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[Thexor]

You do NOT freeken want to know what Jake says if you keep swag on...

I hated Jake SOOO MUCH that I was pissed off for the next hour.

Now i am curious.

I am too... my playthrough is swag-free. For reasons that largely include my personal sanity.

[Cerol Lenslens]

Well, I see the level cap isn't just removed for the enemy trainers. Fair's fair, I guess.

[Akura]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Finally made it to Constance City, the last city in the game(assuming that there isn't, in fact, another region as I suspect). Before I go challenge Dad at the Hall of Masters, I should check out the rest of the town.

First, the Pokémon Center.




"the city. It's not a very good design, but hey, it works."

So basically, you built a city floating thousands of feet in the air, using magnets and staples, and you think the design is poor?

I suppose that it truly is Dad's hometown. Everyone here is insane.


"route next to Blackfist. I heard there was a Fairy-type in there, that may help you a lot!"

Already got Delta Machamp. In fact, he's right behind me, but you can't see him because he doesn't have a sprite.


"Only people with special permission from Wilson may enter."

Huh, I wonder what's inside. Something to do with Varlox Cave? Or the Time Caller? I'm sure Dad will let me in.



Ooh, a Safari Zone. I suppose it must have another legendary like Landorus, Thundurus, and Tornadus. Come to think of it, there's two empty spaces in the Pokédex between Thundurus and Landorus. Odd, since the Mythologist in the Secret Base mentioned there was only three. I'll check it out in a little bit.


"I can't quite put my finger on it. I feel it would work really with with a Psychic-type Pokémon, but it didn't react to any of mine. If you can figure out what it reacts to, I can give it to you."

I'm gonna guess it's an Alakazamite. I don't know how many other Psychic-type Megas there are besides Alakazam and Medicham, and I already have the Medichamite.


"Sometimes, I see faint carvings etched in them. The carving look and awful amount like Zapdos, Moltres, and Articuno..."

Interesting.


"Shop! We've been researching ancient technology, and our smart Hall Leader Wilson has found an old piece of technology that's very useful! These Attack Boxes let a Pokémon use a move they cannot normally use, straight from the item itself! For example, using the Attack Box:Protect would let you use Protect, even if your Pokémon didn't know it! There are many drawbacks to this, however, Using and Attack Box can damage the space-time continuum to the point where- Ah, never mind. The point is, you can only use one Attack Box per battle. Also, there is a type of Attack Box called a Rare Box. Rare Boxes are an original piece of technology that our Attack Boxes are based off of. They are extremely difficulty to find and they'll break on use because they're so fragile. However, they often contain very powerful moves! I hope that makes sense! I hope you have a good time with Attack Boxes!"

What. They damage the space-time continuum? Considering how screwed it already is, I think I may want to avoid these things.

The Attack Boxes available in this shop are Protect, Sleep Powder, Thunder Wave, Toxic, Confuse Ray, Medusa Ray, and False Swipe. Most of these aren't particularly useful anyway.



That beats how I got here.



(._.)



Here's those statues with the legendary birds.


"stone."





They look like Secret Base entrances. Come to think of it, an NPC in Superior City mentioned that the base entrance there was supposed to be where Ho-oh died in the past.

Anyways, on to the Safari Zone before fighting Dad.



As I look around for where I can find a legendary. I catch some more mundane Pokémon.







The description of Altaria. Shows how beautiful it is then suddenly flaming death.

I looked all over the area, and I didn't find anywhere that might lead to a legendary. I also missed out on a few, but that was a pretty good Safari run anyway.

And now, to the Hall of Masters.



I can do this. I can do this. Actually I probably should train Team Sparkle a bit. Meh, I'll try them out on the Hall's trainers first.



Of course, the trainers are Scientists. After all, Dad is the scienciest Scientist of them all.

Come to think of it, how did he and Mom meet? Why did they divorce?

Ah, forget it, too much information right now.



My battle style is Shift.



