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Poll

What style do you prefer?

Silly
- 21 (28.8%)
Grimdark, "war is hell"
- 24 (32.9%)
Romance (Note: not actually going to write this)
- 28 (38.4%)

Total Members Voted: 72


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Author Topic: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: It's alive!  (Read 30315 times)

SaberToothTiger

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: The Cavlarying.
« Reply #75 on: July 02, 2014, 07:36:04 pm »

More or less.
Get yer equipment and horses!
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I gaze into its milky depths, searching the wheat and sugar for the meanings I can never find.
It's like tea leaf divination, but with cartoon leprechauns.
There are only two sure things in life: death and taxes and lists and poor arithmetic and overlong jokes and poor memory and probably a few more things.

Sheb

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: The Cavlarying.
« Reply #76 on: July 03, 2014, 05:27:39 pm »


Вы - Советская Атомная Кавалерия, Ход Второй: Каждый получает пони!



March 3rd, 1943

As you look at the horses, you envy your comrades that managed to get to the Waitlistnyev IPL. They seems... odd, slightly pulsating, and you cannot help but feel slightly sick as you approach them. Surely it is only psychological?

Near each of the horses is a backpack containing the equipment you requested.

Grigori Ursine looks at his empty backpack and cry a bearly tear as it thinks about the discrimination facing LGBT (Lynx, Grey Wolves, Bear, Tiger) people in the USSR. For all their talks of "All species united under Communism", bears like him still face specieism and discrimination at every turn. Yet again, he'll have to go to the front unarmed because of humano-centrists weapons designers.

Still, it's better than on the other side of the frontline. Despite the harsh censorship designed to prevent panic among the population, horrible rumors of the treatment of bears are coming from the other side. Getthos, vast camps, bears treated as little more than beasts. Some even pretend Hitler visit his troops wearing a bearskin coat!

Grigori Ursine may have been appoint the the Soviet Nuclear Cavalry as a token of the USSR's inclusiveness for propaganda purpose, but he'll show them all what a bear can do! He'll fight for as long as a single bear stay interned in those camps!






As you harness your horses, a man in a white labcoat arrives.

Quote from: Dr. Sergarrski
Well men, I hope you'll treat my children well. Well, they're not literally my children of course, but you know what I mean. Since they're nuclear, they don't actually need to eat or sleep or rest, they are powered by a natural uranium reactor in their guts. They still like carrots though.

Of course, they should have plenty of water do drink, for cooling purpose. 40 or 50 liters a day should be enough. One of our stableboy forgot to water the horses, and the results were most interesting. We're still looking into it, but I'm certain we'll find some parts to send to his family eventually.

Oh, and of course, take care not to injure them. They tend to do BAD THING when hurt. Which usually results in more hurt all around. So please take care of them, they're dear boys when they're not using their cancer ray to fry your brain.

Sadly, before you can ask how this cancer ray work the doctor walks away, muttering to himself. It seems at least one brain was fried.

As you wonder where you could by a pair of lead underpants, the important-looking-officer address you once more.

Quote from: Lieutenant-Colonel Sheboskov
Comrades, now that you have your equipment, let me tell you about your mission. We've bloodied the fascists this winter, but as soon as the rasputitsa is over, they'll launch a great spring offensive. GRU thinks their target will be the Kursk salient, and we've spent large part of winter reinforcing it.

As a first mission, and to test your horses' capabilities, you'll go on a reconnaissance mission on the southern side of the salient. Go there, identify their units and try to capture an officer for information.

If you don't have any question, you are free to go now, the front is a mere 10 km away. If you do have question, I'm sure your Commissar will be able to make sure you don't have questions anymore.

Make us proud comrade, Stalin is watching you!
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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

Helgoland

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #77 on: July 03, 2014, 05:38:26 pm »

Do we have a plan? Or do we just ride there and see what we can do?
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Arguably he's already a progressive, just one in the style of an enlightened Kaiser.
I'm going to do the smart thing here and disengage. This isn't a hill I paticularly care to die on.

SaberToothTiger

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #78 on: July 03, 2014, 05:40:16 pm »

Before I go, I pet my horse and say:

"You will do great, I can see it in your eyes."

