08:53:48 am »

The space train never has had, does not have, and most likely never will have brakes.
In space no one can hear the infernal choo choo

scourge728

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8582 chuckles and counting
« Reply #8348 on: January 28, 2018, 04:14:24 pm »

Gordon Ramsey insulting people's food via twitter

Ultimuh

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Eric Blank

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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

EnigmaticHat

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"T-take this non-euclidean geometry, h-humanity-baka. I m-made it, but not because I l-li-l-like you or anything! I just felt s-sorry for you, b-baka."
You misspelled seance.  Are possessing Draignean?  Are you actually a ghost in the shell? You have to tell us if you are, that's the rule

Bumber

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« Last Edit: January 28, 2018, 11:29:16 pm by Bumber »
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

IronTomato

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8582 chuckles and counting
« Reply #8353 on: January 29, 2018, 12:49:09 am »

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EnigmaticHat

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Re: Things that made you laugh today: 8582 chuckles and counting
« Reply #8354 on: January 29, 2018, 12:53:34 pm »

When I was a kid I set out to destroy the Grox entirely and turn the center of the galaxy into a densly populated hub of life by planting monoliths.  It turns out that terraforming Grox worlds to max habitability wipes them out instantly (unlike normal races who get left with a bubble city).

Sadly my quest of heroic (?) genocide was stopped by upgrading to an expansion, which made me unable to play my save :(
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"T-take this non-euclidean geometry, h-humanity-baka. I m-made it, but not because I l-li-l-like you or anything! I just felt s-sorry for you, b-baka."
You misspelled seance.  Are possessing Draignean?  Are you actually a ghost in the shell? You have to tell us if you are, that's the rule
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