Huh, he opened up with Mawile. I would see this as a problem if it wasn't for the fact that D. Machamp has DynamicPunch. I beat it, but only with a lucky confusion damage.

Next was Altaria. He did poor damage to Cresselia, who took him down with two Ice Beams.

Third was Druddigon. I swapped out first to D. Machamp to feed him some EXP, then switched to Cresselia. Cresselia was first confused by Rock Climb, then taken down with Outrage. I sent out D. Machamp while it was Outraging to try and heal with Draining Kiss, but Fairy's immunity to Dragon also nullifies Outrage's user-confusion effect. In the end, Victreebel finished him off.

Last was Flygon. Victreebel Spored it and Leaf Bladed it.



I'll say. Looks I'm spending the day grinding Team Sparkle.

While training on Mount Nova, I caught this in a random encounter.



That's some insane weight. It's name is similar to Heatran's, so did I just catch a legendary?

His attack is average(207), but his defense is insane, 338 when I caught it. His other stats are pathetic.

Hmm, it doesn't really seem to be a legendary, since they're actually a fairly common encounter.

I had completely forgotten that I blew through here with a Max Repel, and I'm catching more Ice-types.



That is one scary face.



The reason why every episode with Jynx was banned in the US was because she looks like a blackface hooker. If I remember correctly, in the Christmas episode, one tried to actually rape Brock.

There was also a Froslass up here, but I've only encountered it once and I wasn't in a position to screenshot its capture so I didn't catch it. Tried for quite a long time to find another, but she never appeared.

After a long time training, I get Cresselia and D. Machamp up to Lv.95. Still a fairly large level difference, but it should still be enough. I've taken things on with a bigger difference.



Well, I wouldn't be here if I didn't think I had a chance.



Only three? Crap.

Maybe not, first was Druddigon against Cresselia. Druddigon was roughly the same level as the previous trainer. Cresselia exchanged Ice Beams with his Outrage, doing similar damage to each other. Cressie was faster and took him down.

Second was Kingra. I decided to use Heliolisk for this one. A critical Thunderbolt took Kingdra down to 1/8th HP, while Heliolisk was brought down to 1/5th from Hydro Cannon. A Parabolic Charge finished Kingdra.

Last was Dragonite. Sent D. Machamp but decided to take a turn to heal Cresselia, just in case. That was a bit of a bad idea. First Dragonite used Hurricane and then Hyper Beam. D. Machamp went down. I switch to Cresselia to use Ice Beam during the recharge. A critical hit took Dragonite down in one shot.



Luck had little to do with it.

That went better than the last one. Now, there's just one left: my (alleged) bastard half-brother. A quick stop at the PokéCenter and putting D. Machamp in front.



You realize that you're the unloved offspring of a major felony, don't you?



Did they seriously make a recent change to the rule requiring going through the Quasar League before challenging the Sigil Halls?



What exactly are you doing for your mother? She and Wilson are already engaged.



First was Ursaring, who was Lv.111. The previous guy had a Lv.109 team. Somehow, I feel worried about this. He opened with Facade, which did full damage to D. Machamp, for some reason. Maybe Ursaring has an ability that negates type ineffectiveness or something. She also has a Toxic Orb. Another Facade and D. Machamp goes down. Then Ursaring one-shotted Lucario with Earthquake. Heliolisk finally takes the damn bear down.

Exploud was next. Took two Earthquakes from Excadrill to take it down, and he lost a good chunk of health from a Surf that Exploud used.

Third was Snorlax. Had Victreebel to Spore it to quickly remove it's Chesto Berry, then Spored it again. A critical Leaf Blade took it down next.

Togekiss was fourth. While I'm not quite sure whether it to call it a bird or not, it should be pretty obvious what Heliolisk did. Unfortunately, she took an Aura Sphere in the process but this time she tanked it.