After encouraging the horse I follow my leader.
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I gaze into its milky depths, searching the wheat and sugar for the meanings I can never find.
It's like tea leaf divination, but with cartoon leprechauns.
There are only two sure things in life: death and taxes and lists and poor arithmetic and overlong jokes and poor memory and probably a few more things.

Sheb

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #79 on: July 03, 2014, 05:41:22 pm »

Well, you're the leader Helgoland. :p
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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

SaberToothTiger

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #80 on: July 03, 2014, 05:41:53 pm »

I think that I could sneak up there, spy a little, return and relay the intel to you, because I don't feel confident enough to enter a Nazi camp and kidnap an officer without backup.
Logged
I gaze into its milky depths, searching the wheat and sugar for the meanings I can never find.
It's like tea leaf divination, but with cartoon leprechauns.
There are only two sure things in life: death and taxes and lists and poor arithmetic and overlong jokes and poor memory and probably a few more things.

Helgoland

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #81 on: July 03, 2014, 05:45:36 pm »

Okay, we'll wing it - I'd suggest waiting for a patrol to ambush, but the terrain is a decisive factor in such a course of action being viable.
Oleg then pirouettes onto his horse and leads the way.
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The Bay12 postcard club
Arguably he's already a progressive, just one in the style of an enlightened Kaiser.
I'm going to do the smart thing here and disengage. This isn't a hill I paticularly care to die on.

Sheb

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #82 on: July 03, 2014, 05:53:52 pm »

I'm both relieved and surprised none of you asked for a Katyusha MLRS or an IL-2 Sturmovik as a weapon.
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Quote from: Paul-Henry Spaak
Europe consists only of small countries, some of which know it and some of which don’t yet.

SaberToothTiger

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #83 on: July 03, 2014, 05:56:57 pm »

Hey, I have a magical pony, I do not need an airplane!
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I gaze into its milky depths, searching the wheat and sugar for the meanings I can never find.
It's like tea leaf divination, but with cartoon leprechauns.
There are only two sure things in life: death and taxes and lists and poor arithmetic and overlong jokes and poor memory and probably a few more things.

Aseaheru

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #84 on: July 03, 2014, 06:33:26 pm »

Nor do they need a truck full of rockets.
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Warning, nearly incapable of expressing tone in text

Helgoland

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #85 on: July 03, 2014, 06:34:48 pm »

I'm both relieved and surprised none of you asked for a Katyusha MLRS or an IL-2 Sturmovik as a weapon.
I was gonna ask for a jet as a side-arm...
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The Bay12 postcard club
Arguably he's already a progressive, just one in the style of an enlightened Kaiser.
I'm going to do the smart thing here and disengage. This isn't a hill I paticularly care to die on.

Aseaheru

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #86 on: July 03, 2014, 06:54:51 pm »

Going to have to wait a few years for that one. :P
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smurfingtonthethird

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #87 on: July 03, 2014, 07:00:03 pm »

Tavish doesn't speak a word of Russian, so he shrugs and decides to down some of the complementary booze.
« Last Edit: July 03, 2014, 09:27:00 pm by smurfingtonthethird »
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RIP Moot ;-;7 Sigtext!

SaberToothTiger

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #88 on: July 03, 2014, 08:30:32 pm »

Oh, oh! Before I forget, ask the military officer for binoculars and a knife for this assignment.
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I gaze into its milky depths, searching the wheat and sugar for the meanings I can never find.
It's like tea leaf divination, but with cartoon leprechauns.
There are only two sure things in life: death and taxes and lists and poor arithmetic and overlong jokes and poor memory and probably a few more things.

BFEL

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Re: You Are Soviet Nuclear Cavalry: Oh fuck, history!
« Reply #89 on: July 03, 2014, 09:04:47 pm »

((Bearly tears are best tears :P
Also Bears==Jews?!?))

Grigori saddles up on Claw Marx and waits for the others to get ready.
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7/10 Has much more memorable sigs but casts them to the realm of sigtexts.

Indeed, I do this.
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