Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Tawa]

"Hoh hoh. I like your ztyle. Geet een here, TRASHYMAN!"

"YOU CALL"

"Yes. Pleeze, tell zee defense just how WRONK zey are."

Cross-Examination ~ Presto 2009


"SORRY IF ENGLISH RUSTY, HERE FROM SHANGDAO"
"FOUGHT RIVAL AT THE ROUTE GATE OUTSIDE THE CITY"
"HE HAD ON SPECIAL ELF MONSTER FIGHTING GLOVES"
"I SENT OUT MY ELF MONSTER WHEN THE POLICE ARRESTED"

"Vell, zere you haff it. Zee knife had no finkerprints on eet, ant here eez proof zat zee defentant woult not haff left zee prints. Zere vere no ozzer people een zee city viz gloffs, accordink to zee police. Ant zee lemon goffernment agents vere een no way possibly responsible, as zee goffernment agent has proofen."

"Ant to zee eenveesible neenja-voice, zee police checked zee earlier vitnesss' recorts ant fount zat Victreebell vas zee only Pokémon zee vitness effer hat."

[TheBiggerFish]

"NO other people with gloves, Von Karma?  Quite the assertion you're making there.  Also, I found that there was no sign of  gloves when the defendant was arrested in the actual records, page 81(25ppp)?  Hmm?
Or, in other words, objection, Your Honor."
The self-satisfied sound of a pen clicking echoes through the room.

[FelixSparks]

"OBJECTION!"

Kamina slams his hands down on the desk, and points dramatically at TRASHYMAN.

"Look back at this photo I had taken in the defense lobby, IMMEDIATELY after Ethan was arrested."

Kamina points to page 135 of the thread, a smirk on his face.

"Notice anything, Von Karma?"

[Tawa]

Pursuit ~ Cornered - Variation

"I do nacht see zee gloffs. Vitness? Explain."

"THE GLOVES WERE OF SKIN COLOR, SEE YOU?"

[TheBiggerFish]

"I do nacht see zee gloffs. Vitness? Explain."
"THE GLOVES WERE OF SKIN COLOR, SEE YOU?"

"No, see we not.  How could YOU have?"

[FelixSparks]

"Oh really? Then how did you know he was wearing them?!" Another desk slam, and the grin grows wider.

"In addition, you lied when you said you had sent out your pokemon! Both the police report and the photos show that the fight hadn't started, and that Ethan was going to send out his pokemon first! WITNESS!" THUD. He slams a fist on the desk, and points at Trashyman once more. "You are aware of the penalties of lying under oath, correct?!"

[TheBiggerFish]

"In addition, you lied when you said you had sent out your pokemon! Both the police report and the photos show that the fight hadn't started, and that Ethan was going to send out his pokemon first!"

"Indeed."

[Tawa]

Victory Is Right Before Your Eyes!

"No, see we not.  How could YOU have?"

"I... I..."

-snip-

"I... I AM A MONSTER
COACH
AND ALSO
A MONSTER
BECAUSE I
GAVE HIM PILLORY"

EN'STRASHYMAN FAINT!
TRASHY MAN ISN'T IN HERE!
TRASHY MAN SCENE OF BLANK!

"NEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN"

[poketwo]

"Now, we proceed to standard court procedure on finding the guy who did this!"

[FelixSparks]

Kamina grins and cracks his knuckles.

"Well. I think that proves my client had nothing to do with this. Your Honor? If I may?"

[TheBiggerFish]

"Pillory?
Off the record, Von Karma, please calm down before you burst something."

[Tawa]

"Well, that was certainly an interesting trial. More interesting, anyway, than that last one where the defense found the real killer in a matter of minutes the second trial day."

"I will now deliver my verdict. This court finds the defendant, Ethan No-last-name..."
Not Guilty

"This court is adjourned!"

Spoiler: Unfortunately Repetitive Gavel Animation (click to show/hide)

"Pillory?"

(The rival's name and lines were a reference to Pokémon Vietnamese Crystal, an English-translated Vietnamese bootleg of the Chinese bootleg of the Japanese version of Pokémon Crystal, translating "Pokémon" as variously "elf" or "monster" and bringing us immortal lines like "I AM A MONSTER (line break) COACH, THE FIRST MANKIND ALL OVER THE WORLD" and "THIS WAS THE THING ABOUT THREE YEARS AGO. TEAM MISSLE BOMB MADE USE OF MONSTERS TO DO EVILS." "[ELF] HAVE A PILLORY" was what it said when you put a Pokémon back in its ball.)

Won the Case! ~ Victory

"Excellent work back there. Shame the cuppy fellow missed it, he was a damned good lawyer."

[FelixSparks]

Before Kamina leaves, he SLUGS Von Karma in the face.

"Maybe next time, actually DO an investigation before you blame innocents. How's the bullet wound, by the way?"

He grins and exits the court, nodding.

"Thanks. I'm just glad everyone made it out of here okay. I wonder if we're gonna track down the real villain now... That's always fun."

[Tawa]

"...I take it you don't speak Shangdao? He confessed on the stand."

[TheBiggerFish]

"...I take it you don't speak Shangdao? He confessed on the stand."

"No, I do not.  But that was quite easy."