Fifth was Lickilicky. With two team members down and three others badly hurt, I Spore him to buy some time to heal up. After wasting a good number of Hyper Potions, Lickilicky took Victreebel out with Body Slam. I managed to get D. Machamp back up to full health in that time. Although Lickilicky appeared to have either Own Tempo or Clear Body, DynamichPunch still broke him.

Last was Dunsparce. Tried to have Lucario paralyze him with Force Palm, but he instead paralyzed Lucario with Body Slam. Damn RNG. When he used Dig, I sent out Cresselia(has Levitate). Two Ice Beams finished this.



Um, are you even sure he's really your father?




"Waaah!"

Well, if he's your biological father, and he's going to marry your mother, then probably?

That's that bastard out of the way. Before going on, I run over to Blackfist to stock up on some more medicine including some stat-boosters. While there, I noticed the "Wings" set of boosters, which cost Ł3000, don't increase the stat, so I assume they increase the IV of the stat. I spent a crapton of money here, I hope it was enough.



Hi Dad! Mustn't stab him just yet. Gotta learn the truth about Stewart first.







Oh, I'd be disappointed if you held back against me. And the last thing I need is more disappointment in my dad.



Not counting the god controlled by a raving nutter, the other god controlled by the other raving nutter, and et cetera et cetera.







The hell? He made a cyborg out of Flygon?

This... thing put out some damage, but luckily D. Machamp pushed her to the point where Wilson used his Full Restores on her. I had to use two of my own as well. Some of the damage was boosted by her Drought ability.



She went down from recoil damage from Solar Charge.



Just what the hell is THAT supposed to be?



Had to use a Hyper Potion to keep Lucario alive after it used Bullet Hail. Luckily, none of its attacks were really effective.



That one is downright frightening. I'm assuming that something with a double-type disadvantage would have something to rapidly kill a Fairy-type.

He kept using Flare Blitz, and I kept using Full Restores while Hydreigon kept getting hurt with recoil. Some would say that's cheap, but those Full Restores are not cheap. I have plenty though.



You know, if you're opponent is tanking an attack that hurts you more than it hurts them, then you stop using that attack.



He strapped rocket engines to Salamence's back... Isn't this kind of experimentation highly illegal? I just hope it's still Dragon/Flying.



Despite being faster(and with Speed Boost), it didn't act first on the second turn. Probably was using Focus Punch or a similar move. Now, for the next abomination.



I met this one before. I still don't know what the hell it's type is supposed to be. It looks like it has a saddle, so I assume Dad made this one to be a personal transport?



A critical Devour took Cresselia down before I could use Moonlight(which would have been a high heal since it's still sunny from RizeFlygon).

I send out Victreebel to take advantage of the weather.

After getting most of the team back up to full, I switch to D. Machamp the same turn Megasparce wakes up and attempts to Devour him.

As I try to use Play Rough, Dad withdraws Megasparce and sends in...



He appears to be a Dragon/Steel-type, since Play Rough did normal damage.



He used Terraforce, which was super-effective against D. Machamp. Not sure what type it was. Possibly Ghost, which means Cresselia is staying away from this thing.

Instead, Excadrill Earthquakes him.



Steel-type confirmed. Abomination destroyed.



...I'm having trouble being as proud of you, Dad. Highly unethical experiments on Pokémon? Having an affair with an underage girl? Ignoring the child that resulted from that? If you weren't my father, and the fact that I've seen worse, I'd say you were one of the worst people in the world.

Anyways, back to the fight. After failing with Stun Spore three times in a row, I just use Spore and get Cresselia out.

Cressie has hard time outdamaging Megasparce's healing from Devour, and she eventually runs out of PP for Ice Beam. It seems as though Megasparce only has Dragon-type attacks, so I revive and switch to D. Machamp.

Megasparce eventually used a move called Rage State which maximized his attack, but then used a White Herb to remove whatever downside it had. Still, if he only has Dragon-type attacks, I don't have much to worry about.

Draining Kiss does poor damage, but it's hilarious draining him after he spent so much time doing the same thing.



Now we should burn the corpses to make sure they don't come back to life.






