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[scriver]

I felt I had to share this with the world: The sum of all dwarven fears.



There is only one certainty in life. Sooner or later, the Carp of the Deep comes for us all.

[FrankMcFuzz]

I just want to say that Zan Hammermaw, who I will refer to as the Hammer of The Fish God, is my favourite dwarf from that list.

[neblime]

you must become a necromancer and raise a carp army for the glory of Kin Goldencloud!

[PDF urist master]

only dwarves worship him, which make me think that dwarves pray to him before war with their enemies.

[Loud Whispers]

only dwarves worship him, which make me think that dwarves pray to him before war with their enemies.

For some reason I'm imagining shakespearean plays where the characters are all Dwarves shouting their archaic insults at their enemies. "LET THE CARP TAKE YOU, YOU GUTTER CRUOR!"

[wierd]

... Now I have twisted version of hamlet and McBeth in my head.

You are an evil man whispers. Evil.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

McBeth
Act 4, scene 1, Dwarf fortress edition

 A dark Cave. In the middle, a Caldron boiling. Thunder.

                Enter the three Witches.

       1 WITCH.  Thrice the bludgeoned cat hath mew'd.
       2 WITCH.  Thrice and once, the zombie-pig whin'd.
       3 WITCH.  Harpy cries:—'tis time! 'tis time!
       1 WITCH.  Round about the caldron go;
    In the rotting entrails throw.—
    Toad, that under cold stone,
    Days and nights has thirty-one;
    Swelter'd venom sleeping got,
    Boil thou first i' the charmed pot!
       ALL.  Double, double toil and trouble;
    Fire burn, and caldron bubble.
       2 WITCH.  Lungfish from a saltwater lake,
    In the caldron boil and bake;
    Red hide root, and bulb from bog,
    giant bat, and tongue of dog,
    tatter rags, and scorpion sting,
    Lizard's leg, and keah's wing,—
    For a charm of powerful trouble,
    Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.
       ALL.  Double, double toil and trouble;
    Fire burn, and caldron bubble.
       3 WITCH.  Scale of dragon; tooth of wolf;
    ancient mummy; maw and gulf
    Of the ravin'd salt-sea shark;
    Purple mushroom digg'd i the dark;
    Platter of flybrains, pureed and true;
    Gall of goat, and ostritch too,
    Sliver'd in the moon's eclipse;
    Pools of murk, and undead fish;
    Finger of were-beast babe
    Ditch-deliver'd by a drab,—
    Make the gruel thick and slab:
    Add thereto a leg of goblin,
    For the ingrediants of our caldron.
       ALL.  Double, double toil and trouble;
    Fire burn, and caldron bubble.
       2 WITCH.  Cool it with a baboon's blood,
    Then the charm is firm and good.

...

And that's how you make a *<*Giant Bat Roast*>*

[Loud Whispers]

Any evil I do I do it for Carp God Goldencloud.

DF Shakespeare is a thing now.

[FrankMcFuzz]

What magma through yonder non-magma safe floodgate breaks?

[neblime]

Wierd we should start a DF shakespeare thread in your honour.... if you don't want to start one yourself?