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[Twinwolf]

"No, I didn't I don't think. One second he was in neutral position, the next he was pointing the gun. It's likely, I think, that it was hidden, since the people viewing the trial can't see the judge's whole body, but that's just speculation on my part."

[endlessblaze]

"have you ever seen the defendant draw any other weapon at all? at any point in time"

[Twinwolf]

"I have not."

((At an airport, likely won't be able to post more today))

[Tawa]

"Is that everything, defence?"

[Tawa]

"Defence?"

[endlessblaze]

"almost, if the defendant would please make his statement to the court"

[TheBiggerFish]

"The defense is reminded that this is not the time."

[endlessblaze]

"what time is it again?"

[TheBiggerFish]

"This is the cross-examination of the witness."

[Tawa]

"So you're done with the cross-examination? Very well, then. Witness, you may leave the stand."


"So, defence. You request the defendant's statement? One step ahead of you; we already had it on record. We did interrogate him, after all. くらえ!"

"The statement reads, in its entirety:"
"I thought that weapon was a stun gun. I keep one on me at all times."
"I was going to taze the defendant and send him back to custody to give him a proper trial at a different court."
"I pulled it out and fired without thinking! I'm innocent, I tell you!"


"So, that's well and good and all. But the prosecution posits that the defendant"

"IS LYING!"

Confess the Truth 2015

Defendant's Statement added to the Court Record.


"And before His Lordship asks why the prosecution has not presented this evidence beforehand, I have this excellent article on American discovery law he may be interested in, link in the phrase 'American discovery law'."

"Suffice it to say... all the defence needed do before this was ask if he wanted it, so long as he revealed his own evidence unto the court in exchange. But the defence did not ask before the trial; ergo, I get to keep all my evidence to myself to present when dramatically appropriate!"

"And before you consider the fact that we are in Britain, please recall that the GM is a lazy, American, metaphorical bum who can't be bothered to do his own research."

[IcyTea31]

"Such a waste of good wine."

[TheBiggerFish]

"I see.  As the pre-trial phase was unaccountably timeskipped and no motions could have been filed, I suppose you're in the right, although I'm rather annoyed."

"Would the prosecution please elaborate on their recent dramatic accusation?  Why, exactly, do you think the defendant is lying in a presumably sworn statement?"

[Tawa]

"The defendant, you see, is totally incompetent in regards to the law. Seeing as he was unaware that assault is illegal--mind, even taking his statement into account, he has still broken the law, albeit in a lesser regard--we cannot possibly assume he realizes that lying under oath is yet another crime. And, of course, the defendant immediately attempted to have his crime ignored in favor of a civil trial. Citations in underlined dialogue."

"Defence! Are you prepared to give in?"

[TheBiggerFish]

"Would the prosecution please shut it and stop spouting nonsensical assertions that aren't even supported by the evidence they collected?  Thanks."

"The defendant, you see, is totally incompetent in regards to the law.^{[dubious - discuss]} Seeing as he was unaware that assault is illegal^{[citation needed][dubious - discuss]}--mind, even taking his statement into account, he has still broken the law, albeit in a lesser regard^{[citation needed][dubious - discuss]}--we cannot possibly assume he realizes that lying under oath is yet another crime^{[citation needed][dubious - discuss]}. And, of course, the defendant immediately attempted to have his crime ignored^{[not supported by cited evidence, docket scheduling has nothing to do with whether or not a crime is being 'ignored']} in favor of a civil trial. Citations in underlined dialogue."

"Defence! Are you prepared to give in?"

"There we- Carp, everything is purple.  You get the point, I presume?"

[Gwolfski]

"Oh dear. It appears we got small script. This is gonna be very time consuming."