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[hops]

You know all these items that just make more of themselves could be very useful. Crushing people with wands/decks of cards would be pretty awesome.

Gringotts, anyone?

Amulet of Mime: Amulet that render the wearer silent and able to create psionic objects. However, they also get hit by stray objects made by gesticulations.

[Tawa]

Astral Wand: A magic wand with no spells that is made of solid, pink mist. The solid mist is not really notable for any reason, but it's made out of it.

[Audioworm333]

Bee-Bee Gun: It's a gun that shoots bees. Completely useless because you can't just shove bees into a magazine and expect them to stay alive.

[Squeegy]

Reckless Feckless Neckless Necklace - A necklace that violently breaks apart when placed around a neck, mildly injuring and disorienting anyone nearby, including the user.

[Arcvasti]

Boots of Neck-Lace: Boots with laces that need to be tied around your neck or they fall off constantly.

[Ozarck]

Fife of JIggly-Butt. Wiggle wiggle, jiggle jiggle. Yeah!

[IcyTea31]

Boots of Ritualized Jumping: These boots, when activated, allow the user to jump over 5 meters far or up. To activate, a complex gymnastic sequence must be performed, including a 6-meter assisted jump with a backflip.

[Arcvasti]

Sleeping bag of parkour: A sleeping bag, that, when worn over the face, confers the abilities of a parkour master.

[NAV]

The worst dice: A set of dice that always roll the least interesting possible result.
Shackles of the archer: A pair of handcuffs, that when worn give the user legendary skill with a bow.
8 ball gold is real: A magic 8-ball that gives the correct answer to any question, translated so many times it doesn't make any sense.
Ring of the giant: It makes the wearer 100m tall. It doesn't protect them from the square-cube law.

[hops]

Amulet of Death-saving: Protects the wearer from living.
Wand of Necropost: A wand that resurrects dead posts. This mainly just turn them back into trees and piss off the people who installed the post there.
Bag of Holing: A bag that connects to an empty infinite dimension, causing explosive decompression.
Spectacles of Das All-seeing: A pair of glasses that, when worn, allow the wearer to see the shape of the universe. Congratulations.

[NJW2000]

Ring of the Evil Accountant: makes the wearer glow green when they fail to pay their income tax correctly.
Legendary Arrow of Minkot: a heavy iron arrow capable of firing any bow dozens of metres.
Ring of the Evilest Eye: heals any wounds sustained by the wearer upon death.
Bracelet of Tiresias: when worn, the wearer is blind.

[Blood_Librarian]

BarrenCott Crystalline rifle: A delicate and magical flintlock rifle with a barrel made of crystal glass. anyone who fires the gun will have the barrel of the gun explode, and the gun promptly disappears form the users hands and into another land. the crystalline shards from the barrel stays, but a new barrel replaced the old ones place.

[Ozarck]

The Eye of There's Waldo: a lens with a red and white striped frame, slightly larger than is comfortable for a human adult to wear. When placed in front of an eye, the user can instantly locate Waldo in any of the Where's Waldo pictures placed before them. This includes fanart, and those "there ain't no Waldos" pictures, which show as greytone images.

[Khan Boyzitbig]

Cursed Amulet of the Guildmaster: Constantly asks the user if they have any potions or food. Cannot be removed.
Helm of Total Vulnerability: Makes the wearer completely vulnerable to anything and everything.
Wand of Explosions: When cast the wand causes everything in a 5 mile radius to fart uncontrollably for 3 months 6 days 2 hours 4 minutes and 8 seconds.
Nuclear reactor of Incontinence:When used to hit someone or approaches critical mass this object causes the target to become incontinent, on approach to critical mass the target/s are anyone who can stop it hitting critical mass. The object will approach critical mass as soon as it is used for any reason.

[RenoFox]

I love this kind of threads, and I'd really like to see some of the items posted here actually in a game.

Amulet of Slow Fall: When worn around the neck, this amulet will never descend faster than a floating feather.
Armor of Urgency: A full suit of platemail that gains extra protection proportionate to the wearers need to pee.
Bracers of the Wolf: Turns the wearers hands into paws.