Well, if you want to beat up your own family, there's a kid outside claiming to be your son who would LOVE to be on the receiving end of some child abuse.


"I know exactly how good you are! Take this!"

I get the Master's Sigil, the final Sigil.



Another HM? But what...

"Also, you can have this!"

He gives me TM 112 Dragonify.


"into the Dragon type!"

Interesting. Team Sparkle can use this.



I'd ask him about Stewart or these horrible abominations I just battled, but I think it's best to focus on how doomed the world is.



Yep, and Morgan said you knew how to get in.





I know that part, how do I get in?


"to seal it off."





Do we need nuclear weapons to get in? Because I was going to use one on your lab to destroy those cyborgs.



I know. I saw Maladeux use it to kill Artemis.



How can it be ancient? It was only built in the last 20 years or so. I even met the guy who stapled the magnets together. With staples.


"city."



...Are we going to catch Arceus?



Anyways, I think it's time to leave the update here.

Spoiler: Current Team (click to show/hide)

[Urist Imiknorris]

Avalugg's got decent HP and Attack, crazy nuts defense and not much else. Oh, also it weighs over eight times as much here as it does in the actual games.

I'd guess that all of Wilson's jerks are Dragon/Steel, with the possible exception of Megasparce. I'd also guess that Terraforce is Steel-type, because it's either that or Poison.

[Neonivek]

Safari Zone 4 is more accurately a "What you missed" zone. None of the pokemon you can catch in there cannot be found elsewhere.

Salamence is probably a bit more fair, because getting a Bagon is actually a bit tough to find.

[Cerol Lenslens]

First was Ursaring, who was Lv.111. The previous guy had a Lv.109 team. Somehow, I feel worried about this. He opened with Facade, which did full damage to D. Machamp, for some reason. Maybe Ursaring has an ability that negates type ineffectiveness or something.

No, Facade is just Normal type, so Delta Machamp doesn't resist it.

Last was Dunsparce. Tried to have Lucario paralyze him with Force Palm, but he instead paralyzed Lucario with Body Slam. Damn RNG.

I'm betting it had a Serene Grace, which doubles the chance of side effects from moves activating. Dunsparce has a small niche as a paraflincher because of it.


Also... Avalugg. Ugh. It's probably decent for what it does, but I really dislike its design.

[Akura]

I'd guess that all of Wilson's jerks are Dragon/Steel, with the possible exception of Megasparce. I'd also guess that Terraforce is Steel-type, because it's either that or Poison.

Machamence and I'm sure Megasparce were Dragon/Flying. Hydreigod was most likely Dragon/Dark, like its original. Everything else probably was Dragon/Steel, though. I'm not sure if CyberGoomy was Dragon, but I've never seen what it's based off of.

Maybe I should go back to Fianga's Pokehadron Collider and get that ferret-thing that was offered in trade for a 1HP Pokemon. I suddenly curious as to what that was. Maybe I'll do that before going to Varlox Cave.

First was Ursaring, who was Lv.111. The previous guy had a Lv.109 team. Somehow, I feel worried about this. He opened with Facade, which did full damage to D. Machamp, for some reason. Maybe Ursaring has an ability that negates type ineffectiveness or something.

No, Facade is just Normal type, so Delta Machamp doesn't resist it.

----

Also... Avalugg. Ugh. It's probably decent for what it does, but I really dislike its design.

Facade always confuses me. And I honestly thought Avalugg was one that was house-built for these games, judging from the quality of its graphic.

[Broken]

How many Pokemon do you have now?

[Akura]

How many Pokemon do you have now?

In total? About 200-ish. I'm filling up Box 8 now.

[Akura]

Would have updated today, but severe headache pain, weather, and life problems are saying "Nope."

[Neonivek]

Would have updated today, but severe headache pain, weather, and life problems are saying "Nope."

Sounds like you did play...

You are getting CLOSE TO HELL afterall.

