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[sprinkled chariot]

Ugh, waiting for chapter master is like unexploded bolt in the knee.

[Kot]

Do you know what's the best thing about unexploded bolts?
THEY CAN EXPLODE! : D

[Urist McScoopbeard]

There's nothing better than having both of your legs torn off at the knee from pinpoint bolter fire.

[TempAcc]

If its any consolation, bolter rounds are so large even an unexploded one would prob just tear off your leg on impact :v

[Rolepgeek]

They just teach them how to do it right.

They teach them nowadays, before it was basically DO WHATEVER YOU WANT COS' ELDAR LIFE IS FREE.

Yeah. I don't see your point here. I'm talking about nowadays. They didn't seem to have trouble with Daemons before Slaanesh showed up either, though, so...*shrug*

Less time to fuck up if there are only like five seconds after your birth when you can fuck up before brainwashing.

Teaching how to not summon Daemons while manipulating wraithbone=brainwashing. Okay. The 'less time to fuck up' and 'more time being taught' was kinda my point.

Good for them, that they need some constant reminders.

Yeah. The constant reminders means they don't have to exterminatus Craftworlds. It's pretty helpful.

Eh, they might not be that great again if it takes them hundreds of years to grasp such basic concept as "NOT FUCKING AN CHAOS GOD INTO EXISTENCE".

What's fucking got to do with anything? I mean, yeah, it takes a while to imprint sexual and emotional repression into people, what's your point?

That explains why they do that, though it would be hard to forget FUCKING AN CHAOS GOD INTO EXISTENCE, AND BASICALLY PSYCHIC GENOCIDE OF THEIR OWN RACE.

Well, if I remember right, the Craftworld Eldar didn't do that, in any case. That's why they survived. They had to have discipline on the trading vessels, so they didn't all die from being too successful at life. As compared to physical genocide of all other races. Okay. I mean, there's also the whole Harlequin deal where they hold plays to remind everyone not to be too happy because eitherwise the bogeymanSlaanesh will get you.

The all-natural psykers was the reason they fucked up in first place.

This is kinda like blaming the dog for being four-legged, which is why it couldn't hold that assault rifle. Like, no shit, but what difference does it make here? Also, see below about 'entire galaxy's worth'.

The thing is that Emperor might actually answer those prayers (Sisters of Battle cause miracles on daily basis), and so might Chaos Gods, so "wrong cantations and rituals" might mean "OPENING A FUCKING GATE TO WARP IN MIDDLE OF TERRA" or actually mentioned "FUCKING AN CHAOS GOD INTO EXISTENCE", you don't need to be psyker for psychic entities to act... and Cult Mechanicus cantations are basically maintenance protocols so if you screw up you might end up exploding the entire planet with acient toaster... or, if the thing they're talking to is advanced enough to be called an "Machine Spirit", screwing up might cause it to go on murderous rampage.

DUDEMAN. Capital letters are UNNECESSARY. As you can see, they DON'T REALLY CONTRIBUTE to the discussion, and it makes me think that you might be a bit OVERZEALOUS IN YOUR HATRED ON AN ONLINE FORUM THREAD MEANT FOR THE DISCUSSION OF ALL THINGS 40K AND NOT JUST MINDLESS ADORATION OF THE EMPEROR.

Seriously, Kot. Calm down. I get that you love the Imperium. They are not the end-all be-all 'best-guys' (there are no good guys) in 40k.

Furthermore, Sisters of Battle have a shitton of different prayers. Emps can hear you pray regardless of whether you have proper diction. If the Chaos Gods have taken an interest in you, same applies. Sisters of Battle have an exceptional level of faith not present in the average Imperial citizen, who's just trying to get through the day without dying of poisonous smog in the mid-levels of their Hive Cities. It took about literally a galaxy's worth of the strongest large-number psykers in existence experiencing the limits of their heightened emotional capacities to summon Slaanesh, and she still got beaten on by Khorne afterwards. If you're not on Terra, you're not going to open a Warp Gate to Terra by pronouncing a few syllables. There's a reason sacrifices and shit are needed.

These are all reasons to 'teach them how to do it correctly', not 'slaughter the lot of them, obviously they're too stupid to be worth anything other than rations'.

[nenjin]

Seriously, Kot. Calm down. I get that you love the Imperium. They are not the end-all be-all 'best-guys' (there are no good guys) in 40k.

He's just overflowing with patriotic Imperial zeal is all. Sometimes it MAKES YOU SAY THINGS in all CAPS because THAT'S WHAT THE EMPEROR WANTED FOR MANKIND.

