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[Harry Baldman]

Kick the ninja in the nuts repeatedly, then steal each and every one of his teeth.

[darkpaladin109]

Kick the ninja in the nuts repeatedly, then steal each and every one of his teeth.

SECRET NINJA TECNIQUE: COUNTER NUT KICK

[Tune of Dwarves]

Find good flintlocks

[ckisocoa]

Kick the ninja in the nuts repeatedly, then steal each and every one of his teeth.

[2] You miss the ninja's nuts entirely and fail to get any teeth.

Kick the ninja in the nuts repeatedly, then steal each and every one of his teeth.

SECRET NINJA TECNIQUE: COUNTER NUT KICK

[3] SECRET NINJA TECHIQUE: FAILURE AT LIFE.

Find good flintlocks

[2] You find nothing.
((Wow, super bad rolls.))

[Harry Baldman]

Well then, submerge the ninja's head in a barrel of grog until he stops moving for good plus 60 seconds for security.

[Tune of Dwarves]

Find 2 of the greatest flintlock pistols for me

Find a good blunderbuss

[ckisocoa]

Well then, submerge the ninja's head in a barrel of grog until he stops moving for good.

[6] You sumberge him and he stops moving. For good? Maybe. ((Awaiting dark's roll))

Find 2 of the greatest flintlock pistols for me

Find a good blunderbuss

[8] YOU FIND TWO OF THE GREATEST FLINTLOCK PISTOLS TO EVER GRACE THE SURFACE OF THE EARTH. You are now bound to only using those two pistols, no matter the situation. They come with no ammo. ((barring other rolls of course.))
[6] You find a good blunderbuss, though, what use do you have for it?

[Harry Baldman]

Add 60 seconds on top of this holding time. Gotta be sure!

[Lyeos]

Keep doing nothing.

Become a pirate.

[Tune of Dwarves]

Get some damn ammo for the two flintlock pistols

[Beirus]

Stab the idiot who played Finger Filet and sunk my ship.

Swim to shore.

[ckisocoa]

Add 60 seconds on top of this holding time. Gotta be sure!

[5] You keep him under for 25 seconds. He's still kinda twitching.

Keep doing nothing.

Become a pirate.

[8] In the process of doing nothing, you become incflicted with Advancing Age ((MGS Reference for the win)). You age 3x faster than the normal man. You are 35.
[1] Haha.

Get some damn ammo for the two flintlock pistols

[1] You find nothing. You decide to eat some dirt.

Stab the idiot who played Finger Filet and sunk my ship.

Swim to shore.

[1] You're in water with no supplies, seriously; what were you thinking?
[2] You attempt to swim, but start sinking. Your father never taught you to swim, WHY ARE YOU A PIRATE!?

[Harry Baldman]

Well, the cure for not having drowned in what amounts to battery acid is more drowning in what amounts to battery acid, obviously! So drown the ninja in that grog!

[darkpaladin109]

REVEAL THAT I AM IN FACT A STUDENT OF THE ART OF BOOZE MAGIC
BE IMMUNE TO HIS FEEBLE ATTEMPTS TO DROWN ME IN BOOZE
BOOZE HIM TO DEATH

[Beirus]

Teach myself to swim out of necessity.

If that fails, learn to breath underwater. If I do swim to shore from my earlier attempt of learning to swim, then get the Greatest, most awesome and epic pirate weapons ever.