[Akura]

Would have updated today, but severe headache pain, weather, and life problems are saying "Nope."

Sounds like you did play...

You are getting CLOSE TO HELL afterall.

No, I finished it the day before last, I just hurt too much to upload it.

Speaking of playing through hell...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Off to the Temple of Time Timelocked Temple to find a way to enter the 5th Sigil hall. May or may not be catching God in the process. Maybe it has to do with what Tesseract is supposed to do. So far I've seen it: cause minor earthquakes, do rather limited damage to Victreebel, teleport Zeus, disintegrate Artemis, and now it's supposed to open a cave blocked by a rock slide.



The Timelocked Temple... do I need a safecracker to get in?



Huh, looks like some ruin. It's all ruiny and such. There's bound to be something here.



Such as this. This bug has given me problems before. This one was Lv.93.



Have you ever seen the shape of an ant nest? It's pretty crazy.



Lots of Fire- and Bug-types here. There was also Heatmor, but that's a predator who feeds on bugs.



Some rubble. I guess I'll have to go around, until I can get that ability to remove tons of rubble that I'm eventually going to have to do.



Found a stair going up.

On this floor I found the Rare Box: Sacred Sword. Neat. Too bad Rare Boxes fall squarely into the Too Awesome to Use category.

Wait a moment... a Sacred Sword in a Temple of... GODDAMMIT! At least make me gather some macguffin stones and play a song!



I suppose this changes the floor plan. Or opens a black hole in a populated city. One way to find out.

It also looks like the statue the WONDER RESEARCHER had.



Well, that was partially unexpected.

The time-change removed the exactly one piece of rubble that was blocking me from going up to the next floor.



Changing floors restores the timeline. I bet Celebi and whatever other Pokémon involve temporal metaphysics must be pissed right now.

That cliff implies I must fall down. I reach another stair going down, which leads me to...



No not that, get out of the way you annoying bird.

The stair leads me to this:



God-weapon get! The description reads: "Transports user through time to deal a devastating blow. Can also be used outside of battle." Interesting. Even better, Cresselia can learn it! Go go Team Sparkle! It's a -type move with 5PP, and damage and accuracy ratings of 100.

Using the statue there warps the room so I have a path out.



Yup. Time to rip the timeline a new one.


"Tesseract move."




"to Divaevus and Zeus."







Go Team Sparkle! I wonder what he means by "mystical energy".



Unown can't learn anything!


"Effective on any given attack."






"it might end!"

Well obviously. I wouldn't be doing this if that wasn't the case.

I can use Tesseract in the field, but so far does nothing. Using it on the legendary bird statues in the north of town does nothing. I guess it's time to head to Varlox Cave.



This is the north end of Zarivar Town. As I cross the water the waterfall that leads to Varlox Cave, I catch this.



Nothing else attacks me as I make a short jaunt through an underwater tunnel to Varlox Cave.



As Wilson said, whatever may be the entrance is blocked by rocks. But now, I can open it.





Time is now screwed.



This is it, the final Sigil Hall, the Hall of Legends. It's another frickin' volcano, because I haven't had enough of those already. Also, Pokémon follower sprites don't appear here, even the ones that actually have one(I can't talk to them).

I only hope I can make it there before Zeus reaches that legendary trainer. Hah, who am I kidding, he's already there.



The hell? You guys can use Tesseract too?



I suppose you have a low opinion of him?



And he's getting a band of psychotic murderers instead.


"Hall of Legends!"

What? I'm not here to jump the guy, I'm here to stop him from being jumped.



I swear, N looks like a girl.



They open up with Zoroark(poorly disguised as ice cream) and Crobat. Zoroark isn't too hard, but N also has Reshiram. Since Reshiram thoroughly stomped my team before(the reset was accidental, the F12 key is right next to Prnt Scrn when I finally took it down) I'm going to focus on beating up Cyrus' team.



I guess fried bat is tasty too. Zoroark gets Spored this turn.