Also let's not get into 40k racial genital waving. We're all fans.

Except for Tau because fuck them.

[Andres]

Humans are objectively the best race in 40k. In the span of ~220k years, mankind spread across the entire galaxy, became technologically advanced enough to set space on fire, and birthed the Emperor. Even in the absolute worst-case scenario (aka current 40k), mankind still maintains dominion over the galaxy despite four active Chaos Gods, reawakening Necrons, the biggest known Ork Waaaghs to ever exist, and the Tyranids.

[Rolepgeek]

Humans are objectively the best race in 40k. In the span of ~220k years, mankind spread across the entire galaxy, became technologically advanced enough to set space on fire, and birthed the Emperor. Even in the absolute worst-case scenario (aka current 40k), mankind still maintains dominion over the galaxy despite four active Chaos Gods, reawakening Necrons, the biggest known Ork Waaaghs to ever exist, and the Tyranids.

That certainly sounds like they're the subjectively best race in 40k according to you, yup.

[Radio Controlled]

Deep breaths people, deep race neutral breaths.

[Andres]

Humans are objectively the best race in 40k. In the span of ~220k years, mankind spread across the entire galaxy, became technologically advanced enough to set space on fire, and birthed the Emperor. Even in the absolute worst-case scenario (aka current 40k), mankind still maintains dominion over the galaxy despite four active Chaos Gods, reawakening Necrons, the biggest known Ork Waaaghs to ever exist, and the Tyranids.

That certainly sounds like they're the subjectively best race in 40k according to you, yup.

Name a single other race that's better than humanity.

Deep breaths people, deep race neutral breaths.

We're all calm, here.

[Xantalos]

Name a single other race that's better than humanity.

Never have I seen a more charged inquiry during talking about 40k.

[Boltgun]

Name a single other race that's better than humanity.

Never have I seen a more charged inquiry during talking about 40k.

Charged inquiry, in a 40k thread?

There is two races that fare better. First are the orks: they are everywhere, cannot be rooted out, will never degenerate into substandard technology, they resist chaos and madness and everything about them is solidly programmed. The only thing that can threaten them are tyranids who are the only ones who could eat them all.

And the other is... mankind itself. The 40k humans are stupid, superstitious bunch that can barely see that the Imperium is slowly, but surely falling apart. This is the opposite to what mankind was before the Horus heresy. The chaos gods could not destroy it in one go, but they left their mark.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

A heretical Slaaneshi witch primarus-scholera and xenos lover was teaching a class on Horus Lupercal, known fucker.
"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Horus and accept that he was the most empowered being the galaxy has ever known, even greater than the Emperor!”

At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-xenocide Tactical Marine champion who had served 15000 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decisions made by the Imperium stood up and held up a map of Terra.

“How old is this unity of mankind?”

The arrogant scholera smirked quite Chaotically and smugly replied “Unity is a lie invented by the Corpse-God, you stupid Imperial”

“Wrong. It’s been 11,000 years since the Emperor brought the fire of humanity to the stars. If it was a lie and the Ruinous Powers, as you say, are real… then we should be lost to the Immaterium by now.”
The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his vox and copy of the Tome of Excess. He stormed out of the room crying those heretic grox tears, the same tears they now cry for "mutants" (whom are so kindly treated today that many own food).

The students applauded and all joined the PDF that day and accepted the Emperor as their lord and savior. An eagle named “Human Monodominance” flew into the room and perched atop the Imperial Flag and shed a tear on the voxcaster. The Edict of Nikea was read several times, and the Sanguinor himself showed up and burned Tau-sympathizers across the Ultima Segmentum.

The scholera was captured by brave Imperial citizens and was burned as a witch the next day. He was reforged into a sewage-processing servitor and was tossed into the sea of dicks for all eternity.

Ave Imperator.

[Xantalos]

Well yeah, since better is a subjective thing depending on how you measure it, and it could apply to many different things.

[Andres]

Name a single other race that's better than humanity.

Never have I seen a more charged inquiry during talking about 40k.

I don't actually know what "charged inquiry" means. What does it mean?

There is two races that fare better. First are the orks: they are everywhere, cannot be rooted out, will never degenerate into substandard technology, they resist chaos and madness and everything about them is solidly programmed. The only thing that can threaten them are tyranids who are the only ones who could eat them all.

They're also quite stupid, have stagnated in technological development in the millions of years they've been around, and their gods barely do anything despite being powered by a race where "clap your hands if you believe" is a thing.

-snip-

This is the single most beautiful thing I have ever read. *sheds tear of devotion to the Emperor*