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[smurfingtonthethird]

Meet George.

He's an average 16-year-old Australian student. He has decent grades, a healthy lifestyle, a few good friends, a stable family, and a crush he's too chicken to ask out.

How pitifully boring. He's walking to school right now. We should make his life more exciting, right? I wonder how we can 'improve' it.


Welcome to Roll to Butt Monkey, a suggestion game. The rules are simple: you, as a member of the Powers that Be, suggest something to influence his life, the thing with the most suggestions gets rolled, and then shit happens to George.

Sure, you could get him crushed by a car, but then his career as a butt monkey would end quite quickly. Hilarious shenanigans are much, much better.

[Lyeos]

Cause a brief bout of paralysis while he's moving forwards, preferably as he's in the street.

((Psssh! Editing is silly!))

Cause a brief bout of paralysis as he's moving forwards, preferably while he's behind an attractive chick so he'll hit her... Back... With his face.

[Jack A T]

Have what Lyeos suggested happen, but recorded via a security camera.

[blazing glory]

Have George get ambushed by a bunch of bullies,when asked by a teacher/principle he would have a extreme fit of stammering preventing him from explaining what happened.

[_DivideByZero_]

Crash my potato truck next to George.

Seconded.

[NAV]

Give George a nice Canadian winter.

[Yoink]

Have George's legs hideously mangled by an out-of-control road train.
This way people will be even more impressed when he goes on to have a successful career as a tap dancer!

[superBlast]

Crash my potato truck next to George.

Seconded.

I third it!

[smurfingtonthethird]

Crash my potato truck next to George.

Seconded.

I third it!

[3]

The potato truck crashes on the other side of the road, splattering him with potato chunks. He runs over and rescues the driver. The locals commend him for his bravery and later his picture ends up in the newspaper. GOOD JOB FIXING IT GUYS

[TamerVirus]

However, the newspaper used a pictures of a hobo instead of George! He's now a laughingstock in school

[blazing glory]

Have someone else appear in the newspaper who did a much greater deed,this will get George depressed.

We have more fun if he's depressed.

[Propman]

Have George's house be built upon a sinkhole that has recently begun its sinking activities, thus enveloping his only place of residence (possessions and family being a bonus) and leaving him homeless.

[hops]

Search for a monkey

[VinnieTheDead]

Have George experience sudden anal prolapse.

[Yoink]

The heroic George gets invited to a big party planned by the cool kids of the school.
Of course, drugs and underage alcohol will be abundant at such an event...