Dialga. Crap. That's one of the Creation Trio. Not sure how to fight this one since I've never played past Gen III(I probably should). Strange that it's one level lower than Crobat.

Fortunately, Victreebel is faster, and Spored Dialga. It's resistant to Electric and especially Grass, indicating... Dragon/Fire? I think Reshiram was Dragon/Fire as well.



Dialga woke up and used Roar of Time. Victreebel did not survive. Zoroark got a critical hit with Night Daze on Excadrill.

Sent out Heliolisk, realized what I was about to use and switched to Cresselia.



I was (probably) right about Dialga being Dragon/Fire, as Earthquake took it out. The attack also brought Zoroark down to a single hitpoint.



Cyrus' last Pokémon is Weavile. Shouldn't be too hard. I hoped Cresselia was faster than Excadrill(stat check - she's not). Since that's not the case, I use Cressie' turn to heal Excadrill while he drops another Earthquake.



I was hoping for a kill on Weavile, but at least Zoroark is out of the way. I just hope that Exacdrill is faster than Reshiram.





Nope. I do have an idea on how to deal with that. Meanwhile, Cresselia hits Weavile with Moonblast(she learned it at Lv.99).



Cyrus is out of the fight. Everyone, gang up on the god!

Next turn, I revive Excadrill while Heliolisk uses Bulldoze(which for some reason targets everyone like Earthquake).



She only got one turn in, but I think that should be enough. Excadrill is fairly fast(2nd only to Heliolisk herself, though by a fairly wide margin).

Next turn, similar plan, revive Heliolisk while Excadrill uses Earthquake.



May not have needed to revive Heliolisk, but at least she got the EXP for it.



This should be much easier than Reshiram. I swap Cresselia out for Lucario while Excadrill uses Rock Smash.

Vanilluxe used Blizzard that Lucario shrugged off while the game said that Excadrill "avoided the attack!". I haven't seen that message before.



Lucario and Excadrill enjoy a nice ice cream treat they certainly earned.





Dude, your eyes are kinda messed up.



Are you a hippie or something?





I AM NOT HERE TO FIGHT HIM THOUGH WHY THE HELL NOT!

I wonder who it is? I've got two guesses, one that doesn't make sense and one that would drive me irrovocably insane. The first guess would be Red, which doesn't make sense because I've already met Ash, but it is most likely anyway. The other... well, that should be obvious, no?

First though, I leave to heal up and grind. This requires two uses of Tesseract(one to alter the cave, one to return to normal and returns me to the entrance).

After a very long time grinding up, I come back.



Time to see who the legend is, after all this time.



My first guess was right, it's Red.



Uh... hello?



You're not... already dead or anything, are you? Although that would solve a significant problem if he is.



Oh, it's on.



Red looks nothing like Ash, though.



Now he does. Hmmm, that Pikachu is female. Was Ash's Pokémon's genders ever confirmed in the anime?

Presumably, Pikachu should be his best, but it's only one level higher than N and Cyrus' team.



That was a pretty underwhelming start. It only lasted one turn, and Pikachu used Live Wire. Not quite sure what that does. Victreebel was paralyzed by Pikachu's Static ability.



Now that's just a stupid choice to send against either Victreebel or Heliolisk. Come on! If this is his GSC team, doesn't he have Charizard or something? Heliolisk also absorbed the Live Wire without problem.



Blastoise tanked the first Thunderbolt, but not the second.



Now he uses Charizard. Too bad he's using it on Heliolisk.



It is, after all, possible to fry a flame dragon.



I definitely remember him having this on his GSC team.

Somehow, she knew Ice Beam. She also used Giga Impact, and I used the recharge turn to heal Victreebel's paralysis.



Now this one I don't remember him having, but I also don't remember what he had in it's place.



It hit for a lot of damage with a Life Orb-boosted Psycho Boost, but fell to an Earthquake. Just one more to go from this legendary trainer.



Sparkles for the sparkle god. Rainbows for the rainbow throne.



