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[NAV]

Yay! Eat a painkiller.

Give Magarth the peg leg, a painkiller, and also give his icepick back.

"Thanks for being so oblivious, mate. Here's your stuff back, with a bit extra."

[flabort]

Wake up and mutter something about green fluids and purple rocks.

Spoiler: Wasted Bastard: Blue Team, 0 Points (click to show/hide)

Name: Wasted Bastard
Description: A guy who's so thin that his bones show, and his hips form a bowl in which stuff can be held. His stringy greasy hair is falling out in chunks, but reaches down to his lowest rib. His eyes bulge out like nothing you've ever seen, and dart this way and that without end. He's coated in a blue crystalline powder, probably from rolling in some drugs like a cat with catnip.
Reason for signing up: Out of money for drugs and food and rent, so need, like, 20 bucks to make it this month.
Stats:
Strength: 1 (wish this could be 0 for the auto fail)
Dexterity: 11
Endurance: -8 (I mean, 1)
Speed: 2
Intelligence: 1
Luck: 10
Will: 1
Perception: Negative infinity (1)

[Beirus]

Spoiler: Mason Caldwell-Blue Barbarians-8 points (click to show/hide)

Name: Mason Caldwell
Description: A middle-aged male with brown hair and brown eyes. He has a slightly muscular build and his whole body is covered with scars, a testament to the hard life he has lived.
Reason for signing up: He wants to be a Magister, to have all the power that comes with the position.
Stats: (20 points to allocate. 5 Points in a stat gives a 1/3 chance of +1. 10 gives 2/3, etc.)
Strength:3
Dexterity:3
Endurance:15
Speed:3
Intelligence:1
Luck:1
Will:1
Perception:1
Inventory: Replacement leg, replacement hand, Katana sword thing, Athlete suit (4 charges left?), mostly used first aid kit.

Stand up and stretch. Prepare for next episode.

[Doomblade187]

Doomblade187- 7 DD

Return to the arena and find myself a good seat.

[Hapah]

Return to arena; check price of rifle ammo.

[Kriellya]

Return to the arena, collect pay check for attending

[swordsmith04]

Arrive at arena, receive DD.

[syvarris]

Recieve DD

[Xantalos]

Wake up. Shit on weasel. Receive DD.

[Playergamer]

DD plox!

[Elephant Parade]

Do a quick write-up on my experiences so far.

Spoiler: Flimsy Not-Wizard (click to show/hide)

Name: Flimsy Not-Wizard
Description: A guy with a wizard hat.
Reason for signing up: To become a wizard!
Stats: (20 points to allocate. 5 Points in a stat gives a 1/3 chance of +1. 10 gives 2/3, etc.)
Strength:1
Dexterity:1
Endurance:1
Speed:1
Intelligence:21
Luck:1
Will:1
Perception:1

[TCM]

Check for self-existence.

[Yoink]

Jobasio grimaced, staring at the awful covers of the Space-Zumba DVDSs, and then set his jaw.
Not today. He was going to maintain what dignity he had.

>Hire some sort of wholesome kids movie and drop it off at home for my sisters, then head to the stadium and find a decent seat.

[Beirus]

Check for self-existence.

((Magarth lives. Mason stopped the bleeding. Also, Navarro made a peg leg for you. Although you might want to buy a replacement from the machine.))

[piecewise]

Ugh, bay12 is loading like....a thing that loads very poorly right now.

Retrieve DD from dead body. Go on news and give them the story of how this man commited a murder spree because of future video games.

You don't get the DD, mr. murder. But you can blame all the violence on Grand Theft Auto China-9.

Yay! Eat a painkiller.

Give Magarth the peg leg, a painkiller, and also give his icepick back.

"Thanks for being so oblivious, mate. Here's your stuff back, with a bit extra."

You swallow one of the 5 pain killers the machine gave you. Man. You feel better already! You can't even feel your wounds! Fuck man, You feel great! Feel like you could run a marathon, chop down a tree and impregnate 5, nay 6 women all in the same day. Maybe at the same time.

Doomblade187- 7 DD

Return to the arena and find myself a good seat.

5 dd for you

Return to arena; check price of rifle ammo.

It's marked as Ammo on the price list. Convert to DD.

3 dd

Return to the arena, collect pay check for attending

6 dd

Arrive at arena, receive DD.

8 dd

Recieve DD

6 dd

Wake up. Shit on weasel. Receive DD.

3 dd

DD plox!

7 dd

Jobasio grimaced, staring at the awful covers of the Space-Zumba DVDSs, and then set his jaw.
Not today. He was going to maintain what dignity he had.

>Hire some sort of wholesome kids movie and drop it off at home for my sisters, then head to the stadium and find a decent seat.

>Hire some sort of wholesome kid's movie
>Hire some sort
>Hire

Welp, your 40 minute attempt to negotiate a labor contract with a dvd of shrek 430230 electric boogaloo proves unsuccessful.

5 dd

STATIC

And welcome, once again, to a new episode of DEAD MAN RUNNING! The Most Popular show on Earth-3! Now, our contestants had hard show yesterday, but one of them, the one over there in a shiny new Athlete's suit, came out with a frankly absurd amount of points! And Poor old Xen, he had himself a hard day. Strangled and shot. It was like an old country western, except everyone was "The Ugly".

Now then, before we begin our team event, I'll need one person from each team! A brave Captain who is willing to do undertake the very dangerous task of wearing this Captain's hat. Come on now, don't be shy. And don't make us chose for you! We chose by lining you up and letting the audience throw lawn darts!