SPARKLES FOR THE SPARKLE GOD! RAINBOWS FOR THE RAINBOW THRONE!



I'll admit I got a little lazy with grinding her up. The only Gym Leader rematch she could reasonbly take was Devon, who has really poor EXP and money gains.

After a few turns slugging it out, Venusaur's Sp. Attack is bottomed out from Leaf Storm, and his HP bar is red. It's time.



Cresselia. Wreck time itself.


(It took two hits. Tesseract isn't that great of an attack move.)



That felt like it was easier than it should have been.






Excuse me, but are you mute or something?

No wait, he's probably dead. I mean, logically, he should be three years older than Gold(who is Zeus), but he looks my age.



Oh, he's not mute. Still on the fence about the dead part, though.

After a flash of light that I can never screenshot quickly enough...


"tessering through space."

Is "tessering" even a word?

Anyway. Zeus doesn't really have much of a sacrificial Mareep now, does he?



How so?



Hehehehehehehe...

Not quite.





Will that be a 12-inch ruler or a metric ruler?



Kinda hard to do that when he doesn't have a team to fight with.





Then both Zeus and Red are (un)dead?



Are you sure? You look like you lost the G instead.


"and rule the world!"

I suppose you haven't noticed it yet.



Oh, now you do.



Ayup. I guess that means you have to try and sacrifice me now, right?


"I win by default!"

No it doesn't! It means you don't battle at all!



For the record, I will say that killing Red won't be effective as you think it is.


That should be pointing at Zeus, but the screen panned away.




I think that too was supposed to be Zeus saying that.

Holy crap, you guys?! Wait, how the hell are Artemis and Apollo alive?!







Mom! Dad! ...Jake.


"save him just in time. How delightfully adorable."

Didn't Zeus screw all three of you over? Like, completely screwed over?
Plus, Jake is not my friend.



Well, this should be fun to watch. Two of the most elite trainers in the world and Jake against these poor idiots who still think Zeus cares for them.



Darn, no free ass-kicking show.



Humility builds character.



And I have... a half-beaten team. Great. (=_=)



Whom I've beaten before along with Maladeux the Dread Plate. Speaking of which, isn't Jake going to send that one out?



Disregarding the fact that you killed him.



Time to kick inifity's ass, then.


"extinguished from your eyes!"





Eep. He's got a full team this time. I'd have been worried with just the three from last time(Metagross, Shaymin, Divaevus).

My team is still beat up from the battle with Red too.



That's a much higher level difference as well.

Victreebel flinched twice from Air Slash, and then when I used a Full Restore, Ninjask made a Baton Pass, sending several Speed increases.



A sped-up Metagross could be a problem.

I manage to Spore it before Metagross could take Victreebel down, and swapped to Excadrill. Arceus must have wanted Metagross to die, because it slept through the two turns of Earthquakes to bring it down.





Shaymin is in Land Forme now. Either way, it's got a double weakness to Ice. But first I must heal Cresselia.

While I'm at it, since Cressie can tank Shaymin's Power Whip, I toss some healing around to everyone else.

Although I can't do as much damage as I'd like with Ice Beam, I get lucky and freeze Shaymin. Arceus must have wanted Shaymin to die, since it stayed frozen for four turns. I've had opponents defrost the same turn they freeze, which is crap since it's rather hard to freeze them in the first place.





I hate Gengar. I hate Gengar a lot.



This is why.



Gengar had Shadow Tag, so I couldn't swap out. However, I did manage to Spore him, and took out half his HP before he woke.



I send Heliolisk to take out the rest.



I don't care whether Arceus wanted you to die or not, DIE.



This one generally has Levitate, so I can't use Earthquake.

Elektross also had Superpower, so I switch to D. Machamp. He tried to use Dragon Tail upon switching in, but of course that doesn't work.

I use the fact that Elektross can't do jack to D. Machamp to heal up again. For some reason, she waited until I was finished to start using moves like Ice Beam and Discharge, paralyzing D. Machamp.



Still wasn't enough.



Hooo boy.

Still, if the Divine Plate is what made Arceus Normal-type, then Divaevus should be making a god-call to Lucario's fist!

Unfortunately, after one turn I learned that A) Divaevus is NOT weak to Fighting and B) Tesseract brought Lucario down to 7 HP. However, since I can't risk someone else getting blasted by Tesseract, I try to Full Restore and hope I can burn out its PP.

Conjecturing that Divaevus is -type, like Tesseract, and therefore gains STAB with it.

I use a lot of Full Restores, but Divaevus eventually runs out of Tesseract and switches to ExtremeSpeed and Dragon Pulse, which barely scratch Lucario. A critical hit from Force Palm leaves Divaevus paralyzed and barely alive.

Time to finish this.





And God is officially bitch-slapped.

Now, one last thing.



That would be a little more sane if you had the god out, not that beetle.



"Screw you! I'm not a bug-zapper!"





Well, it is pretty funny.





Seems that way. So much for infinite power.





Good luck with that, Dad. That girl has survived a tactical nuke and a Tesseract both to the face. And her brother survived the nuke and cancer.



Oh nevermind, she just steps aside.


"As long as I'm alive I will always-"


...But aren't you dead? I mean, you thought you hadn't aged since you last met Red...





Eesh.



Tell me you're going to dispose of that abomination's... wastes properly, like in an incinerator. Preferably the sun.



I'm assuming? Unless there's some other thing we need to be reminded of catastrophically.



Well... let's see.

Ł1.2 million for the land value of Nyasa town.

Ł500,000 or so in medicine and training fees for just my team alone.

Ł2.4 million for the manufacturing costs of all those damn Master Balls.

Ł3.2 million in taxpayer funds for Pokémon Center care.

Ł7 million on research studies on Victini to see if it can actually cure cancer(it can't, sorry Apollo).

Am I missing anything?



Oh right, the human cost.



Fuck that, I wasn't going to be sacrificed.



Well, if your ability to survive things that you should not possibly have survived runs in your family, I don't think you have to worry about your brother.


"properly treated in prison. Your brother is safe."

And, I'm assuming, a fair trial? Nevermind, the Vesryn legal system is a joke.



Personally, I would have been up for just letting them go.


"suffering all came to a head in that battle."

A year? But I started this back in... June. It's October. That's only five months unless I really suck at math.



Thanks, Mom.


"and morality. You are truly one with your Pokémon."

Wait, what? I didn't choose Jake to be my rival. He kinda pushed it on me. And as for my morality, may I introduce you to Phione?



Err, what?





Time will tell, I suppose.


"other way around."

Speaking of which, that list of financial costs I just read.

Oh, nevermind, that's pretty tacky.


"new Tesseract ability of yours."


"and see me in Blackfist City, okay?"

Hehe. Come here Jake.

*appears to put arm around Jake's shoulder, then switches to a headlock before pushing Jake's face near the surrounding lava*

You see this lava here. Realistically, at this close it should have been fatal to the both of us. If I ever see you again, we'll see if physics still fail to apply when I throw you in there.


"be your father."



Of course, that'd be even more awkward than it already is otherwise.



Oh, god, not you too Mom.


"Region, and Hall of Legends conquerer!"

I'm not blushing. It's really hot in here because of all the damn LAVA.



Well... that's it then?

For the main story, I mean.

Oh well. I've heard that there's far more post-plot content to check out.

So, next update I will begin to wander around aimlessly.


NOTE: Before leaving the Hall of Legends, I find that an Absolite was left for me. Huh.

Spoiler: Current Team (click to show/hide)

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

Looks like there was a graphical glitch where Red was standing.

[Broken]

Looking at Zeus last team, i am going to guess that 120 is the level cap.

Also, i have started my own run, a solo run with a magicarp (Now Gyarados)

[Urist Imiknorris]

Now-useless tip: Dialga is Dragon/Steel.